American Consequences - August 2020

drugs to the inflation rate, and allow consumers to buy prescription drugs from other countries. (Ukraine, maybe?) Joe will not only expand Medicaid eligibility, but (another whiff of totalitarianism) he’ll do so by “automatically enrolling... individuals when they interact with certain institutions (such as public schools) or other programs for low income populations.” Buying your groceries with a SNAP EBT card? Turn your head and cough. When my son was 10, he got a .22 for Christmas. Can Santa pass a background check? That North Pole address looks fishy – especially what with global warming filling the Arctic with swimming elves and reindeer. Joe will decriminalize cannabis, end “all incarceration for drug use alone” (no sharing!), eliminate mandatory minimum prison sentences, end the death penalty, and appoint the first African-American woman to Supreme Court (whether she wants to go there or not). Joe will pass the Equal Rights Amendment, “reverse the transgender military ban,” roll back “broad religious exemptions to existing nondiscrimination laws and policies,” and “restore transgender students’ access to sports, bathroom, and locker rooms in accordance with their gender identity.” (Where did the girl’s field hockey team get that 6’4” goalkeeper with a beard?)

Joe will institute public financing of elections, pass a “Constitutional amendment to entirely eliminate private dollars from our federal elections,” ban all contributions from lobbyists “to those who [sic] they lobby,” and provide matching funds for “federal candidates receiving small dollar donations.” Loved all of those $5 contributions you got, Bernie, here’s another fiver from the Treasury. Joe “will immediately do away with the Trump Administration’s draconian immigration policies” and “ensure asylum laws protect people fleeing persecution.” Though, I doubt this asylum will include people fleeing persecution from Joe’s threat to “hold corporate executives personally accountable – including jail time when merited” if they violate environmental regulations or labor laws. Joe will reinstate the assault-weapon ban (never mind that this is a law about how guns look , not what guns do). He’ll hold gun manufacturers liable for damages if one of the guns they made hurts someone. (Next, I guess, is holding cement mixers liable if I drop a concrete block on my foot.) He’ll make background checks mandatory not just for gun sales but for every kind of gun transfer. When my son was 10, he got a .22 for Christmas. Can Santa pass a background check? That North Pole address looks fishy – especially what with global warming filling the Arctic with swimming elves and reindeer. Also, Santa, “Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?” Joe promises to “notify law enforcement when a potential firearms purchaser fails a background check” –

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August 2020

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