Dr. Clyde M. Narramore, iduate of Columbia Uni versity, New York City, is chologist and Consultant in Research and Guidance h one of the largest school systems in America.
stand that God loves and cares for him. Be sure to take him to Sunday school-regularly. See that he has a part in daily fam ily d e v o t i o n s . These things will help restore your boy’s dignity and worthwhileness, and he will not he so jealous of his younger sister. Getting Rid of Fear Q. I am a man of 65, having been single for some years. I have never seen a psychiatrist nor have I con sulted one. I believe that the W ord of God is the final authority on hu man problems. However, since you are a Christian psychologist, I won der if you could suggest some help for me. I belong to a fine evangeli cal church where the gospel is preached but I receive no inspira tion from -it, and for many years I have been tormented b y fear. I would not consult m y pastor, although he is a very fine man, be cause he would just quote the Scriptures to me. and I know the Bible well, having studied it for many years. I cannot believe in God’s love for us, although I know it is a fact. Furthermore there has never been a moment o f God’s real ity, or of what Paul calls “ peace and jo y in believing.” T o m y knowledge, m y on ly sin is that of unbelief. But I do thank God for everything and praise Him sin cerely for His wonderful works. But that does not help. Has psychology any method of breaking through and giving one the power to appropriate the gift of salvation? If not, do not trouble to answer this letter. But if you or anyone should know of some way to change a mental process of des perate tormenting fear, I would be most thankful for such help. A. There are various reasons why
Jealous of Little Sister Q. M y four-year-old son has been very troublesome ever since his little sister was bom . I am sure it is caused by jealousy, but how can I cope with it? A. You cannot hope to overcome childish jealousy completely, but you can reduce it to a m inimum by tactful handling. Here are a few suggestions. First of all let your son help you with the routine care of the baby. It will make him feel grown up and im portant and he will feel that the baby is his, rather than his com petition. Secondly, you might plan some special treats, such as playing a game with the boy after supper, or taking him shopping while you leave the baby with a relative or a neighbor. Let him know that he is having these treats because he is growing up. I would avoid comparing him un favorably with his sister or with anyone else. Unfavorable compari sons cause children to hate those with whom they are compared and destroy their confidence in parents. Naturally your boy was no doubt the most important thing in your lives until the younger one was bom . A t that time he may have felt that he no longer “ counted.” I would suggest that you try to interest him in playing with the other boys and girls as much as possible. The more outside interests he has the less troublesome he will be. You should tell him several times a day how much you love him. As Christians there is an addi tional scriptural approach which is no doubt more important than all others. He needs to know that God l o v e s h i m a l s o . B y r e a d i n g him Bible stories he will under
you have not been able to achieve the peace and jo y in the Christian life that God has intended for you. Of course the starting place is al ways at Calvary. In other words, you realize, I am sure, that first of all we must accept Christ as our personal Saviour, asking forgive ness of sins. A fter we are saved we can expect real Christian growth if we read His W ord , pray and fel lowship with other believers. It seems reasonable to me that, ruling out any physical factors, you may have s u s t a i n e d a serious wound in your childhood — one or perhaps many unfortunate experi ences with your parents or others; a wound which m ay be a c t i n g (without your fu ll realization) to prevent you from devoting yourself unreservedly to our blessed Lord. This could be keeping you from reaping all of the wonderful spirit ual benefits that are rightfully yours, if you know H im as your Lord and Saviour. If such is the case, the problem m ay be resolved through a series of counseling ses sions with a professionally trained person in order to identify these past experiences, to reason them out, to pray about them and to expel them from your life. I do not minimize your attitude toward your pastor. However, I have great confidence in our evan gelical ministers. For the most part, they are fine, godly men who are sincerely interested in people. It is altogether possible that your m in ister or some other evangelical m in ister, w ill be able to help you a great deal. I would seriously sug gest you see one.
Readers are invited to submit questions to both Dr. Narramore and Dr. Talbot. Address ques tions to them c/o The King's Business, 558 So. Hope Street, Los Angeles 17, Calif.
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