Attraction and Persuasion
THE UNFAIR DEAL CLOSER Seeing issues from another person’s perspective can help you sell in ways you’ve never imagined. Here’s a multimillion- dollar success habit that produces amazing results every time: If you’re having trouble figuring out what the other side wants, or having trouble “closing the deal,” use this tactic, which typical- ly silences the room and puts you in charge without playing the big-shot role. Here’s what I’ve done many times, and it always works: I politely interrupt everyone and ask the question I asked you in Chapter 1: “Hey guys, I just want to get clarity here. Let’s pretend it’s a year from now and we’re looking back. This deal went through and is going so well that we’re here celebrating our one-year anniversary. Could you guys tell me what that deal looks like? Can you describe the past year to me?” Then just stop talking and listen. People who were just pushing their own agendas or wanting to be heard or explaining why it should go their way literally be- come silent and thoughtful. They respond with uncomfortable silences, with “Damn good question,” and even with “I never looked at it that way.” And when I hear that last one, I’m like, “Then what the heck are we doing here!” This technique works in many situations. If your child is try- ing to decide where to go to college, say, “I want to understand what you want. So let’s imagine it’s a year from now. You’ve been off at college for a year and you just came home, and it’s been the best year of your life. What does that year look like? Describe it to me.” The answers you get will help your child make that difficult decision. This also works well when you’re arguing with your spouse. What if you say, “You know what? I don’t want to try and per- suade you to my point of view. Let’s imagine it’s a year from now, and we’ve just had the best year of our lives when it comes to our relationship. What does that past year look like? Describe it to me. What do our date nights look like? What have we done with our children? How much vacation time have we had? What house are we in? Describe it in detail.”
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