found a note among Moriah’s things. Among other things, she wrote that if we win the lottery, we
gone to the Nova party in Re’im. We searched for her day and night among the missing,
should use it to benefit the public. Well, a lottery isn’t always cash. Alongside the unbearable pain of losing a child, I feel that I’ve won a different kind of lottery—a lottery of strength, of life, of being blessed with such a pure soul who continues to bring light into our lives. And Moriah asked us to share that good with the public. It’s clear to me that Dr. Schussheim’s lecture was so powerful, it was able to influence me so many years later, ultimately guiding me to make the right decision. EFRAT’s ads, like the one I saw on the bus in Tzfat, are also very important for creating awareness. Also, I think it’s crucial that every woman understands the process of the embryo growing inside her, the reality of what it means to bring life into the world. When we’re informed, we can make choices not out of pressure, but out of a deeper understanding of what’s truly at stake. The lecture by Dr. Schussheim so many years ago that I remember impressed upon women the responsibility they have when they become pregnant — not only to the unborn child, but to themselves. It’s not just about getting an abortion and moving on. There are consequences! Everyone experiences it differently, but if they would be more aware, they would be more careful, especially if they don’t want to have an abortion. I can say with conviction, that had I gone through with the abortion, I would have been completely shattered by Moriah’s loss, to the point
where I don’t know how I would have
not knowing if she had been taken captive, until we received the horrible news that she had been murdered. The loss was excruciating. It was afterward that I began to understand the nature of the gift I had been given. What I had looked upon as a punishment, a burden, was actually a miracle. The child that I had reluctantly brought into the world became my light, my strength, the reason I could get up each morning and continue living after losing Moriah. I recalled things she had told me, “Ima, you are blessed. Please be grateful! When you are overcome by fear, it prevents you from seeing the good.” Moriah had very strong emunah. She believed that even when life is hard, it is for our good. Her words ring truer now than ever before. This child brought so much light into our home, and Moriah, especially, adored him. She would call just to hear his voice, to connect with him. Now, in her absence, he continues to be a source of light and life for all of us. Hashem takes a child and gives a child. I’m now in a place where I understand that nothing belongs to us, not our house, not our parnassah, not our very selves – everything is from Hashem, and whatever he does is for our good.
ever recovered.
My dear son is one of the greatest gifts of my life, the remedy that Hashem gave me before the tragedy.
Dear Sivan, I met you at your lecture in Ramat HaSharon, and I gave you the sticker that we printed in memory of my niece, Moriah Or Suissa, Hy”d, who was murdered in October at the Nova festival in Re’im. This was the phrase that she chose to put on her WhatsApp and on all her social media profiles: The world was created for me, and I am but dust and ashes.
I decided to reach out to EFRAT with my story after I
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