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By Turney Duff
random out of a hat, had to deliver a “State of the Union” address for the company they created. Since there were more than a hundred kids in the class, Jesse liked his chances. He settled into his usual seat near the back row of the large lecture hall. The professor handed out the hat and instructed each student to write down their name on a piece of paper, pop it in, and then pass it. That’s when Jesse got a brilliant idea – he wrote down “Ronnie” instead of his own name. Ronnie was a clown who sat in the same back row... He made everyone within a 10-foot radius of him miserable. And he’d been doing it for four years. Jesse wrote down “Ronnie” on as many scraps of paper as he could until the hat finally reached his desk. He stuffed 20 ballots in. There was no chance the professor wouldn’t pull Ronnie’s name. And no chance that Ronnie had prepared. Jesse was grinning in anticipation when the hat made its way back to the professor... It was going to be fun to watch Ronnie squirm up there. The professor reached his hand in, pulled out the first name, and unfolded the paper. “Jesse Itzler,” the professor said. “Can you please come up to the front?” Jesse looked down the row to see Ronnie laughing uncontrollably. That jag-off must have done the same thing to him.
As Jesse descended down the steep steps of the lecture hall, he tried to prepare his pitch. He had to come up with something – fast. When he got to the front of the room, the professor stepped aside to give him the floor. He stood there silent for a moment, looking out at his expecting classmates. “Hugs and kisses in every bite,” Jesse started. “Aunt Franny’s Brownies.” From there he launched into his pitch. He was winging it the best he could, but being in front of an audience felt natural to him. He liked it. “ And I can promise you that it’s the best tasting brownie you’ll ever eat .” He was thirty seconds into his pitch when... “Stop,” the professor said. “Just stop.”
"IF YOU WANT TO BE A BROWNIE THEN YOU HAVE TO BE BETTER – DIFFERENT. A NEW, BETTER BROWNIE.”
American Consequences | 21
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