Mary Clare Southall October 29, 1953 - December 14, 2011
“She grasped the really important things in life seemingly without effort.” -Brian
Mary Clare Southall, age 58, of Pleasant View passed away on Wednesday, December 14, 2011 at her home. Memorial services will be conducted Monday, January 2nd, at 4 o'clock pm in the chapel of Austin & Bell Funeral Home in Pleasant View. Visitation will be from 3:00PM till the hour of service. Mary was born October 30, 1953 in Honolulu, Hawaii to the late Donald and Donna Southall. She grew up in Arlington, Virginia. She was a lifelong member of the Daughters of the American Revolution and most recently a member of the Springfield, TN chapter. She was also a passionate and extremely skilled quilter. She has made many friends in quilting circles throughout the country. She also enjoyed woodworking and designing and building furniture. Mary is survived by her devoted companion of 16 years, Brian Swift; sons, Andrew and Benjamin Clark; brothers, Dr. Kirby (Debi) Southall and Kit Southall; sister, Paulette Weiss; and grandchildren.
Thank you all for gathering here today. I wanted to share with you some of Mary's life since I met and came to love her. Our love, respect and friendship truly transcended our mere physical existence. When I first met Mary, in January 1996, she was broken in nearly all ways, financially being the most obvious. At first, I was simply compassionate, but not for long. Somehow she gave me insights into her ingenuity, intelligence and capacity to care and love. Her artistic side was matched by few, if any. She became my DaVinci and I her devoted patron. During the next few years, Mary followed me wherever my work took me. She simply quit her job and came to me. She even worked as my personal assistant on a New Jersey stint. The best time we had in these days were when we lived in “The Big Apple” in midtown Manhattan. She loved it! When I had a little time off, we walked everywhere. My next stint was in Milwaukee. Again, She quit her job to be with me. She loved the mid west people and went yard sailing and visited quilt shops to fill her time. As soon as she arrived, she did all necessary nesting to get us out of the hotel and into a small apartment. Near the end of this assignment, we were discussing finances when Mary stated, “Brian, you don't have to do this anymore!” I was 52, and as I ran the numbers (that is what mathematicians and engineers do), I discovered that I had become a money machine. So then we decided that we needed a place to retire. Mary did all the research and we selected the Nashville area. We moved into a hotel for ten months while our home was being built. Mary redrew the plans for the builder and he stopped using his own. We drove to the site on most days. One time, the builder invited us onto the deck. (The deck is where they layout the rooms below.) Mary stole the show as she proceeded to correct his interpretation from the architectural plans based upon hers. Do you see where I am going with this? Mary had taken complete charge while eliciting profound respect. The construction crew was snapping lines, obliterating others while scratching their heads. Later she repeated this leadership at their insistence. Meanwhile back at the hotel, we realized we had no significant furnishings. We went to all the places and we’re totally dismayed with the quality. Mary snapped, “Why don't we just make this stuff?” I said, “Where do we start?” Now I felt like the builder.
Brian's Tribute to Mary
As a side note, Mary had such a non-condescending demeanor that people sought her out to learn, including me. Mary compiled a list of tools, equipment, etc. Then she used a CAD system to design our first traunch of furniture. This furniture, including the pool table, now fills our home. Our entire shop, tools and wood pile were set up about a month later in August, 1999. The house furnishings were sparse. We used Walmart folding chairs to watch TV. Meanwhile, Mary established all the shrubbery and gardens. By mid-Fall we had become somewhat familiar and comfortable with basic woodworking and all of the tools. About 90% of this furniture may be found on our website (PoolTablePlans.com) along with complete descriptions and photos. These are sequenced in order of complexity. Mary always said, “Furniture building is just a three-dimensional quilt.” In 2001 we had completed the billiard room and began writing our first how-to book on how to really build a pool table. We also won first prize in a major architectural and design competition for “Best Home Billiard Room.” We launched our business that year near 911. Over the ensuing years, I watched Mary blossom from seeds I already knew were there. She just needed the space to soar. And oh how she flew! Her innate talents unfolded while mesmerizing me. Here was me with all of my education and training and so-called “success” only paled in Mary's presence. She grasped the really important things in During our precious time together, we lost both sets of our parents, made great friends and grew even closer. Mary became a near full-time master quilter and teacher. We also began to build period model ships that now adorn our home. People have asked us for years how we get along while being together every day, all day? Actually, this question never really occurred to us. A few weeks ago we all lost Mary suddenly and unexpectedly on December 14, 2011. All indications were that she passed instantly and painlessly. Please, let us all come together now to celebrate Mary's life as we grieve so deeply. You have lost a precious relative or friend. I have lost my leading lady. Mary, I will love and cherish you for all time. Your Love, Brian life seemingly without effort. We called one another “Babe.”
Memorial Life Celebration M ARY C LARE S OUTHALL Monday, January 2, 2012 4:00 o’clock
Austin & Bell Funeral Home Pleasant View, Tennessee 37146
Master Quilter
Pool Table Designer & Publisher
Graphic Designer
Furniture Designer & Builder
Daughter of the American Revolution
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