King's Business - 1966-07

gether become the basis of an understanding which we share. It is so much easier for a child who has shared recreational interests with his parents to also share problems and difficulties. It was on an all-day hike up near Copper Harbor that Chris shared with her father her first religious doubts. I was at the cabin with the baby, but later they showed me the little bridge where they had rested while they talked everything over. Perhaps there is no better occasion in which to explain the plans and purposes of God as we understand them than when hiking together with our children in God’s great out-of-doors. Both parents must participate in ideal family relationships. We are told that in ancient times the responsibility for the mirth and laughter was as­ signed to a jester. Provided with cap and bells and a mock scepter, he was expected to furnish merri­ ment for the large households. Today we have no such custom, although many families rely on radio and television for a similar diversion. This requires careful selection unless we wish our homes to sink to the level of vaudeville shows. As will be discussed more fully later, the Christian family must wisely use whatever mediums of recreation they possess. But even if the television programs were whole­ some — and many of them are not — they provide the family with only a spectator type of activity. Participation insures much more wholesome and satisfying results. This raises the question of who is responsible for the family’s fun. We might answer that it is everyone’s responsibility. The f a t h e r and the mother, the brother and the sister, and each mem­ ber o f the household must sincerely believe that there is a value in having fun together if the best results are to be achieved. There seems to be deep in the human heart a desire for “ togetherness.” The small boy says, “Why doesn't anyone have time to play with me?” Grandfather wants someone to play checkers with him. Mother wants someone to sit down and visit with her. Each in his own way seems to desire the companionship of other human beings. This natural inclination should be utilized to build the family unit into a strong and loyal core. Aside from the loss of religious emphasis, perhaps no one factor has contributed to the breakdown of the modern home so largely as the tendency for every member of the family to go off in his own direction. The resulting loss of family solidarity may be the first step in family disinte­ gration. Let us believe that God has set the solitary in families for a purpose, and let us do everything within our power to preserve the strength and glory of family life. From GROWING WITH OUR CHILDREN by Gertrude Nystrom; used by permission, Moody Press, Moody Bible Institute of Chicago.

It is easier for a child who has shared recreational interests with his parents to also share problems and difficulties!

Mother may have been on her feet all day and may have planned a menu which cannot be quickly tossed into a basket. Not wanting to spoil the fun, however, she “ puts on her thinking cap,” and re­ vises the menu. The picnic is acclaimed a great suc­ cess ; then Jack says, “Oh, come on, Mom, don’t you feel well ? Don’t you want to play ball ?” Dad looks at Mother and suddenly realizes that she’s not as young as she used to be. So they decide to play ball without her while she puts away the remains of the picnic. Even though she is dead-tired and longs for a refreshing bath and cool, smooth sheets, she is happy to have her family near her and is glad that she stifled the impulse to say, “ Oh, no, Jack, not a picnic tonight / ” Plans for family fun must take into considera­ tion each member o f the family. Very often a father and adolescent son may choose activities which leave out the younger brothers and sisters. Or a mother may thoughtlessly channel plans in the direction of her own interests. A great deal o f sel­ fishness is unconscious. In fact, all of our conduct tends to be selfish except as we make a conscious effort to look at things from other viewpoints. It is impossible even under the most ideal circumstances to have all our family activity equally enjoyable to every member of the group. The parents must accept the responsibility, however, o f seeing that a balance is achieved. One o f my happiest memories was a long hike which my young son and I took cross-country, in which he had to draw a map of an uncharted two-mile hike for a Christian Service Brigade badge. The wind was raw on that chilly March day. We had warm wraps and heavy galoshes. I carried the lunch because he was draw­ ing the map as we went along. As we slushed through a small creek at the outlet from the lake, he came over and squeezed my hand and with spar­ kling eyes said, “ Isn’t this fun, Mother! Aren’t you glad we came today?” With children there can be no hypocrisy, and no half-hearted enthusiasm. We must not only be enjoying ourselves, but we must be thoroughly enjoying ourselves. If a child is to be happy he must feel assured that we, too, are shar­ ing his happiness. Although family fun is a justifiable end in it­ self, it also has broader values. The intimacy and loyalty that develop as we have our good times to­

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THE KIN G 'S BUSINESS

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