The Truest Form of Productivity and Why You Need to Master It
this, I’m too old. I’ll embarrass myself.” Or if you’re trying to decide about ending a toxic relationship, you worry that “It may be a bad relationship, but at least it’s a relationship—and who knows when I’ll ever find someone else.” Yes, those worries are oppressive in the moment, but you have to think beyond the common immediate fears and imag- ine if nothing changes and you have the same worries a year from now or five years from now. Nothing new has happened, you’ve refused to take any action, and you feel as stuck as you ever did. You’re still not making the money you’ve always dreamed of, you’re still 30 pounds overweight, and you’re still bored to tears by your job. If you’re honest with yourself, you know how this feels—it feels like crap. Let yourself experience it now, because that’s exactly how you’ll feel if you keep allowing worry to control your life. You’re worth more than your worry. I’m sure you don’t want to be enslaved by it, but that’s what’s happening. Perhaps this is because of some traumatic past experience that is affecting your behavior in the present. Whatever is causing you to get stuck in worry, it’s not worth it. A bigger, better version of yourself exists on the other side of that worry. There’s a great book by Ryan Holiday called The Obstacle Is the Way that addresses this issue. Its premise is that your par- adise, or what I refer to as your next level, is on the other side of your worry, but you can’t see it because you’re letting the worry get in the way. You may believe that you can find your way around your fear and anxiety, but you actually have to go straight through it. Byron Katie, who is tremendously insightful about relation- ships, has a terrific approach to managing worry. She maintains you need to subject that worry to the following four questions: 1. Is that worry true? Perhaps you respond yes, perhaps no. 2. Is that worry absolutely true? When you put that worry under the microscope of “absolutely,” you may find proof to the contrary.
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