Ty Wilson Law - January 2020

... continued from Cover According to Wired magazine, “In a Pew Research Center study last year, 58% of U.S. parents said they sometimes or often look at their teenager’s messages, call logs, and websites they visit. In a separate study from 2016, 16% said they used location-sharing apps.”Wired also reported that Life360 had more than 19 million monthly active users in 2018. So, is this surveillance a good thing or a bad thing? Life360 touts the safety perks and conveniences of its service: It can alert parents if their kids are in a car crash, help them find each other if they’re separated, and make it easy to network about errands. (e.g. A parent alerted that their child is at the store can then ask them to pick up an item.) But, while Life360 and apps like it can give parents a sense of security, they also raise questions about privacy and can cause friction within families. In an article for The New York Times, psychologist Lisa Damour writes, “Location tracking can, without question, damage the

It might seem like parents are in a no-win situation, but the Center for Parenting Education points out a solution to the protection versus privacy problem: balance. The difficulty is knowing how to strike it. “Few things get a teenager riled up faster than the sense that they’re not being treated like a grown-up and not being given a say in things that affect them. Involving them in creating an action plan that clearly indicates the different levels of privacy you’re willing to give them is a way to show respect for them and to indicate your trust in them,” the Center advises. “Explain to your teen that greater privacy is something they’ll have to earn — and there are specific things they can do to move forward.” In the end, every teen is different, and no parenting strategy is perfect. But, if you’re considering tracking your teen, opening up a dialogue before you start monitoring is a good way to start.

connection between parent and teenager. Research shows that adolescents who believe their parents have invaded their privacy go on to have higher levels of conflict at home. And teenagers who resent being trailed digitally sometimes disable location features, take pains to ‘spoof’ their GPS, or leave their phones at friends’ houses to throw parents off their scent.” According to Wired, the video-sharing app TikTok has become a hub for teens to vent about Life360 and share strategies to outwit it — creating exactly the kind of dishonesty parents are trying to prevent.

With every new year comes an opportunity to reinvent ourselves or start down a new path toward self-improvement. Making resolutions is a big part of many families’NewYear’s traditions, and parents often have a desire for their kids to take part in that tradition when they’re old enough. Following through on resolutions is tough, especially for young children, but with your help, they can achieve their goals. Practice what you preach. You are your children’s role model for almost everything, including following through on NewYear’s resolutions. So, ask yourself if you follow through on your own resolutions. When you proclaim that you will readmore books or finally get a gymmembership, do you actually try to do it? Your kids will assign as much importance to NewYear’s resolutions as you do, so by sticking to your own commitments, you can help them stay on track too. Keep things simple and achievable. When your kids are forming their resolutions, their first attempts will probably be very broad. Statements like“I want to be more kind”or“I will HELP YOUR KIDS ACHIEVE MORE THIS YEAR With Simple and Actionable Goals

try to helpmore around the house”incorporate good values but don’t include any actionable steps. Help your kids think of tangible ways to act on those goals. For example, if they want to be tidier, a good resolutionmight be for them to clean their roomonce a week or take responsibility for one household chore every day. Don’t do all the work for them. While it’s important for you to help your kids formulate their goals, be sure that you aren’t taking over. If they’re ultimately responsible for their resolutions, they’ll feel more compelled to keep them. Instead, suggest different goal areas they could improve, such as home, school, or sports, and let them elaborate. When it comes to creating habits, nobody is perfect, so even if your kids falter on their goals in the middle of February, don’t worry. The important thing is that you continue to encourage them every step of the way.

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