40 METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPTEMBER-OCTOBER 2026 Suicide exists on a spectrum. From thoughts about dying (suicidal ideation) to suicide attempts and death by suicide, experts emphasize that any mention of suicide should be taken seriously and deserves immediate attention. While the prevalence of mental health disorders and rates of suicide increase as children grow older, recent research suggests that about five percent of 9- and 10-year-olds have experienced thoughts of suicide. Myth: Talking about suicide puts the idea in a child’s head. Fact: Research consistently shows asking directly does not increase suicidal thoughts. Talking About Suicide With Kids BY AMELIA ROESSLER There may be no conversation a parent fears more than asking, “Are you thinking about hurting yourself?” It’s a question many parents hope they will never have to ask—but mental health experts say asking directly, calmly, and without judgment can save a child’s life. Suicide is the second leading cause of death for 10- to 19-year-olds and it affects people of all backgrounds. But most children and adolescents who attempt suicide show warning signs, and it is vital that families are aware of these signs and discuss concerns. Understanding Suicide According to research by the Nationwide Children’s Hospital, suicide attempts are far more common than deaths by suicide, but any suicidal behavior is serious and can have lasting consequences. Most teens who are suicidal do not actually wish to die, but they are in severe emotional pain and want the pain to stop. They may not know how to move forward and are unsure if there are ways to feel better. The good news is that suicides are largely preventable through early identification, timely treatment, and support from families, schools, friends and communities.
For children who have a hard time admitting they need help, having a conversation sends the message that a parent cares about them, and that asking for help is okay. See the Signs When a child talks about or posts online about wanting to die or hurt themselves on purpose, it’s important that family members, caring adults, and friends respond. Often, children expressing themselves through such ideas are typically experiencing emotional distress and may not know the tools to use to help them through these experiences. The following warning signs, provided by the Nationwide Children’s Hospital, indicate that a youth is severely depressed or at risk for suicide and should be responded to: ■ Talking to others or posting on social media about: suicide or wanting to die or feeling hopeless, trapped or like they are “a burden” to others ■ Looking for ways to kill themselves by gathering medications, sharp objects or firearms, or searching online for ways to end their life ■ Expressing unbearable emotional pain ■ Reaching out to people to say “goodbye” ■ Giving away prized possessions ■ Suddenly becoming calm or cheerful after a long period of depression The following warning signs indicate that a youth may be struggling with depression, which requires evaluation by a professional: ■ Feeling sad or irritable more often than not ■ Sleeping or eating more or less than usual ■ Showing little to no interest in activities ■ Withdrawing from others ■ Participating in reckless behavior ■ Engaging in self-injurious behavior There are also risk factors that may make some people more vulnerable to suicide that families and parents should keep in mind.
According to Child Mind Institute, a family history of suicide, bullying and access to things like firearms and pills can all be factors that may put a child at risk. Knowing the Age Difference Ages 3–6 Can young children understand death? Should you mention suicide to them? What if they overhear adults talking? How honest should I be? Questions like that are asked by parents all the time. Experts advise to use simple language when talking to young children and avoid euphemisms like “went to sleep.” Make sure to reassure children that they are safe, and encourage questions. Ages 7–10 Kids this age may hear about suicide at school or on YouTube. Now, parents might have more questions like: What if my child hears about suicide at school? How much detail should I give? Can talking about suicide plant the idea? Experts say that talking about suicide does not increase suicide thoughts, and that it’s important to correct misinformation. Ask them what they’ve heard and go from there. Ages 11–13 (Tweens) What if my child mentions self-harm? How do I know if they’re joking? When should I worry? At this stage, parents should familiarize themselves with the warning signs and ways to help emotional regulation. Check online influences and peer pressure, but make sure your child knows they are loved and can receive help. Ages 14–18 (Teens) Parents of teens know that emotions are complicated and understanding them
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