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O ctober 2023 T he P ower of P erspective
Transformative Lessons I Learned From Van Gogh I’m not much of an art buff; I consider myself much more of a music guy. But if pressed, I’d say I have a soft spot for French painters Claude Monet or Albert Fernand-Renault. However, the famous Dutch impressionist Vincent van Gogh never had much impact. I would look at his paintings in books, see a lot of brushstrokes, and not understand why everyone else was so impressed.
quarters of Van Gogh’s work. Seeing it all in one place and understanding the circumstances under which he painted changed my views.
Van Gogh painted an extraordinary number of self-portraits. You might assume he was self-obsessed, but he painted himself because he couldn’t afford to hire a model. These paintings were essentially experiments in new ways of using colors and how combining them with strokes could create an image. The trouble is that I’m colorblind. That may be why visual art generally isn’t my favorite medium. People often tell me how sad it must be not seeing the leaves change each autumn, but it doesn’t bother me because I don’t know what I’m missing. Reading the text alongside the paintings helped me understand why Van Gogh may not have resonated with me before. At the same time that I had to accept I couldn’t see his work the same way as everyone else, I realized Van Gogh was a revolutionary who had an amazing gift for perception. I couldn’t help but appreciate how he had to look at his canvas so wildly differently from every other artist before him. While my view of Van Gogh’s work remains biologically limited, I felt unexpectedly fascinated and enchanted by it. The visuals themselves may have been less impactful than his overall mindset; he had to step outside preconceived ways of painting and discover something new. I began to wonder how often we all have the opportunity to approach something familiar in a different way. Van Gogh arguably changed the world with his use of color and the feelings he evoked. When can each of us be that creative and transformative? How can we find radically new ways to combine things and make them vibrant? The idea suggests many possibilities we often don’t allow ourselves to consider, and it’s a powerfully optimistic message. If we’re willing, it can act as an inspiration for how we approach the world. We all have the power to metaphorically use new strokes and bring our visions to life in full color — the only ones holding us back are ourselves.
But I am a big believer in the wisdom of the ages. If society has long considered a piece of art a classic, we owe it to ourselves to engage with it. Even if it doesn’t resonate with us, we gain something from understanding why it has stood the test of time. So, when I had the opportunity to visit the Van Gogh Museum during a trip to Amsterdam this summer, I decided to take it. The experience was not what I expected. Viewing a painting in a book differs from seeing it in person, and studying an isolated work pales in comparison to experiencing an extensive, contextualized collection together. The museum holds roughly three-
–Michael Manely
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T ried - and -T rue M ethods to B reak Y our K ids ’ S creen A ddiction
Lay down the law. Once you decide on time limits, implement them ruthlessly. You can set most tablets to automatically turn off after they’ve been viewed for a set amount of time each day. Once time is up, it’s up — and using someone else’s tablet is unallowed. Furthermore, ask questions about what your kids are viewing and playing and use strict parental controls to ensure they only access age-appropriate content. Create screen-free zones. Specific times and places should always be off-limits for screens. A prevalent rule involves no screens and food together; eating should be mindful, and dinner should be family time. Experts also recommend no devices for one hour before bed. You might also consider requiring your kids to look away from screens and make eye contact while talking to someone. Other decrees could include tablets not leaving the car once you arrive at a destination or no devices while guests visit. Be a good role model. Yes, you’re the parent, and no one can tell you how much time to spend on your phone. But children quickly adopt what they see. When the adults around them are always glued to different electronic devices, it makes the habit seem even more attractive. Reducing screen time will benefit your health and ability to connect with your family. Limiting your use in front of your kids specifically will show them you practice what you preach.
Every parent knows they should limit their
children’s screen time, but accomplishing it is far easier said than done. Kids love their devices as much as adults and would happily spend hours glued to their electronics if we let them. Fortunately, we’ve discovered some tried-and- true methods for parents to prevent bad habits.
Establish time limits. Every parent must determine the right amount of screen time for their kids, but it helps to know what experts recommend. The American Academy of Pediatrics says screen time should be strictly limited to video calls for children under 18 months, children 18 to 24 months should only watch high-quality programming with an adult, and kids aged 2 to 5 should watch no more than one hour daily. After that, the science gets a bit fuzzier, but most experts agree that less is best.
A ttorney J essy D evins O ffers E mpathy and E mpowerment
Jessy Devins traces her law career back to how she was raised. “I’m a child of Mexican immigrants,” she says, “and my parents always instilled the value of education and work ethic in me.” Since she believed in education, she considered becoming an English teacher, but a literature instructor suggested a different path. “I loved reading,” Jessy says, “and at the core of law is reading comprehension and being a people person.” While she hadn’t considered a career in law before, “the more I looked into it, the more I loved it,” she remembers. “I felt my skills fit really well — and all parents are proud to say their kid is a lawyer!” After passing the bar in 2021, Jessy began working at a corporate firm but “felt detached from people.” She decided to pivot to family law in 2023. “I love being able to help people through such a monumental change in their lives and explaining the law to them when they’re so lost,” she says. “I can’t fix everything for them, but I can at least help them understand what’s going on and give them a better idea of what will happen.”
Jasper and a cat named Toast. As an area native and Spanish speaker, she particularly enjoys assisting members of the local Latino community. “One thing I love about The Manely Firm is how diverse we are,” she says. “I jumped at the chance to help in this area. It’s very personal to me, and this firm is a great place to turn if someone has a language or cultural barrier.” She also notes the supportive staff at the office. “I really enjoy how much mentorship and training The Manely Firm invests in their attorneys,” she says. “They’re always available for questions, and every attorney, paralegal, receptionist, and client care coordinator has been nothing but friendly, warm, and inviting.” But her favorite part of this work is connecting with her clients. “I always tell people in consultations, ‘You are not alone. I know you feel alone, but you’re not,’” she says. Getting to the end of a case is a particular reward. “I enjoy shaking someone’s hand, sending them a closing letter, and saying this is over. It’s such a relief to move forward,” she adds, “and I’ve always wanted to help people.”
Jessy was born and raised in Gwinnett, and she and her husband live in Lilburn with a dog named
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NEW S peaker S eries !
No one wants to feel afraid to be themselves, but the power struggles we enter often have that effect. In “The Go-Giver Marriage,” authors John David Mann and Ana Gabriel Mann point to this dynamic as a problem in relationships of all types. One of their secrets to a happy relationship is “allowing” the other person to be who they are with an open heart. Have you ever felt like someone goes out of their way to criticize you? It could be a partner who hates how you load the dishwasher, a parent who always has a critical word about your wardrobe, or a boss who complains about inconsequential details. Allowing encourages us to understand when things don’t matter and to let them go. Of course, this principle has limits. Allowing someone to be themselves is not the same as allowing them to walk all over you. Everyone should maintain boundaries and expect others to treat them with respect. However, restrictions are inevitable in some cases. For example, while The Manely Firm tries to allow its employees to work how they see fit, staff must follow the letter of the law, meet key performance indicators, and celebrate the core values. The same is true in co-parenting. Allowing your ex to harm your child or refuse to pay child support is off the table. But most of your and your ex’s parenting differences won’t hurt anyone. Effective co-parents must learn to accept and allow that individuality and remember that doing something differently is not the same as doing it incorrectly. As another example, consider a parent who hates their adult child’s hair color or tattoos. If they decide to be critical, it probably won’t change the child’s mind — but it will cause the child to pull away from the relationship. A parent who allows that same child to make their own decisions and respects their autonomy will build love and trust. While this may be the trickiest “secret” in the Manns’ book, the goal is to allow as much as possible. Shelia Manely recently shared the best parenting advice she ever received: “Don’t say no unless you have a really good cause.” Applying that same strategy to all relationships can improve how we relate to each other and transform our lives. How Ending Power Struggles Improves Our Lives T he A rt of A llowing
Yep, that’s what we do! The Manely Firm’s coveted Speaker Series continues, available to current clients only every Wednesday evening at 8 p.m. The series has been a HUGE success and we are thrilled to offer this valuable service to our clients. Check out our list of upcoming speakers below. All current clients are welcome and encouraged to join us every Wednesday evening as we continue to provide our clients with helpful resources to reach their very best tomorrow. If you are a current client and did not receive an email invitation to join, please call our office at 770-421-0808 and ask for Vivian Pascual for information on registration. Don’t miss it! “I needed this. I was struggling today and now I feel so empowered.” -TMF Client Speaker Series Attendee
Sept. 27- William King: Adoptions
Oct. 4- Jennifer Herold: Creator of Your Own Life and Destiny
Oct. 11- Cherish De la Cruz: Top Five Mistakes Families Facing Conflict Make When Planning Their Estate
Oct. 18- Michael Manely: Family Law — What Impacts Our Clients Most
Oct. 25- John and Ana Mann: Five Secrets to a Lasting Relationship
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211 Roswell St. NE Marietta, GA 30060 (866) 687-8561 www.allfamilylaw.com
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How Van Gogh’s Art Reshaped Michael’s Perception
Time’s Up! How to Implement Effective Screen Time Limits for Kids How Attorney Jessy Devins Found Her Calling
How ‘Allowing’ Can Transform Your Relationships NEW Speaker Series!
Personalized Vacations With AI
AI-E nhanced T ravel : Y our S ecret to the P erfect I tinerary
The feeling of excitement for an upcoming vacation can quickly turn into one of stress. After you purchase your ticket or plan your travel, you may feel so burnt out that scheduling day-to-day activities for said vacation feels impossible. Thankfully, helping you create an itinerary is where AI thrives. So, how do you use AI to help you plan a trip? The first step is to craft a prompt that will get the best response possible. To do that, ask your preferred AI platform questions in your native language. AI understands many languages, and your grammar and syntax when asking questions matter when looking for perfect results. The more grammatically accurate your sentence is, the more artificial intelligence can help you. Next, you need to be as specific as possible. Include all relevant information about your travel party when asking it to make plans for you, including if there are any kids, elderly travelers, pets, dietary restrictions,
interests, or priorities because those factors will impact the results it gives you.
You should also tell the AI software when it misunderstands you or gives you results that don’t match what you want. AI, like ChatGPT, uses large language models (LLMs) to learn from the person interacting with it, so the back-and-forth of providing feedback helps it pinpoint your specific interests to give you better information. For example, you can provide this prompt: “Make me a travel itinerary for seven days in Rome with activities in less crowded areas that are accessible to elderly travelers.” Finally, double-check any of the information AI gives you. Most platforms can only access information available before 2021, so certain attractions, restaurants, parks, or other itinerary items may not exist anymore.
Want to give AI travel a go? ChatGPT isn’t the only site you can use to plan your itinerary! You can try any one of the following AI software specifically created for travel: • Tripnotes.ai • RoamAround.ai • Curiosio.com
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