Victim Services: Coping with Traumatic Death

Anger Anger is a common grief reaction. You may be surprised by the intensity of the anger you feel for the person who killed your loved one. You may

Expressing your feelings can help free the mind.

find that your anger is directed toward members of the legal system or hospital staff. Even if it doesn’t make sense, many people direct feelings of anger at a family member or friend, or even at themselves for not having prevented the unpre- ventable violent crime. You may even be angry at everything and everyone.

You may wish desperately that the person who killed your loved one would show some remorse and say “I’m sorry.” That probably won’t happen. Many offenders do not feel remorse although some are indeed sorry. However, their attorneys warn them not to make contact with the victim’s family because such contact can be considered an admission of guilt. The injustice of your loved one’s death, the deep hurt you feel, and the loss of future dreams may all add up to rage. Most of the things you think about doing must remain undone, like harming the offender. It is important not to act in a destructive manner when responding to your anger.

9

Made with FlippingBook. PDF to flipbook with ease