L.A.F.F. LAW ADVOCACY FAMILY FINANCE A monthly newsletter providing your family insight about the law and finance (with an occasional dose of humor) from your friends and advocates at DuPont Wealth Solutions and the Law Offices of DuPont and Blumenstiel.
FRIENDS TO LOVERS HOW I MET MY VALENTINE
I am one of those lucky guys who can say with certainty that I married my best friend. It seems like getting to know someone and courting them often get intermingled at the outset of a relationship. Not so with Julia and me. We were friends, then confidants, and finally lovers over our many years of knowing one another. You see, I’ve known Julia since high school. We ran in the same circle of friends and saw each other basically every day of the week. We hung out a lot but dated other people. Things stayed platonic until well after we graduated. It was when we got to college that sparks began to fly.
“APPARENTLY, MY SUBCONSCIOUS PLANWAS TO GET JULIA TO FALL FOR ME BY PROCESS OF ELIMINATION. ENOUGH BAD DATES, AND HER OLD FRIEND FROM HIGH SCHOOL WOULD LOOK LIKE QUITE THE CHARMER, RIGHT?"
We both went to Ohio State and found ourselves involved in its active Greek life. That was when we became more than friends. Not lovers, mind you, but perhaps something just as valuable — drinking buddies. More times than I care to admit, we sat at college bars or the frat house porch and simply enjoyed our time together. Somewhere along the way, I started to develop feelings for her. This was awkward, because at about the same time, my friends were asking me to set them up with her.
good laugh when remembering my romantic “ingenuity.” Eventually, I came to my senses and cut out the middlemen. I asked her out during our junior year, and the rest is history.
Julia and I have now been happily married for over 27 years. The secret to our success is the
many years of friendship we were blessed with before becoming a couple. We got to see the good, the bad, and
This was one heck of a predicament for a young man. On one hand, the dates were mostly harmless (except for an ill-fated canoe trip that is a story for another day). On the other, I wanted to be that date. Like many men, I was be pretty clueless when it came to the dating and love rituals. Because, in youth, we feel the need to complicate everything, I chose to engage in subterfuge. Rather than coming out and asking Julia on a date, I set her up on dates with friends. There were no Prince Charmings among them. Most were fraternity brothers, next to some of whom I looked very impressive. Apparently, my subconscious plan was to get Julia to fall for me by process of elimination. Enough bad dates, and her old friend from high school would look like quite the charmer, right? We both have a
the ugly in one another as we grew into adulthood. Having those underlying roots of friendship allowed our marriage to blossom into something really special. Julia, I’m so glad you came into my life when you did. Very few people can say with such confidence that they married their best friend. Looking back over our life together, it’s hard to believe we could be anything but soulmates. Over the years, we’ve been friends, confidants, lovers, parents, and now co-workers. This year, will you be my valentine?
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