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COMMUNICATION, from page 3

(San Rafael, CA), a global coaching and leadership develop- ment organization, says the ability to disagree effectively is critical in creating alignment and shaping direction. It’s also an important aspect of generating creative solutions. “When we can hold a staunch commitment to our own opin- ion and blend that with openness to another person’s diver- gent point of view, disagreement becomes a dynamic oppor- tunity to expand our thinking,” she says. Here are a few of Kimsey-House’s key strategies to foster collaboration through disagreement: ❚ ❚ Be curious. Being curious doesn’t mean you have to give up your point of view. Instead, curiosity demonstrates that you find the other person’s point of view valid even if it is differ- ent from yours. ❚ ❚ Listen deeply. Generally, we are so focused on results that we become preoccupied with the task rather than the person. This interferes with our ability to really listen deeply. It takes practice and discipline to shift our attention beyond our inter- nal dialogue and focus it firmly on another person. It’s helpful to imagine our listening as a spotlight. When we are listening to our own internal dialogue, that’s what gets illuminated. When we discipline ourselves to point the spotlight of our lis- tening toward another person, the impact can be tremendous. ❚ ❚ Seek to understand. True understanding reaches far beyond a cognitive understanding of someone’s opinion. Asking open-ended questions helps. What is important to them about an issue? What elements inform their perspective? ❚ ❚ Go for alignment rather than agreement. While people might argue forever on the particulars of an issue, there is usually a deeper place of alignment that lies underneath each person’s point of view. For example, they might discover that they both care deeply about innovation in the marketplace. Once they have found this alignment they can work together to generate a new solution, a third way, which is even better than the original vision of either person. Far beyond a mere compromise, this “third way” solution is born from the cre- ative tension of the original disagreement and uncovers oth- erwise hidden possibilities. “When we can disagree effectively, we can move forward in a partnership, generating new solutions and working to- gether for the highest good of all,” she says.

tight ship during kickoff meetings and formal status meet- ings, but you can never underestimate the importance of the informal relationship to developing solutions and be- coming a trusted advisor,” Maynor says. He suggests that open-ended questions are best, such as, “What does success look like for you?” or “What do you ex- pect to be the most challenging part of this project?” “I find that questions like these help me to learn things I might not think to ask,” he says. “They can also provide the responder with the latitude to share his or her personal ex- pectations or possibly reveal wants or needs that would not appear on an RFP.” “Our strategy for maintaining harmony is to demonstrate that everyone’s opinion is valued and make sure we hear from both pro-change and change-reluctant colleagues.” DEALING WITH CHANGE. Ted Lewis, a principal with GeoConcepts Engineering Inc. (Ashburn, VA), a 62-person geotechnical firm, talks about the importance of communication during periods of transition. “Change is stressful to everyone, but especially to individu- als set in their ways,” he says. “Our strategy for maintain- ing harmony is to demonstrate that everyone’s opinion is valued and make sure we hear from both pro-change and change-reluctant colleagues. We celebrate the changes that result in success as well as the decisions to not change which ended up benefiting the company. In any business, there are many opportunities to celebrate both.” Lewis explains that all changes should be justified by some type of metric – profitability, efficiency, or goodwill – that demonstrates its value. COLLABORATION THROUGH DISAGREEMENT. Karen Kimsey-House, president and co-founder of the Coaches Training Institute

THE ZWEIG LETTER February 22, 2016, ISSUE 1140

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