Secrets to Stepparenting Success 3 Principles for Positive Relationships
Every stepparent should understand that remarriage can be as monumental an event for children as divorce. While some children quickly and naturally bond with their stepparents, many require time to get used to the change. Since every kid is different, there’s no surefire way to build a connection with stepchildren. But some general principles will increase your chances of success. Patience Don’t try to rush a relationship. Don’t ignore your stepchildren until they reach out, but do attempt to interact with them on their terms. Some kids automatically want to be your friend or spend time with you; others resist. Children process emotions at their own pace, so don’t take their behavior toward you personally. They can also incorrectly perceive questions as hostile, so avoid asking too many at once. Drop your expectations of what your relationship “should” be like and meet stepkids where they are. Authenticity Kids can tell when adults are being fake with them. Even if your intentions are noble, don’t try to be someone you’re not. Stepparents and stepchildren must genuinely get to know each other if they want to build a lasting relationship. Be kind to your stepkids in ways that are authentic to you, not what you think they want or expect. And
remember that whether or not you share an interest in their hobbies matters much less than how much you’re interested in them.
Respect Courtesy is a two-way street. It’s reasonable to expect your stepchildren to respect you, but they deserve the same in return. Give them privacy, adhere to their boundaries, and support their interests. Crucially, do not bad mouth your stepchildren’s other biological parent. Many children feel they are “betraying” their other parent by forming a relationship with their stepparent. If you demonstrate you won’t try interfering with the original child-parent bond, your stepchildren are more likely to come around and welcome you into their lives. Finally, remember that children cannot control their parents’ decision to remarry or combine households. It’s natural for them to have a lot of big feelings and even be somewhat afraid. A defensive, angry, or withdrawn stepchild does not make you a lousy stepparent. Leave the door open, and most children will eventually walk through it.
Have a Laugh!
Stuffed Pepper Soup
Inspired by TasteOfHome.com
Ingredients
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2 lbs ground beef
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2 tsp salt
6 cups water
2 tsp beef bouillon granules
1 28-oz can tomato sauce
1 tsp black pepper
1 28-oz can diced tomatoes, undrained
2 cups cooked long-grain rice Chopped fresh parsley (optional)
2 cups chopped green peppers 1/4 cup packed brown sugar
Directions
1. In a Dutch oven over medium heat, cook beef until no longer pink, breaking it into crumbles; drain. Add beef back to the pot and stir in all ingredients except the cooked rice. Bring to a boil. 2. Reduce heat. Simmer uncovered until peppers are tender, about 30 minutes. 3. Add cooked rice and simmer, uncovered, for about 10 minutes. If desired, sprinkle with chopped fresh parsley.
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