Atlanta Divorce Law Group - April 2022

Should You Tell Your Kids the Truth? THE RIGHT WAY TO BE HONEST

April 2022

When a new client comes to our firm with questions about divorce, one thing always comes up in our strategy sessions: “How do I tell my family about this?” It’s a tough question, and it leads to a lot of others that are equally difficult. How do you break the news to your partner that you want a divorce? How do you tell your parents or kids that your marriage is ending? Should you tell them why it’s ending? I’m an advocate for honesty. I think you should tell your family and friends the truth about your divorce and other important changes in your life. However, there’s a right and wrong way to be honest. On one hand, you have brutal honesty:

about communication and relationships by authors like Alison Armstrong and Brené Brown. Being candid with someone is still being honest, but in a more productive and considerate way. Brené Brown suggests that before you say something, you should ask yourself, “Is this kind? Is it true? Is it helpful?” Kind doesn’t necessarily mean “nice.” The information doesn’t have to make the other person feel good, but it should fill in the blanks and help them move forward. Candor turns a phrase like “I want a divorce because I don’t love you and I’ve never been happy” into “I don’t feel like we can give each other what we need in this relationship. I think we would both be better off if we separated.” Similarly, “I’m divorcing your mom because she’s a terrible person who cheated on me” becomes “Your mom and I are no longer together, but I’ll do everything in my power to make this an easy process for you, and I love you very much.” Candor is particularly important when you’re dealing with kids. Ask yourself, “Will this information be useful to my child? Will it help them avoid confusion, be resilient, and feel safe?” If not, keep those truths to yourself. If you want to read more about how to have honest, productive conversations — not just during divorce, but in all areas of life — check out the books “The Culture Code: The Secrets of Highly Successful Groups” and “Crucial Conversations.”

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“I want a divorce because I don’t love you and I’ve never been happy.”

“I’m divorcing your mom because she’s a terrible person who cheated on me.”

These are the things people say when they’ve taken up the mantle, “I’m just going to be honest, no matter what.” That justifies saying all kinds of horrible things in the name of self-expression. More often than not, we use brutal honesty as an excuse to be mean, cruel, and hurtful to other people. It’s a way to dump the emotional baggage we don’t want to carry on someone else. To be fair, brutal honesty does get the job done. But it’s not the best way to break a piece of news. “Brené Brown suggests that before you say something, you should ask yourself, ‘Is this kind? Is it true? Is it helpful?’”

–Sara Khaki

Our firm is supporting children caught up in the Russia-Ukraine War. We donated to UNICEF, just like we’ve done in the past to help children in Afghanistan and Iraq. To join us, visit UNICEF.org and click “Donate.” Join Us in Donating for Ukraine!

On the other hand, you have candor. The difference hit me after I started reading books

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WITH HELP FROM THESE VIRTUAL EVENTS FIND HAPPINESS FOR YOU AND YOUR KIDS

HAPPILY EVER AFTER DIVORCE SUPPORT GROUP MEETING (VIRTUAL SUPPORT GROUP) When: Saturday, April 16, at 6:30 p.m. Register: AtlantaDivorceLawGroup.

Our complimentary divorce support groups and seminars are available online! Register for these upcoming events to gain knowledge, resources, and emotional support that will help you feel empowered while you go through major life changes. CHILD CUSTODY (COMPLIMENTARYWEBINAR) When: Wednesday, April 6, at 6:30 p.m. Register: AtlantaDivorceLawGroup.com/Webinars/Child-Custody The writer Oscar Wilde once wrote, “The best way to make children good is to make them happy.” With school, friends, and hormones in the way, this is a monumental task for parents at the best of times. But it feels particularly challenging during a divorce and custody battle. Fortunately, deciding custody doesn’t need to be a nightmare for your family. You can come to an agreement that works for you and your children — and we can show you how to do it. In our free child custody webinar, our team will walk you through different types of custody and how it’s decided in court. We’ll also talk about protecting the health and happiness of your kids and finding a custody schedule that works for you.

com/Happily-Ever-After- Divorce-Support-Group

Speaking of happiness, you deserve it as much as your children do! If you still feel lost, confused, and full of questions about your

divorce, our support group may be the port in the storm you need. It’s led by experienced marriage and family therapist Kathleen Shack of Family Solutions Counseling LLC and filled with people who are going through the same divorce struggles that you may be experiencing. In this group, you can share your worries and frustrations and Katheleen will talk you through them and point you toward your Happily Ever After Divorce.

Here at ADLG, we’re not letting COVID-19 slow us down. Sign up for these virtual events to get the information and support you need without leaving home.

If you feel lost and confused in the fight for your children, this webinar is the tool you need.

Egg-splore Different Ways to Celebrate Easter Fun Holiday Activities the Whole Family Will Enjoy

Easter is approaching, and there are tons of activities you and your family can do to celebrate the holiday. These activities will let your children or grandchildren unlock their imaginations, all from the comfort of your own home.

KIWICO EGGSPERIMENTS Cost: $26.95 | KiwiCo.com

These experiments bundle creativity, science, and education in one fun, family- friendly package! Instead of having your kids decorate eggs with paint, you can use this kit to conduct scientific experiments. Your child will be able to color eggs and create crystalized shells by using chemistry, physics, and biology.

EGGED ON Cost: $24.50 | Amazon.com

You’ve heard of casino roulette, but have you heard of egg roulette? Well, now you have with Egged On, a Hasbro board game that will have you and your children laughing in no time. You first spin the wheel to see how many eggs you will crack over your head or someone else’s. Some of these eggs are filled with water, which are the eggs you don’t want. Try your luck with this fun-filled game.

EASTER COOKIE KIT Cost: $29.99 | ThePopcornFactory.com

Did somebody say cookies? Yes, we did! With this cookie kit, you and your kids will be creating edible bunnies, flowers, and eggs! The kit provides all the ingredients you need to bake delicious cookies, which is a perfect time to teach your child about the fundamentals of baking while having fun at the same time. This activity satisfies your creative needs and your cravings for a sweet treat. The traditional activities around Easter are fun, and now you have even more options to choose from — but these items will go fast so pick one up ASAP. These activities are enjoyable for the entire family, and you can create memories that will last a lifetime. Happy Easter!

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Hidden Vacation Getaway Gems in the US

Shh! This Is Our Little Secret …

BEST FOR QUIET PARADISE SEEKERS: SILVER FALLS STATE PARK, OR Travel Distance: 1.25 hours by car from Portland, OR Best Time to Visit: Summer Oregon is already known for its spectacular waterfalls, but if you want to find a quiet oasis of cascading waterfalls and lush scenery, look no further than Silver Falls State Park. Set off on a 9-mile hiking trail loop named Trail of Ten Falls to see all 10 waterfalls. If you choose to stay overnight, the campgrounds include a gorgeous forested setting with spacious sites, nice bathrooms, and options for tent or RV camping. These sites often require a little over an hour’s drive, but that’s why they are perfect for quiet and enjoyable vacations. Consider giving them a try!

Who says you need to travel abroad for a glamorous or exciting vacation? We have so many incredible spots within the U.S.! From coast to coast, here are three underrated domestic, family-friendly vacation spots you just might be missing out on.

BEST FOR FAMILIES: BROKEN BOW, OK Travel Distance: 3 hours by car from Dallas, TX, or Tulsa, OK Best Time to Visit: Late spring or fall Thanks to its location by Broken Bow Lake, you’ll be surrounded by forest and wildlife in almost any cabin or Airbnb you book in the area. The Wildlife Museum, BigFoot Speedway (a go-kart racing track), and Beaver’s Bend Mining Company (a kid-friendly geology center to learn about rocks, minerals, and the area’s mining history) are great attractions on top of the awesome hiking and lakeside outdoor activities available.

BEST FOR BEACH VACATIONERS: JEKYLL ISLAND, GA

Travel Distance: 1.5 hours by car from Savannah, GA, or 1.25 hours by car from Jacksonville, FL Best Time to Visit: Fall This island used to be a private escape for wealthy families in the 1880s — and it shows. It’s a unique vacation spot on the East Coast for anyone looking for serenity and adventure. With over 10 miles of white sand beaches, and much of it undeveloped, you’ll get a very natural, tranquil experience with excellent seafood and Southern- style dining options.

CONCIERGE PARTNER’S CORNER Reich Dental Center

What Our Clients Are Saying!

You chose divorce because it was the right thing for your health and the health of your family — but looking out for your well-being doesn’t stop there! Once you’ve looked after your mental health, you need to look after your physical health too, including your teeth.

“We went to Atlanta Divorce Law Group looking for a prenup. Had our initial consultation with Shawna — she was so helpful and answered all our questions! They took care of everything, and I had nothing to worry about ahead of my wedding — did it in less than 2 months!” –Nick and Caroline E. “Atlanta Divorce Law Group is a great firm to work with. You can really feel that they care about you and your family. Allen, Stephanie, and their team are all knowledgeable, professional, and compassionate. Very happy with my experience!” –Dave B.

That’s where Reich Dental Center comes in. They have

offices in both Smyrna and Roswell and the expertise to help you and your kids. Their team of experienced dentists offers children’s dentistry (from age 1 or the appearance of the first tooth), cleanings, exams, sealants, mouthguards, nightguards, and more. If you and your kids are dealing with stress, a nightguard might be just what you need to protect your teeth from grinding in your sleep. On top of those family dentistry offerings, Reich Dental Center can help you update your look with cosmetic dentistry. Keep them in mind if you want to top off your new haircut and gym membership with a bright new smile courtesy of whitening, dental bonding, porcelain crowns, or veneers.

To learn more about Reich Dental Center and the services they offer or to book an appointment, visit ReichDentalCenter.com.

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CYCLING IS THE PERFECT ACTIVITY FOR ALL AGES Just Like Riding a Bike

You likely learned how to ride a bike as a kid — according to a 2013 survey, about 94% of American adults did. Even if it has been a while since your last ride, most people agree you never forget how, and you don’t have to be in great shape to get started. Outside of walking, biking might be the most accessible exercise for all ages and ability levels. The beauty of biking is that it can be as relaxing or challenging as you want. The average kid learns to ride at around 5 years old, so the basics aren’t complicated. Biking helps young children get outside and gives them a taste of being a “big kid.” As a result, it’s excellent for their self-esteem as well as their fitness. Cycling is also perfect for adults who are new to exercise or need a low-impact activity. A short ride on a flat surface will get the heart rate up without feeling too strenuous, making it optimal for beginners. Older adults and people with knee

problems also use biking as an alternative to other forms of exercise because it’s easier on their joints.

Meanwhile, those looking for a challenge can easily find one. If you want a strenuous workout, it’s easy to ride farther, increase the resistance on your bike, or pick a steeper bike trail to explore. Biking is only a cakewalk if you choose to make it one. Since it’s perfect for all ages, cycling is the ideal outdoor activity to do with your family, allowing everyone to be involved in quality time together while promoting their health. To get started, make sure everyone has a bike they can use comfortably and a helmet that fits, plus understands bike safety. Once the basics are taken care of, you’re ready to hit the trails or explore the neighborhood. Even if you never learned how to ride, there’s no time like the present. You might feel a little silly at first, but the benefits of cycling will serve you — and your family — well for the rest of your life.

RELIGIOUS DIVORCE MADE SIMPLE We Can Help Your Friends and Family Easter is coming up on April 17, and like every holiday, it means different things for different people. Agnostic families celebrate with bunnies and eggs, while Christians go to church to commemorate the resurrection of Jesus. For Jewish families, Passover is the major spring holiday, not Easter.

WHAT IS A RELIGIOUS DIVORCE? A religious divorce is usually the only way for the couple to become “single” again in the eyes of their faith and gain the option to remarry. The process and rules vary from religion to religion. But one thing that’s consistent across most religions is that couples have to prove there was a “moral failure” (like bigamy, incest, desertion, abuse, imprisonment, or adultery) in their marriage to receive approval. This is very different from a civil divorce! The process of getting a religious divorce can be complicated and intimidating, especially for women. In Orthodox Judaism and Islam, for example, the religious divorce has to be initiated or consented to by the husband. This makes it very difficult for women in these marriages to start over without leaving the faith. HOW CAN WE HELP? Here at ADLG, we understand just how complex and difficult divorce can be for deeply religious people. We’ve worked with clients of all faiths, and although we can’t grant religious divorces, we can provide advice and insight on the role of mediation, arbitration, and litigation in a religious divorce. If you know someone who is religious and considering divorce, we have the expertise to help and provide an environment where they feel heard, safe, and accepted. Refer them to our firm today by sharing our website, AtlantaDivorceLawGroup.com, or phone number, 678-203-9893.

We keep track of these things here at ADLG because like holidays, divorces vary depending on a couple’s religion. Couples who practice Judaism, Buddhism, Catholicism, or Islam and had a faith-based wedding ceremony may need a religious divorce through their faith group in addition to a civil divorce.

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