2021 MADDvocate

girlfriend, seeing the National Baseball Hall of Fame Museum, purchasing season tickets to Fenway Park, spending weeks boating at our favorite family spot, a small iconic island off the coast of Rhode Island. Then we traveled back to Scotland to complete our trip that got tragically disrupted - to the exact place where we got the horrific news. We created new family memories while exposing ourselves to more pain, vulnerability, and uncomfortableness so that we might feel closer to Kyle’s love. One step at a time while navigating life, we’ve worked at integrating and remembering Kyle with more love and joy than with extreme pain and sorrow. It doesn’t mean that we don’t feel intense grief and pain at certain moments, or with unexpected reminders of the loss on certain calendar dates throughout the year. We are learning that grief cannot keep us from living a full life or from loving others. Our lives are different now. Grief has become part of our new identity. Part of us died along with Kyle and part of him will always live on in us. We cannot change the death of our son, but we have the power to change what happens next. Volunteering for MADD has allowed our raw grief to be witnessed and allowed us to be with others who have also experienced the same violent crimes, helping us feel less alone and victimized. In the midst of our own grief, we strive to make changes in laws and policies (or the lack of them) that had contributed to Kyle’s death. Kyle had no choice, no voice and became powerless. But we have a choice,

a voice that empowers us to do what we can to prevent other families from experiencing the same kind of hell we live with every single day. Our extreme pain and grief will not be in vain. This doesn’t give our life purpose – it gives our grief purpose. MADD has given us a platform uniting with other families to join forces collectively to serve our community, helping to make change to end substance impaired driving.

If you have been impacted by a drunk or drugged driving crash, please connect with us on Facebook. MADD Victim Services hosts a private Victim Facebook Group where people who have been impacted by drunk or drugged driving crashes can connect

with other victims and survivors Click the Link below and ask to join! Get connected today!

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