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GROANING PAINS THE VIRTUES OF ‘DAD JOKES’
As some of you may have noticed, we’ve begun to run a “Dad Joke” segment in our newsletter. I’ve always enjoyed them, especially ones that get more groans than laughs. But I’d never heard the term “dad joke” until recently. My 15-year-old daughter Lexi taught me the term when she started referring to my go-to groaners as “dad jokes.” My response is always, “Of course they’re dad jokes — they’re jokes, and I’m a dad!” Now that Lexi has introduced me to what is apparently an entire genre of puns on the internet, one of our favorite pastimes is trading them back and forth. We’ll race each other to find the very best of the best. Whichever joke gets the most groans wins. Here are a few favorites:
When my eldest is visiting, we’ll often all stand around telling the best (and worst) jokes we’ve heard.
“When you have four kids, you learn very quickly how different siblings can be from one another. … But humor transcends these boundaries.”
But I try my best to spend one-on-one time with my kids, as well. Taking Lexi to her riding lessons makes it easy to fit in father-daughter time. Finding time to hang out with my second-eldest, Liam, is a little more difficult, since he’s a junior in high school with a busy athletic schedule. He’s 6-foot-1 and does track and field, so I’ve been trying to convince him to come to CrossFit with me. While he’s already fit, Liam is a teaser and a joker. I figured he’d relish the opportunity to see his “old man” grinding through challenging CrossFit workouts. Last year, for his birthday, we tackled the “Go Ape” obstacle course together. He was laughing; I was groaning. Considering that CrossFit is all about constantly varied functional movements performed at high intensity, this sounded right up his alley. Ironically, it’s looking like Lexi may be doing CrossFit with me before Liam does. We’ve been watching some CrossFit documentaries on Netflix, and apparently the sport is trendy among Icelandic women. Seeing these female athletes, like Katrín Davíðsdóttir and Sara Sigmundsdóttir, inspired my daughter to join a CrossFit kids program. Now I call her Lexi Briansdóttir. That may be her favorite groaner yet!
“Why do chicken coops only have two doors? If they had four, they’d be chicken sedans.”
“A termite walks into a bar and asks, ‘Is the bar tender here?’”
“How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.”
My daughter and I will go back and forth with these zingers just about anywhere. I was on a roll a few weeks back at her horseback riding lesson. I stood by the fence while Lexi and her trainer went through their exercises, burning through every horse-related dad joke I could muster. “Look at that steed,” I said pointing to a grazing mare. “She’s outstanding in her field!” That one was a real groaner.
N e x t D o o r Bu
Lexi and Spot after a lesson
All kidding aside, these jokes bring the whole family together. When you have four kids, you learn very quickly how different siblings can be from one another. They each have their own interests, hobbies, and personalities, especially when their ages run the gamut from a college junior to an eighth-grader. But humor transcends these boundaries.
To my fellow dad jokers out there, Happy Fathers’ Day.
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