YOU AND YOUR ROOMMATE This section was prepared to assist roommates in learning about one another so they may be able to live together harmoniously. The variety of topics attempts to provide a broad cross-section of the potential encounters you will have when sharing living space. Your roommate needs to know your general personal background, your attitude and emotions, your values (feelings, attitudes, opinions), and personal preference. The term “sharing” is most important here because residence hall living requires a concept of cooperation, whether it is with your roommate or with other residents on your floor. You can begin with a willingness to share some of yourself with your roommate. Open and honest communication usually ensures a satisfactory roommate relationship. The questions outlined below are provided to help you get started. Take each question separately—be open, be honest, and be complete. If you have difficulty talking about an issue or subject, make note of it and tell your roommate that you would like to come back to it. PERSONAL BACKGROUND: You should start by using the questions below to give your roommate some basic information about yourself—where you grew up, information about your schooling, family, hobbies, interests, etc. Try to offer more than “I’m from Renton and I’m interested in the outdoors.” Members of my family include: I am glad to be away from home because: I was not glad to leave home because: I chose Central Washington University because: PERSONAL VALUES: In this section, you are being challenged to communicate—try and share ideas, issues, and values. Learn what you should know about each other. This is the most crucial portion of the you and your roommate section, because it will help establish the basis for your living arrangements. How do I want our room to be utilized? I expect our room to be… Who will clean what and when? How about friends and visitors in our room? My feelings about my personal belongings are… My feelings about smoking are… Grades and studying are… I prefer to study… ATTITUDES AND EMOTIONS: Attitudes and emotions (our feelings and how we express them) are an important part of us. We convey feelings both verbally and non- verbally. This portion of you and your roommate encourages you to clarify the emotions and attitudes that you express. I am generally (reserved/outgoing/etc.)… My pet peeves are… When I am: …angry, I generally… …frustrated, I generally… …sad, I generally… …concerned, I generally…
TEMPERATURE OF ROOM: Do you like the room to be hotter or cooler? When is it okay to have the windows open? If you want to change the temperature, will you discuss it with your roommate first? SLEEPING ARRANGEMENTS: When do you usually go to bed? How much sleep is important for you to have? Can you sleep with the light on? With music or the TV on? What time will you wake up in the morning? How do you feel about overnight guests? When is it okay to have guests spend the night? How will you discuss this with your roommate if an issue arises? QUIET AND STUDY TIME: How do you feel about taking naps in the room? If you were making too much noise, how would you like your roommate to discuss this with you? When do you study? Is it OK to play music or have the TV on while you study? Would you prefer to have set study times? When you are studying with a group, is it alright to be in the room? COMMUNICATION: What do you need when you are stressed or upset? If there is a problem between you and your roommate, how will you handle it? Is there anything else you want your roommate to know about you? CLEANING: How neat and clean do you like things to be? Who will vacuum, dust, take out the trash and recycling, etc? Do you prefer to have special assignments or a cleaning schedule? How often will these things be done? PERSONAL PROPERTY? What items can be shared and which may not? Do you mind if people use your TV, computer, game console, etc? Do you want to be asked before things are borrowed? VISITORS: Are there times when it could be preferred that visitors not be invited to visit the room? How do you feel about visitors of the opposite sex? How do you feel about your roommate’s visitors using your belongings? OUR REACTIONS TO EACH OTHER: Last but not least, you are at the point of drawing some conclusions and identifying positive and negative factors in your living situation with your roommate. Some things that I have learned from this discussion are… An important difference between us is… And we will work on this by… My roommate and I agree that we will do the following, if conflict occurs between us… ROOMMATE AGREEMENT Successful roommates stick things out by helping one another through the good and the bad times. Don’t quit on your roommate. Communication is key in any relationship—especially with your new roommate! Developing a positive relationship with your roommate is a process. When you move into your residence hall, you will be provided with an online roommate agreement that will be found under your MyHousing account. We provide this agreement to you as a way to begin the process. As you write your agreement, try to be as specific as possible.
…excited, I generally… …happy, I generally… It is (easy/hard) to talk about my feelings. Why?
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