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But, as a family, we don’t really seem to be cut out for that. We don’t have the right mindset. I understand that “prepping” starts with digging a large hole in the yard that will contain a defensible underground shelter stocked with food and water and supplied with a chemical toilet. “EWWWW! A chemical toilet ?! Gross!” says eldest daughter Muffin. “I’m locking myself in my bedroom.” And any prepper who proposes digging a large hole in the yard is not married to a wife who just paid the landscaping contractor $10,000 for new hedges, ornamental shrubs, herbaceous borders, and foundation plantings. Then there’s stocking up on food. If I put “200 cans of Chef Boyardee beef ravioli” on the shopping list, my wife just assumes I’ve been drinking and crosses it off. And once we’re in the defensible underground shelter, I believe we’re supposed to shoot our neighbors when they try to get in there with us. But we live way out in the country and don’t have many neighbors. Our situation is hopeless. “What should we do?” I ask my family. My wife says, “I know what you should do – knock it off with the daydreaming and get back to work. Go write something.” Point taken. But... still... It wouldn’t be long before we were reduced to eating... I look at our three plump, over-nourished dogs... Is it just my imagination, or are the dogs looking at plump, over-nourished me?
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