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June 2024
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THE BLESSING OF FATHERS
Celebrating Their Influence This Month
As we enter June, our family will soon be celebrating our oldest son’s middle school graduation. It seems like yesterday that he was starting pre-K at Snug Harbor Montessori School, and I was teaching him how to throw a baseball and swing a bat. I could not be prouder of the young man he has become. Owen has been a great role model for his two younger brothers — he is kind, patient, sharing, empathetic, and optimistic (I could go on …). As I look back at how far we have come, I wanted to share my reflections on fatherhood as we also celebrated Father’s Day this month. Father’s Day is a time to honor and celebrate the fathers and father figures in our lives, acknowledging their love, sacrifice, and guidance. It’s a day to express gratitude for all they have done for us, including being an example of how to raise our own children. I have two older brothers who both got married and had kids before I did. I was an uncle four times before Owen was born. I remember the first thing my dad said to me while we were still in the hospital: “Being a dad sure beats being an uncle, doesn’t it?” Just one more thing Dad was right about! I never met my two grandfathers as they had already passed away before I was born. In fact, my father’s dad died when he was just 4 years old. Earlier this year, I mentioned how excited I was to help my dad write a book about his childhood, including memories of his father. It was great to see him accomplish a lifelong goal of writing a book. I don’t remember how old I was when I understood that my dad grew up without his father, but I do recall feeling lucky I had a dad I could rely on for guidance when needed. It can be easy to take our parents for granted — even as we grow into adults. Of course, having children of our own provides even more appreciation for the sacrifices our
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parents made for us. I hope I can provide the same guidance to my boys that my dad has given to me. Growing up, my father was a source of strength and support, guiding me through life’s challenges. He taught me the importance of hard work, perseverance, and integrity. Fatherhood, to me, is about being present and actively involved in my
children’s lives. It’s about teaching them values of kindness, resilience, and integrity and imparting wisdom that will help them navigate their future. As a family, we recently celebrated my dad’s 80th birthday with family and friends. It was a great reminder of how my dad has impacted the lives of so many people. I feel lucky to have had the opportunity to celebrate this milestone with him, to express my gratitude for all he has done for me, and to honor the memories we have shared together. From summers at the beach and holiday gatherings to quiet moments of wisdom and guidance, my dad has been a constant presence in my life, and I am forever grateful for his love and support. Father’s Day is a celebration filled with gratitude and joy. We honor the fathers and father figures who have touched our lives and embrace the lessons they have taught us along the way. As we commemorate milestones like my father’s 80th birthday or our children’s graduations, let us cherish the moments we share with our loved ones, expressing our love and appreciation for the precious gift of family.
-Brian O’Connor
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LANDLORDS RESIST SECURITY DEPOSIT RETURNS RENTAL RIDDLE
2 | 718-948-3500 HELPING INJURED NEW YORKERS Kentucky, Washington, and Green Bee Memphis’s state of Tennessee, among others, require landlords to keep security deposits in a separate account maintained for that purpose. In Connecticut, Maryland, Massachusetts, Illinois, and other states, those accounts must pay interest that must be returned to renters. “Renters often worry (for good reason) about getting their security deposits back. Landlords hold all the cards and can devise countless reasons why they are entitled to keep your cash after you move out.” ” Renters often worry (for good reason) about getting their security deposits back. Landlords hold all the cards and can devise countless reasons why they are entitled to keep your cash after you move out. “When I was a renter, I never once received a security deposit back,” Green Bee Memphis, a Memphis Realtor, declared in a 2023 video on TikTok. U.S. renters are among the nation’s most economically vulnerable people. According to the Joint Center for Housing Studies at Harvard University, nearly half of all renters spend more than 30% of their income on rent and utilities, a level that housing experts consider burdensome. A record-high 22.4 million renters fell into this category in 2022, up about 2% from three years earlier. No wonder the 1 in 3 Americans who rent are concerned about getting their security deposits back. Landlords tend to occupy the opposite end of the economic spectrum, and all states have enacted at least some legal protections for renters. State laws vary, but all require landlords to return security deposits to renters within 14–60 days after they move out, according to Nolo.com’s Legal Encyclopedia.
When landlords withhold security deposit refunds, they are typically required to give renters a list of damages to justify their decision. And they should not charge renters for routine cleaning or ordinary wear and tear — only for careless or willful damage or excessive filth. Defining ordinary wear and tear can be difficult. For example, suppose a landlord installs new carpeting before a tenant moves in, and the tenant stays four years. In that case, the carpet will inevitably show some wear after the tenant moves out, but this is typically regarded as ordinary wear and tear — not a repair that tenants should be required to cover. Other examples offered by Nolo.com include linoleum stains from shower spray, which is ordinary wear and tear, versus broken tiles in the bathroom, which is damage. Similarly, dents in the wall where a door handle bumped constitute normal wear and tear, while a door ripped off the hinges is damage. Tenants should notify landlords in writing within 3–5 days of moving in about any damage to the apartment so they won’t be billed for it later. One of the most common causes of tenant-landlord lawsuits is a landlord’s refusal to return a security deposit. Tenants who want to contest a landlord’s decision should gather evidence, including move-in and move-out reports and photos, and state their position in a dispute letter. If out-of-court efforts to settle a dispute fail, tenants usually can file suit in small claims court.
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TAKE A BREAK
IT’S FATHER’S DAY!
Children Create Unique Dad’s Day Gifts
Recently, people have been spending big on Father’s Day, and many wait until the very last minute. Last year, Americans spent a record $22.9 billion on Father’s Day, up nearly 10% from the previous year, according to an industry survey. And more than half of consumers don’t start shopping until the week before Father’s Day, while 3.5% wait until the very last day before the holiday, according to another survey. The second survey also revealed that over 75% of shoppers struggle to think of good Father’s Day ideas. Most settle on outings, clothing, gift cards, personal care items, or electronics. Here are three low-budget ideas you can do with your kids that are sure to charm any dad, offered by What’s Up Moms, a top parenting site on YouTube co-founded by vlogger Elle Walker. Interview Cards If your kids are preschoolers, have them answer questions about their father and record their answers on notecards. Things like, “How old do you think Daddy is? 100? What is one thing Daddy says? What does Daddy do for work? Why do you love Daddy?” The simplicity and innocence of your children’s answers will warm Dad’s heart more than any store- bought gift ever could. Shopping Spree Give each child $10 to pick out something for Dad, all by themselves, then take them to the nearest big-box store. Walker’s youngsters came up with a mirror, a pair of swim trunks, and crib sheets, and they clearly loved being empowered to make choices. Photos From a Kid’s Perspective You may be surprised at some of the angles children choose and the tender moments they capture, “even if they’re not wow-worthy,” Walker says. Her daughter caught a captivating shot of her husband, Ross, napping with their preschool son resting on his shoulder.
SUMMER CHICKEN SALAD
Ingredients
Inspired by FoodNetwork.com
Dressing • 3/4 cup crumbled feta cheese • 1/2 cup half and half • 1/4 cup mayonnaise • 1/4 cup sour cream • 1 tsp sugar • Juice of 1 lemon
• 3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts • Salt and pepper • 4 ears of corn, shucked • 3 tbsp minced dill
• 3 stalks celery, finely diced • 1 red onion, finely diced • 1 1/2 cups blueberries • 1 head of butter lettuce
Directions 1. Place chicken in a large plastic bag and pound with a mallet to flatten to 1/4-inch thickness. Drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. 2. Heat grill, then grill chicken on both sides for about 4 minutes per side; set aside to cool before slicing. 3. Grill corn until the kernels begin browning, turning regularly for even cooking. Use a knife to shave the kernels off. 4. In a bowl, mix all dressing ingredients until combined. 5. In a large bowl, combine corn, dill, celery, and onions, then stir in chicken and top with dressing and blueberries as desired. 6. Separate the head of butter lettuce into “cups” to fill with salad and enjoy!
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HELPING INJURED NEW YORKERS
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INSIDE THIS ISSUE
1
The Blessing of Fathers
2
Know Your Rights: Get Your Security Deposit Back
Summer Chicken Salad
3
3 Easy Father’s Day Ideas
4
Odd Laws Protect Salamanders and Seaweed
WEIRD STATE LAWS SAFEGUARD SALAMANDERS AND SEAWEED WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?
Ignorance about the law is usually not a defense if you’re caught in a violation. Some oddball state laws, however, are so strange that they could only be described as booby traps for the unknowing. Here are two legislative oddities sure to surprise any hapless offender. 76 Salamanders A popular YouTube commentator has called out the state of Illinois for barring anyone from owning more than 75 salamanders. Why? Several salamander species are classified as endangered in Illinois, and the state regulates the commercial trade of these amphibians. The law assumes any resident who possesses salamanders valued at $600 or more intends to market them commercially — illegally. The law estimates the value of a salamander at $5, suggesting it actually prohibits owning 120 salamanders. But who’s counting? Nighttime Seaweed From the annals of lawmaking history, a 1973 New Hampshire law banned any effort to “carry away or
collect for the purpose of carrying away any seaweed … between evening and daylight.”
The backstory: Farmers in New Hampshire once collected seaweed from the beaches to use as fertilizer, leading at least one town to ban nighttime harvesting to “give everyone an equal chance” at stocking up on seaweed. However, after a group of high school students singled out the law as the state’s dumbest, lawmakers repealed it in 2016. Not all states with stupid laws are culpable. Internet jokesters questioned South Dakota about a law supposedly barring people from falling asleep in a cheese factory. The actual law makes a lot more sense: It bans setting up your bedroom in a space used to prepare food for the public. Noting the error, a Sioux Falls radio station, Hot 104.7, fired back at critics, creating their own new category of missteps: “Stupid questions people ask about South Dakota.” Fair enough!
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