Dear Sobe r Queens ,
My i nbox was a mi xed bag th i s week o f comp l e t e t r i umph , ut t e r deso l a t i on and ques t i ons a l though f ramed d i f f e r ent l y ac ros s mu l t i p l e ema i l s they we r e a l l pr e t t y much the same .
L i l y asked “Susan , wi l l I be s t i l l go i ng to mee t i ngs i n t en year s ' t ime ? Wi l l I s t i l l be r ead i ng qu i ck- l i t i n f i ve year s ' t ime ? Th i s seems l i ke so much work and I don ' t know i f I have the s tomach f or i t , wha t do you sugges t I do? ” Mar i a asked “ I have done the Ann i e Grace 30-days cour se , I have r ead the book and am par t o f an Ins t agram group o f women but f ee l exhaus t ed f rom r ead i ng , podcas t i ng , cha t t i ng a l l th i ngs sobe r – does th i s eve r s top? Does i t eve r ge t to the po i nt whe r e I j us t l i ve , and th i s ' th i ng ' i s no l onge r a l l - consumi ng o f my t ime and ene rgy? Ei ght months and count i ng . ” Wi l l you s t i l l be go i ng to a mee t i ng i n th i r t y year s ' t ime ? The answe r i s no , unl es s you choose to . Wi l l you s t i l l be r ead i ng sobe r qu i t - l i t i n twent y year ' s t ime ? The answe r i s who knows but pos s i b l y not unl es s you choose to . Wi l l I s t i l l be need i ng suppor t i n t en year s ' t ime ? The answe r i s who knows but pos s i b l y no unl es s you choose to . YES , i t ' s hard to g i ve i t up and day one can f ee l l i ke an out o f body expe r i ence . YES , you mus t put i n the work i n the f i r s t 90 days , 150 days , 200 days , 1000 days howeve r many days i t t akes to make i t s t i ck and i t i s NOT the same f or eve ryone . YES , you do need to s top romant i c i s i ng a drug tha t i s packaged beaut i fu l l y and has dragged you k i ck i ng and sc r eami ng to my i nbox .
He r name i s add i c t i on , not wi ne o c l ock and she has a t arge t on your back .
YES , you need to do the mi ndse t work to decons t ruc t soc i a l cond i t i on i ng i n your bra i n a t the out se t o f your j ourney . YES , you do need to say no to th i ngs a t the out se t o f your j ourney to prot ec t your f l edg l i ng sobr i e t y . My f ee l i ng i s why put your se l f i n the l i ne o f f i r e i n a bar or a r es t aurant i f you ar e not r eady to be the r e ? YES , you do need to mee t f ee l i ngs , to l e ra t e f ee l i ngs and s i t wi th f ee l i ngs . YES , you do need to l earn new cop i ng s t ra t eg i es . YES , you do need to bu i l d up a f abu l ous sobe r too l box tha t wi l l become your new bes t f r i end i n ear l y sobr i e t y . YES , you do need to unde r s t and the r e i s noth i ng NORMAL about put t i ng po i son i nto your body da i l y-n i ght l y-week l y . NOTHING. YES , you shou l d r ead da i l y ema i l s , r ead sobe r books and f i nd your own pa thway to r ecove ry d i scove ry l ean i ng on SOBER CONNECTIONS i n ear l y sobr i e t y . YES , you shou l d go to mee t i ngs or become par t o f a cour se- suppor t group i n ear l y sobr i e t y or e l se you run the r i sk o f f ee l i ng i so l a t ed , l os t and a l one .
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