Florida Women's Law Group - February 2020

DON’T FEAR ONLINE DATING.

Online dating is a great way to meet people outside of your social circle, and there are many dating sites and apps specifically for singles over 50 who are ready to mingle. Julie Spira, a relationship expert with senior dating app OurTime, says that “Authentic dating profiles get the best results.” Basically, don’t lie on your profile. Use a picture of you from this year and be proud of your age. That’s the best way to find people who will love the real you. GO TO 26 DIFFERENT PLACES. Prefer to meet people in person? Lisa Copeland, a dating coach who works exclusively with women over 50, recommends creating a list of 26 different places in your area, one for each letter of the alphabet, then going to those places. While you’re out, Copeland says, “You want to smile. Make eye contact. Ask a question. Give a compliment and put a question behind it.” BE PRESENT WHEN MEETING NEW PEOPLE. Dating as a senior means coming to the table with a lot of baggage. Dating is when people get acquainted, so be careful about sharing that baggage right out of the gate. This doesn’t mean you should never talk about heavy topics, but remember this advice from the popular dating site, eHarmony: “Early on, focus on enjoying each other’s company here and now.” It doesn’t matter if you’re 26 or 62, dating is always hard. You have to step outside your comfort zone and trudge through a series of terrible first dates. But in the end, it’s all worth it when you find that special someone with whom you can spend your golden years. Just remember, you’ll never meet that person if you don’t make the leap.

Time to Get Back Out There!

Expert Advice to Beat the Stigma of Senior Dating

Getting back into dating can be hard when you’ve been out of the game for a few decades. In fact, some would-be romantics are so self-conscious about their age that they never even try! In honor of Valentine’s Day, we’ve rounded up some expert advice on dating at any age.

THINKING OF GETTING BACK TOGETHER? Consider These Things First

It can happen even after the messiest divorces — despite everything that led to your separation, you’re thinking about reconciliation. These thoughts can crop up during the divorce proceedings or even years down the line, and they’re completely natural to have. As family law professionals, we of course understand any decision you want to make regarding your past marriage, but we also want to lay out a few things that should be seriously considered before moving toward reconciling with your former partner. BEWARE OF ROSE-TINTED GLASSES. Most marriages have bright moments that can make you nostalgic. It’s human nature to remember the good times and forget the frustrations of the past, which can make divorce even harder than it already is. But if you find yourself pining for these moments, it’s helpful to take a step back and revisit the reasons your divorce happened in the first place. ASK WHAT YOU’RE WILLING TO FORGIVE. Chances are that your divorce didn’t happen on a whim. At some point, it was clear the relationship was untenable and reconciliation may not fix the issues that led you there. What are the odds that your former partner changes for the better this time? What issues would you have to face all over again? What would you have to compromise on? These can be complex questions to unpack on your own. Often, seeking out a relationship counselor when considering a reconciliation can help untangle your thoughts on the situation. 2 Florida Women’s Law Group | 904-549-6553

KNOW THE LEGAL RAMIFICATIONS. Getting back together during or after your divorce can end up costing you time and money should things not work out between you. Whether you filed a motion to voluntarily dismiss the dissolution proceedings during your divorce or you get remarried after you are both declared legally single, getting a second divorce will mean starting the whole process over from the beginning. This includes paying the filing fee and rehashing the same emotional arguments that went into your first divorce proceedings. It’s always advisable to talk to your lawyer before seeking reconciliation. We can also point you toward resources, such as marriage counselors, to help you find the path that is best for you.

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