Y OU can look in the dictionary yourself and find that love is “a feeling of strong 'personal at tachment, strong liking, fondness, tender and passionate affection for one of the opposite sex,” etc., etc. All of which is no doubt true, but we could never be satisfied with just this definition. You see, we must empha size here that love came from God. In fact, in a very mysterious and wonderful way, God Himself is love (1 John 4 :7, 8). So the only one really capable of defining love is God. And any definition which leaves God out isn’t really the genuine article. The world defines love very differ ently (1 John 2:15-17). Love to many means merely the gratification of sensuous desire or physical pleasure. The average untaught young person conceives of love in terms of passion ate kisses, promiscuous fondling or perhaps even stolen affection slightly on the unholy side. The reason is that some have received their education about love from the lurid love maga zines or the even more sensational moving pictures. This isn’t really love at all—mostly it’s just plain physical lust. You’ll never understand the true character of love until you see that God places our love alongside His. For instance in one place He points out that as He so loved (1 John 4:11) us, we ought to love one another. And in another place an entire chapter (1 Cor. 13) is devoted to a delineation of love’s sterling qualities. Yet the greatest unveiling of love’s true char acter is to be found in the person of Christ Himself. He is love incarnate. His life is the personification of all that love is (1 John 4:10). This may all be just Greek to you until you nail down firmly in your thinking that the love we’re talking about is high, noble, unselfish, and self-sacrificing. Genuine love is always clean love. It’s pure, generous, long- suffering, faithful. You can no more divorce real love from these qualities than teach mud turtles to fly. And your Christian life just won’t work on any other principle. It’s like trying to run your car on catsup or maple syrup. It wasn’t made for that. You can easily see that true love has lofty (John 14:15) standards. But let me assure you that love like this brings millions of dividends in true pleasure (Prov. 5:18) and enduring satisfac tion, and some fun, too (Cant. 1 :2 ). Love Is Quite Normal Don’t ever be afraid of love, for it’s quite normal. I don’t want you to think for a moment that because Page Ten
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By William W . Orr, D .D . Second in a Series of Articles on the Problems of Young People
Christian love has an honest back bone you can’t attain to it. Believe me, it’s perfectly right, proper and praiseworthy to like many friends, to love a particular someone, to marry, to have a dozen children, and to live happily (or at least merrily) ever after. You see, God has bound up the matter of making the world (Gen. 2:24) go round with the force we call love. Love and procreation (Eccl. 9 :9) love and life go hand in hand simply because God has so willed it. We must love because we’re made that way. Our lives are not complete until we do. Our physical mechanism, our mental health, our spiritual well-being are all tied into this matter of love. You don’t have to look very far to find people who are hopelessly neurotic simply be cause they’re starved for affection. On the other hand, while we’re affirming the normality of love, let us add that there’s real danger in the abuse of this God-given force. When love gets out of hand, or jumps its track, then there’s mighty serious trouble to pay. The same things may be said of other things in life. For instance, the body is made for food, and eating is a most delightful and nourishing exercise. But overeating, or bad gastronomic habits could bring a chain of reactions that might cost one’s life. Exercise, too, is good. But overexertion could irreparably dam age the body’s muscular structure. Our eyes are unbelievably strong, but don’t start staring at the sun with them. Our voices can stand a lot of abuse, but screaming to high heaven might ruin them forever. You see, all of life’s forces have boundaries of good sense.
Love, too, is quite normal, useful and a source of unparalleled delight (Cant. 4:10) within the boundaries a loving God has made. But don’t let love get out of hand, and jump the boundaries. God wants us to enjoy life to the full. But isn’t it the part of true wisdom to follow (1 John 4:11) God’s rules ? Especially when the rules are designed for our highest good? Have Many Friends Don’t misunderstand me. We don’t mean many intimate, close friends; that’s an impossibility. In life there can only be one who is the friend. Rather, what we mean is to let your life be enriched with many friends (Prov. 17:17) of the ordinary garden variety. You know, school chums, church pals, friends on the job. It’s good advice not to get too serious with any one friend until about a score of years have rolled by. Then you’re beginning to get some good sense. Now, how to make friends? Well, that isn’t easy. An old Book puts it this way: to have friends one must show himself friendly (Prov. 18:24). Which means you have to encourage friendships. You must think of the things which concern their lives, work for their welfare, put your interests last. But there are rich rewards for this. True friends constitute some of the real riches (Prov. 27:9) of life. Boys and girls were made for each other. It’s a fine thing to encourage parties, socials, sings, hikes, picnics. Enter into these things with all your heart. Have fun with friends. God is never desirous that we should shut ourselves up as in a monastery. We’re not to be hermits or recluses. It’s as natural as breathing to know and like many friends. Of course, always in T H E K I N G ' S B U S I N E S S
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