Professional March 2021

Confessions of a payroll manager - You won’t feel the benefit!

Another anonymous episode revealing the world of payroll featuring payroll avatar, Penelope Fortham (‘Penny’), who is payroll manager at the nation’s favourite biscuit makers Crumbitt’s Confections. I ’m already exhausted, and it’s only 8.30am! We’ve recently introduced online exercise classes for Crumbitt’s employees working from home, and I’m beginning to think the name was somewhat misleading. The ‘Get Up and Go – Wake Up Call’ classes have caused my ‘get up’ to go and now all I really want is to go back to bed. To be fair it’s probably got more to do with too many late nights: my just-one-more approach to episodes of any bingeworthy on-demand TV series is starting to rival that of an energy-drink-fuelled teenager. With a sleep-deprived me and a far-too-jolly-in- the-morning session leader wearing dayglo orange lycra bouncing around on a time- lagging zoom call, it’s been a challenge. Still, it’s been a genuine hit with a huge number of our employees. Even Mr Crumbitt has logged on a couple of times (although his camera mysteriously ‘goes wrong’ for long periods). What’s fantastic is that the idea came from inside our department: employee engagement officer (and ‘Strictly’ superfan) Stevie Stevenson not only came up with the idea but leads the sessions. Yes, it’s Stevie in the orange lycra; and, quite honestly, that’s not something I’m ever ready to see first thing in the morning but plenty of others are. The classes are part of a recent overhaul of employee benefits as much of our previous offer had become somewhat defunct over the past eleven months. How useful is cycle-to-work when the majority

are working from home, or cinema passes when cinemas are all closed? Some of our most popular benefits, spa days and relaxation treatments, have proven impossible to replicate over Zoom. Billie had a good crack at leading face yoga over a Teams call but no-one could tell if our cameras had frozen or people were just purposefully gurning. Hilarity ensued, so I guess there was an unintentional benefit as we all segued into laughter yoga. The initial brainstorm for new initiatives wasn’t exactly promising – discounted onesies, meals on wheels, and ‘pirates’ sessions which Jace explained is “when you bend and do stuff with your tummy to make you stronger”. My knowledge of sea- faring villains doesn’t include any kind of flexibility training on the Jolly Roger! After much deliberation, and arguments about whether pirates are good, bad or just misunderstood, we agreed to launch two new benefits: a salary sacrifice scheme to purchase technology benefits, and a new virtual exercise club hosted by Stevie, who fancied himself as the new Joe Wicks of the Crumbitt’s empire. As my skills do not lie in coordinating physical activity, I took the lead in identifying a supplier who could help employees purchase technology benefits for home-working and spread the cost by paying monthly through the payroll. What a great idea to help staff members with their financial cash flow (thanks to a fantastic joint brain wave from Tony and Evie). When I showed the catalogue of products to the team, Tony’s eyebrows got lost in his hairline and an almost beatific smile fixed on his face for the duration of the meeting. He is very much the tech addict of the group and he has thrived in

a home-working environment. (I suppose it didn’t hurt that he and Evie were living together throughout lockdown, so he had a colleague and friend with him at all times.) Tony is so well-known for his addiction to wireless devices that we’ve started teasing him about having a blue glow around him – yes, he’s an i:Tone. With both initiatives ready, we launched two weeks ago – and they’ve gone down a storm. The tech company sent a number of products which were (I would like to say ‘ably’, but probably more like ‘clumsily’) demonstrated by yours truly and (much more ably) by Tony, in a webinar. Staff even came on the call live with questions. I admit, I felt a little out of my depth talking about gigabytes and central processing units, but I could at least hold the products and smile somewhat winningly while Tony filled in the awkward pauses. All in all, it’s been a good week for payroll. Sometimes you have to adapt, and what works in one scenario doesn’t necessarily work in another. Acknowledging that and working together has meant the team now has some new (and popular) benefits to promote in these strange times. A timely reminder that adapting to change is what payroll does best, turning ideas into actions quickly and improving working life. Payroll certainly does impart life skills like no other profession. n The Editor: Any resemblance to any payroll manager or professional alive or dead, or any payroll department or organisation whether apparently or actually portrayed in this article is simply fortuitous.

| Professional in Payroll, Pensions and Reward | March 2021 | Issue 68 50

Made with FlippingBook - Online magazine maker