NOTES with Jay Conner Success
What’s the No. 1 reason people don’t take action? I encourage you to ask this question today, especially if you haven't raised any private money yet. If you’re honest with yourself, I bet the answer will always be that fear has entered the equation. Fear is the biggest roadblock most people have to overcome. We’re afraid of failure, or we’re afraid of rejection, or we might even be afraid of the unknown. I know I was nervous the first time I approached a potential lender. My first potential private lender was in my warm market, someone I knew from church. I didn’t even have my 16-minute CD recording to hand out yet. I didn’t know exactly what I was going to say or what the outcome would be, but I chose to act in spite of my fear. When you recognize fear is the reason you’re not taking action, the next thing you should do is ask, “What’s the worst that could happen?” In the case of raising private money, the worst thing that can happen when you approach a potential lender is that you don’t get any money. I often remind people, you can’t lose what you don’t have. After I approached my first potential lender in church, I ended up getting $250,000. What would have happened if I had let fear keep me from acting? I would have got nothing. I usually teach people how to raise and attract private money. Today, I want to teach you how to overcome any fear that may be holding you back. There are four quotes that illustrate exactly what you need to achieve to overcome fear: “The most successful people learn to become comfortable with being uncomfortable.” This quote, spoken by Rick Harrison from the show “Pawn Stars” at a convention I attended some time ago, really resonated with me. When I spoke to my first private lender, I was nervous. When I gave my first presentation to real estate investors, I could barely sleep the Fear of Failure and Rejection How to Overcome the
night before. I was about to step out of my comfort zone, and that’s a scary thing. But in order to achieve the results I wanted, I needed to train myself to become a different person who felt comfortable doing these things. The idea of a comfort zone comes from what’s called a homeostatic impulse. This is what keeps our bodies at a consistent 98.6 degrees and what encourages us to follow what’s normal and familiar. But successful people aren’t normal! They regularly go out and do new things they aren’t comfortable with and start to look forward to getting out of their comfort zone. Allow yourself to do things that might make you feel uneasy. The opposite of fear is love. Your fear — your struggle — cannot exist when you feel love, particularly self-love and gratitude. When I speak on stage, I begin with affirmations. “I believe in myself. I believe in others. Others believe in me. I trust myself. I trust others. Others trust me. I attract millions in private money, and I have a millionaire mind.” I don’t just say these things. I believe them every day. You rise above the fear when you believe in yourself. “The struggle ends when the gratitude begins.”
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