OLD PROBLEMS, NEW SOLUTIONS
HOW MARRIAGE COUNSELING CAN HELP SENIOR COUPLES
No one stays the same forever, so it makes sense that many couples have more difficulty relating to each other as they age. So-called “gray divorce” is rising, with 10% of all divorces occurring with couples 65 and older. It’s never too late to start again and be happy, but it also may not be too late to save a troubled relationship. Marriage counseling helps countless couples reconnect, communicate, and solve their differences. While many people still attach a stigma to marriage counseling, the practice is more common than ever among seniors. And there are a variety of issues counseling can help address. Many couples who have been married for a long time have ingrained negative patterns over decades. Changing them is possible, but it isn’t easy without outside help. People change significantly over 10, 20, or 30 years, leading to conflict and dissatisfaction. And it’s not uncommon to go through a relationship upheaval during an “empty nest” period. Other seniors are in second marriages, and while they’re often newer, they can come with their own sets of problems. After all, integrating two lives is never easy. And couples of all ages can struggle with routine marital problems like conflicts over money, a loss of romance, infidelity, regular arguments, and simply growing apart. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to be contemplating divorce or at each other’s throats to attend marriage counseling — though both
scenarios are good reasons to do so. Many people attend marriage counseling when they feel like their relationship is going through a slump, have trouble communicating, or struggle with one specific issue. Counseling also isn’t about proving who’s “wrong” or “right” but about helping you and your spouse work together better to address the problems in your life or marriage. If you think your marriage could benefit from counseling, talk to your spouse and look for therapists through friends and family, your doctor or faith leader, or even Google. Hopefully, your other half will be on board with the idea, but you can’t force them. A spouse who refuses to attend will be a roadblock, but you can still benefit from individual counseling. With a therapist, you can determine the best steps forward for your life and relationship.
3 Ways to Keep Your Young Drivers Safe IT’S TEEN DRIVING AWARENESS MONTH!
Eight teenagers die in motor vehicle crashes every day, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). That’s a scary statistic — especially as a parent of teenagers. Learning it didn’t surprise me, though, because I often see the aftermath of teen driving crashes in my office. Here in Virginia, 42 people died in crashes involving teen drivers in 2021. That begs the question: As a parent, what can you do to keep your kids safe? Assuming you’ve already explained why either drinking or texting while driving are terrible ideas, here are my recommendations as a parent and personal injury attorney. 1. Encourage your kids to take their time. It’s tempting to try and get from point A to point B as fast as possible. However, it’s safer to pause and think before hitting the gas. When teaching your kids to drive, encourage them to double-check the flow of traffic at busy intersections, four-way stops, and before turning or merging. Even if they’re legally in the right, they could fall victim to a reckless driver if they rush ahead. 2. Teach your kids the rules of the road. Make sure your kids understand the laws for signaling, turning, and right of way. I swear, no one in Virginia knows how four-way stops work these days! If they did, we’d all be a lot safer. You can visit DMV.Virgnia. gov/safety for teen driving resources. When you get to the page, click “Teen Driver Safety” on the left-hand side of the screen.
3. Tell your kids to ignore the knuckleheads. Folks here in Virginia have the terrible habit of yielding to other drivers when they’re not supposed to out of “kindness.” While this may be kind, it’s also dangerous! To keep your kids safe, teach them to follow the rules and ignore the knuckleheads — even if someone waves them on or honks at them. Ultimately, the best thing you can do is lead by example. If you model safe driving behavior for your kids, they’ll likely be good drivers, too! Hopefully, your kids stay as safe as mine have, but if anything happens, I’m here to help with the legal fallout. –Kevin Mottley
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