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Compassion and Understanding
THANKS TO COVID-19
I’m Carmen Dellutri, your stereotypical guy and an attorney. Both guy and attorney tend to only look at the analytical, unemotional side of most things, no matter the situation. In comparison, women tend to be better communicators, better listeners, more compassionate and, let’s face it, just pay more attention to the little things going on around them. They process situations and emotions. I am usually lost in my own world of legal arguments and evidence, even with things as simple as grocery shopping. Going to the grocery store can be somewhat painful and frustrating for guys like me unless you can make a game of it. It shouldn’t surprise anyone to know that I can be a bit competitive, even if I’m only competing with myself. I still cannot understand why there are 400 different types of soap and why a list is not mandatory. When I go shopping, I usually play mind games and time myself. I have to organize my steps to get in and out as soon as possible. I don’t stop to read labels, touch the fruit, or have a conversation with the deli clerk (unless they are offering a free slice of prosciutto! Then I’m a talking machine). However, now it seems that others have become so quick to get in and get out. Everyone has their list, no one is
“While our processes are streamlined, we all seem to have the same unspoken agreement: I understand your fear.” stopping to make small talk, everyone knows exactly what they are there for. While it may seem as though everyone has suddenly lost their patience and are now shopping like me, I’m realizing nothing could be further from the truth. I even find myself shifting. In the past month and a half, I’ve found myself being more patient and respectful of others and their fears. I’m now willing to slow down and wait for other shoppers who don’t have my world record time in Publix. I’m paying more attention to the people around me and the fear in their face. I’m listening to the concern in their voices. It’s forcing me to be more compassionate and understanding. I’m even noticing others doing the same. While our processes are streamlined, we all seem to have the same unspoken agreement: I understand your fear. When I told my wife about my observations and eye-opening revelations, she smiled and said, “You’re exhausting. I’ve been
telling you to pay attention to the little things for 20 years.” And then she added, “I’m proud of you.” I’m still just a guy with an attorney mindset. But these days? I feel like I’ve finally graduated to being a human — all because of a stupid virus.
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