Dr. Clyde M . Narromore, duate of Colum bia Uni- »rsity, New York City, is chologist and Consultant i Research and Guidance i one of the largest hool systems in Am erica.
A. There are many reasons why children are dishonest and steal. Stealing may be an outlet for pres sures in a person’s life. He may feel that he has been unfairly treated and so he thinks stealing is the best way to “get back” at a person. Dishonest c h i l d r e n sometimes have “dishonest” parents. They may see parents do such things as purposely going through traffic sig nals or asking a child to answer the doorbell and prompting him to say that his father or mother is not there. It behooves all of us parents to take a close look at ourselves. It may be that the children which you mention do not know Christ as their personal Saviour. We are all bom with the Adamic nature — the tendency to sin. Un less children accept Christ and are bom again, their lives are controlled by their unregenerate n a t u r e s . After a person is saved he has a new nature. It’s natural then for him to be honest. “Therefore if any man be in Christ he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new” (2 Cor. 5: 17). Some children are Christians and yet they act dishonestly be cause their e n v i r o nm e n t (their home or their playmates) is not truly Christian. One of the best ways to handle boys and girls who are dishonest is to talk and reason with them. Leam the causes for their misbehavior. Of course, there is no substitute for spending time with a child. Boys and g i r l s who s e parents spend much time with them are seldom dishonest.
work. Parents should not shame a child unnecessarily or call atten tion to his mannerisms. It is impor tant that youngsters who have tics get plenty of rest and good physical care. Those who are underactive should be encouraged to participate more in group activities. People who h a v e s e v e r e t i c s would benefit from seeing a well- trained psychologist. If indicated, the psychologist will undoubtedly recommend medical help also. Some t y p e s of medication have been found to be especially beneficial. Love Talk Q. Should 14-year-old Chr i s t i an girls talk about love, petting and dating at such a young age? A. If they don’t talk about them then, when will they? It is normal for girls of 14 to talk about love. Why? Because they are no longer little children. They are adolescents. At this age most girls are physically quite well developed. In fact, many of them are capable of becoming mothers. New impulses and drives are adjusted through learning and experience. Later on they’ll talk about other things. If parents and teachers realize that “talking about love” is a nor mal part of growing up, they will “click” better with teen-agers. Undue conversation about love and sex may be a sign of malad justment. Such a person might benefit from wholesome instruction, spiritual help or professional psy chological service. Dishonesty Q. How do you handle dishonesty in children, especially when there is plenty of money available? Yet these children persist in taking what does not belong to them.
Tics Q. What causes tics? Is it insecur ity? How can you help a person to overcome such a habit? A. Tics, some t imes called habit spasms, are abrupt, purposeless and involuntary movements of certain muscles. The face and neck are most frequently affected; however, they may affect other parts of the body too. Common examples are a “nervous cough,” sniffing, swallow ing, clearing the throat, hiccuping, etc. Tics may be very mild or they may be quite severe. In some cases they are limited to eye blinking or stretching of the neck. More severe ones may cause serious grimacing, jerking movements of the shoulders or convulsive movements of the en tire body. Tics are most frequent in chil dren between the ages of eight to twelve years. T h e y a r e s e ldom found in youngsters under six years of age except transient eye-blinking which is common in preschool chil dren. Usually tics disappear during early adolescence. They are more common in boys than in girls. People who have tics commonly have emotional tensions, such as restlessness, self-consciousness, un due competition and sensitiveness. Tics are sometimes acquired in im itation of a parent, teacher or play mate. What should you do about them? They usually disappear without any special treatment. Severe tics, on the other hand, are more difficult to treat. You should try to uncover the physical causes if possible. An effort should be made to find out if and why the child has conflicts at home or at school. Avoid nagging, constant c r i t i c i sm , unfavorable comparisons with brothers and sis ters, and pressure for better school-
Readers are invited to subm it questions to both Dr. Narram ore and Dr. Talbot. Address ques tions to them c/o The Kina's Business, 558 So. Hope Street, Los Angeles 1/, C alif.
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FEBRU ARY 1957
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