T E X A R K A N A M A G A Z I N E
not share DNA, but were siblings in every other way. Despite hating school, he still did well at it, but the only diversity he saw was in himself! “Even at a young age, I felt like the odd man out,” he said. “I never felt I belonged and knew that I was somehow exceptional. Of course, it would take years for me to know how I was unique, but I was unique, nonetheless. I doubt my story differs much from thousands of others, but today I know I have a voice that can help others know they are not alone.” Because Richard felt chronically different, he recalls escaping into fantasies, dreaming of being anyone other than who he was. I was a freshman in high school when the first drop of alcohol touched my tongue. I remember a tingle at the back of my throat when I swallowed. No gagging. No burning. The liquor slowly made its way down. Instant alleviation. A wave of instant gratification came over me. For a teen that always felt alienated, with alcohol, I did not care what people thought of me. I’ll be so bold as to say I didn’t even care what I thought about me. My biggest fear, which had been not being accepted, became a fleeting thought. The pool of emotion I felt with my first drunk experience became quite a fervor of mine throughout my teens, lingering to plague my twenties as well.” “Like any budding alcoholic would,” Richard continued, “I sustained.” Being a senior in high school, what should have been good times hanging out with friends became an excuse to “drown my demons.” He recalls going to a party shortly before graduation, intending to drink a few to “fit in;” instead, he drank everything in sight. This was the first of many blackout episodes. “You would think being violently hung over would be a wake-up call,” he said, “but no!” His only thought was “when do I get to do that again?” After graduation, Richard took a job at a new hotel opening in town. He did well at the front desk there, but in September 2008, he needed some dental work. He was prescribed narcotic pain medication and took it as directed, but soon, his addictive personality proved problematic when “as prescribed” turned in to “I wonder what two will do?” This began the downward spiral of three, four, five and even ten pills at a time. “I was hooked,” Richard shared, “but
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H E A L T H & W E L L N E S S
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