Everyone seems to be in favor o f having family fun, but it is not always easy to attain it. It is far simpler for the individual members o f the family to have good times than it is for the group to have family fun. However, no matter how much each one may enjoy the individual activity, that is not family fun. In order for it to be family fun the members of the family must share in experiences which give happiness now and treasured memories in the future. It is true that some persons seem to have special skill in providing an ideal type o f activity in the home. Do not think that it ever comes without effort, however. In many homes the mother seems to take) the initiative in this regard; in others it is the father who plans for group recreation. The ideal would be to have each parent take an active part in all aspects o f family living. Whether they do it consciously or not, parents must understand the interests of each member of the group. In some homes reading aloud is enjoyed by the group. This is almost always true while the children are small. The bedtime story hour is well established in many homes. Sunday afternoon jour neys to missionary lands are looked forward to by children who have learned the delights of biogra phy and travel. The telling of jokes we have heard or read affords good opportunity to share relaxa tion and also to guarantee an understanding of the values of good clean humor as we learn to sort and appraise what we choose to repeat. If the family enjoys music, a whole area o f shared experience awaits us. It does not mean that every member must be a performer. The listener’s appreciation is as real a part of group experience as the audible performance. It is not intended that all family fun will in volve every member of the group. Sometimes the two who are doing the dishes will play some mental game which takes the child’s mind off the chore so that he says, “ One thing I like about our family is that we have so much fun while we do our work.” How different from the home in which a mother says, “ Get your mind on your work now. You can’t wipe that silver dry if you’re trying to think of a fruit that begins with q !” The little girl in that home is more apt to remember the work than the fun. And she is apt to dread her housework when she has a home of her own. It is not too difficult to learn the interests of the individual members o f our family. But how may we ever learn the moods? A difficult day at the office may leave a man in no mood for a romp with the children when they greet his homecoming with whoops of delight. Or in some homes it is the father who most enjoys the vigorous type o f activities. He may come home bursting with the proposal that they put their supper in a basket and take it out to the lake and have a game of ball afterwards.
How often does your
family enjoy an evening
of fun together?
M a k e - b e l ie v e is a very real world in the lives of little children, even more real than Russia, France, or Korea. I remember clearly the day on which my little son and I had played policeman, Constellation pilots, talking penguins, and society ladies at a tea party. Finally he said very seriously, “Now let’s just play that you are my mother, and I’m your little boy.” Thinking that this would be a very welcome role to assume, I said, “ Fine! And what shall we do?” “ Just have fun,” he answered. What constitutes fun is always a question. For the mother it might be to curl up at the end of the davenport and read a book which has been beckon ing for several days. For Jim it might be to dig worms for an anticipated fishing trip. Chuck may grab Daddy by the knees and beg to play “big bad wolf” under the dining room table. Joan may choose to sort through some old copies o f Seventeen look ing for a certain style she hopes to use in a frock she is designing in class. Rolf may wish to spread out his growing collection o f foreign stamps in order to sort out his duplicates. And he may choose to sort them on the very same dining room table which Grandma is trying to set for dinner and under which Chuck and Daddy are vigorously re enacting activities of the forest and prairie. Family fun is the tonic that helps to make home life fully satisfying. Although individual differ ences and concepts make it a term difficult to define, it always involves shared enjoyment. The warm and colorful memories which people carry from childhood into adult life could be classified as fam ily fun. Very frequently the pleasures shared with the family group are the experiences that we carry with us all through our lives. I say to my son, “Let’s run a maze o f string all through the house and make Chris follow it to find her birthday presents.” Why? Because my daddy had done that for me the year before he died. Or we write silly verses and hide each gift with directions for finding the next one—all o f them hidden in the most preposterous places our imagination can conceive. Why? Be cause Mother had done that once and it had been such wonderful fun. Or the directions are hidden in balloons and each has to be punctured before we can get the directions for the next gift.
35
JULY, 1966
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