Douglass & Runger - MAY 2021

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MAY 2021

The Little Boy Who Stared Back at Me WHY I BELIEVE IN GHOSTS

As an attorney, I have to approach my work analytically. I have to comb relentlessly through the facts, ignoring emotions sometimes, to help my clients make the best decisions for their cases and lives. That’s why it may shock some of my readers to discover that I actually believe in the ghosts and the paranormal — something some may consider more opinion than fact. As we approach National Paranormal Day on May 3, I want to share my personal ghost story with you all. Maybe it will convince some of you to accept that we don’t fully know or understand everything around us, but if anything, it's too great of a story not to share! The year was 2005, and I was just out of law school and renting a two-bedroom apartment at the Kirby Station apartment complex in east Memphis. The apartments were a little older, but there was nothing about the complex that would sound any paranormal alarm bells — until one random weeknight. The layout of my apartment is kind of important for this story. My bedroom was at the back of the apartment facing a hallway, which led out to the kitchen and living room area. To the right of my bedroom, right outside my bedroom door, was the bathroom, and to the left of my bedroom, right outside my bedroom door, was a spare bedroom. I don’t sleep with my door closed, and for whatever reason, I woke up around 2 a.m. this particular night and sat up in my bed and looked directly out my bedroom door into the hallway. “AT THAT MOMENT, I FELT COMPLETELY CALM. I WASN’T SCARED OR NERVOUS — JUST AWARE.”

the topic of ghosts came up, and I told Jodi about my experience. She thought it was weird, but I told her I knew what I saw and it was totally real. Several months later, Jodi returned home from a hairdresser appointment with some corroboration for my experience. When she was getting her hair cut, she happened to mention my ghost story to her stylist. When she said I was living at Kirby Station apartment complex at the time, the stylist paused. “Oh my god,” the stylist said, “there’s ghosts all over there. I saw several ghosts there years ago.” Turns out, her hairdresser had been a resident at Kirby Station like me, and similarly, she had experienced late-night run-ins with ghosts and unexplained paranormal activities. That was all the proof I needed; I had actually seen a ghost. It may sound crazy to some people, but I know what I experienced. Until that moment, I hadn’t really given much thought to ghosts. I enjoyed the stories, and like any Memphis resident, I was intrigued by the tales of its strange, potentially haunted past. But that night made me a firm believer in ghosts, and I’ve had an open mind about the afterlife ever since. I try to believe people when they have experiences, and I support finding connections in the weird things that happen every day, like floating orbs or messages from beyond. After all, sometimes the impossible is actually very possible. There is no other way to explain how, when I was of sound mind and body, a little apparition of a boy looked me in the eyes.

As clear as day, I can remember seeing a little boy, who was probably 8 or 9 years old and dressed in antiquated attire, exit my bathroom and walk out into the hallway right outside my bedroom door. The boy stopped, turned his head, and stared right at me for about 10 seconds. At that moment, I felt completely calm. I wasn’t scared or nervous — just aware. I looked right back at him. The boy then looked away and continued walking into the guest bedroom room next to mine. At this moment, I should have freaked out; I was the kind of person who would freak out! This wasn’t a normal occurrence, and I was stone-cold sober in the middle of the night! There was no logical explanation for what was happening — other than a little ghost boy had just walked past me into the bedroom next to mine. I hopped out of bed and walked to the guest bedroom following him. I didn’t think much about what I was doing, but I scanned the room and the closet looking for the boy. When he was nowhere to be found, I laid back down in bed and fell asleep. I don’t know why I was so calm, but I didn’t feel threatened or the overwhelming need to call my friends or Jodi, who was only my girlfriend at the time. In fact, I kind of forgot about the experience for a while until one day,

So, do you believe?

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THE LEGACY OF DALE EARNHARDT

CONTINUES WITH SAFETY IMPROVEMENTS IN RACING

Known as “The Intimidator” to sportswriters who loved his rowdy personality and “Ironhead” to opponents who loathed racing against him, Dale Earnhardt Sr. forever changed racing in both his life and tragic death on Feb. 18, 2001, during the final lap of the Daytona 500. Today, Earnhardt’s legacy lives on through the racing triumphs of his descendants, like Dale Earnhardt Jr., and the safety protocols his death inspired. Earnhardt was born into a racing family in 1951 and made his NASCAR debut in 1975. He went on to win 34 races at the sport’s most popular track in Daytona, Florida, and record 76 career wins. Earnhardt’s style of racing was unparalleled, and most fans will never forget the 2000 race at Talladega Superspeedway where he barreled from 18th into first place over the final six laps.

On that fateful day in 2001, Earnhardt was racing toward the finish line on the final lap — a first-place finish in his sights — when he collided with three other vehicles, rammed into the concrete barrier, and slid to a stop in the infield. Earnhardt was pronounced dead at the hospital that evening, the result of a skull fracture that happened within 80 milliseconds of the initial impact. Almost immediately, NASCAR made sweeping changes to the sport, including requiring drivers to wear a head and neck support (HANS) device along with their helmet to stabilize the body in an accident. It was a device that Earnhardt refused to wear due to its restraint and one that potentially could have saved his life had he been wearing it.

that a seat belt malfunction led to Earnhardt’s death.) Along with those improvements, NASCAR continues to update its safety measures. According to ESPN, the sport has also required drivers to wear full-face helmets, and vehicles are now outfitted with shock- absorbing foam to protect drivers’ bodies from the energy produced in an accident. The work NASCAR did to improve driver safety was on full display at the 2020 Daytona 500, when racer Ryan Newman’s vehicle hit the wall, flipped upside down, and was then propelled into the air before landing in the infield. The accident was horrific, and Newman had to seek treatment at a nearby hospital — but he lived. “Those people,” Newman said to ESPN about those who made safety regulations a standard in the sport, “collectively saved my life.”

The organization also instituted improved outer barriers and seat belts. (It was previously believed

Age Is Just a Number

WHY ESTATE PLANNING IS NECESSARY FOR EVERYONE

This season, millions of high school and young college graduates will earn their diplomas. Their graduations mark the beginning of a new phase, one that’s bound to feel exciting, if not overwhelming. Time is on a young graduate’s side, but that’s a dangerous mindset to fall into. “I’ve got time” is often a mantra we say to fool ourselves into thinking procrastination is a more viable option than completing the task on our to-do list. The truth is that we should complete necessary responsibilities even at a young age.

your immediate family, like a parent, with whom you are not close. If you were to die without a will or become incapacitated, would you want them to inherit your hard-earned money or assume control of your finances if you did not have a great relationship with them? Lastly, let’s say you’re in a long-term relationship but aren’t married. You love this person and you

Estate planning is a big one.

Young adults between the ages of 18–35 often aren’t thinking about death or becoming incapacitated. They can still fearlessly do things like sleep on futons or scarf down fast food. But no one knows what tomorrow will bring or what obstacles we will face just one year from now. (The pandemic is a great example of this.) If you are 21 or older, are single, don’t have children, and were to fall into a coma tomorrow, who would make medical and financial decisions for you? You might assume your parents can, but unless you have specifically designated them as your agents under medical and financial powers of attorney, they can’t. You’re no longer a minor, so your parents are not considered your guardians. Hospital staff may have to decide or the courts may ultimately designate someone for you. If you have a preference, they may not know that.

want to provide for them financially should anything happen to you. They may also be the person you trust most to make medical and financial decisions on your behalf. Unfortunately, if you don’t make that designation legal — by naming them as a beneficiary in your will or designating them as your agent under a power of attorney — then your significant other could miss out on financial support after your untimely death or could be powerless in a medical emergency. It’s never too early to begin planning for the future. Graduates and their families would be wise to contact our team today to protect themselves and their futures. Learn more about this and our other legal options online at DouglassRunger.com.

Furthermore, if you’re an independent young adult who is building a small nest egg for yourself, you want to protect those assets — especially if there are members of

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I’ve Been Named an Executor in a Loved One’s Will. Now What?

Shaved Asparagus Salad

Naming an executor for your estate in your Last Will and Testament is an important decision. You must choose someone who is responsible, understands your wishes, and is patient enough to carefully move through the probate process. (Also, if you don’t choose, the court may ultimately choose for you after your death.)

Inspired by ACoupleCooks.com

Tangy citrus and salty Parmesan cheese complement earthy, fresh asparagus, a favorite spring vegetable with a short growing season.

When the roles are reversed and you’ve been named in a loved one’s will as the executor of their estate, it’s important that you understand just how significant your job is.

INGREDIENTS • 1 lb asparagus spears • 1 tbsp lemon juice • 1 tsp Dijon mustard • 3 tbsp extra-virgin olive oil • 3/4 cup Parmesan cheese, grated

As the executor of an estate, you ensure that the steps and wishes outlined by the decedent in their Last Will and Testament are met, but you must understand that you are not legally allowed to carry out any of the wishes set forth in a will until an estate has been opened and you have been formally appointed the executor by a probate court judge after the decedent’s passing. Taking any action without court approval — including tasks like giving heirs their inheritance and paying taxes or other bills — could land you in serious legal trouble and further stall probate. You may think you’re doing the right thing by following the decedent’s will without opening up an estate in probate court, but you are not. You’re actually setting yourself up for unnecessary scrutiny by both the courts and beneficiaries of the will and are potentially subjecting yourself to individual liability for taking action without proper legal authority. The probate process typically takes anywhere from 9–15 months, so you may serve in this role for a while. That being said, there are two steps you can take prior to and during probate that can both simplify and expedite the process. Step 1: Gather important documents and information. Part of your job as an executor involves locating and collecting sums of money in the decedent’s bank accounts. This endeavor will require gathering personal and financial information, including logins, account numbers, bank statements, and other details. As the executor, you will likely have access to the decedent’s personal and financial information, so gather what you can as soon as you can and stay organized. Routinely check the decedent’s mail to obtain bank statements, bills, or other important documents. Create a list of all known estate assets (including houses and bank accounts) and debts (any unpaid bills the decedent owed at the time of his or her death, including mortgages on a home). If possible, try to locate tax returns the decedent filed for the last couple years of their life. You may need this information moving forward. Step 2: Seek legal guidance. Whether you rely on the attorney who prepared the decedent’s will or you work with your own legal counsel, seeking legal counsel is one of the best choices you can make, and you should do so as soon as possible. A probate attorney will have the knowledge and experience to guide you through this often complicated and ever-changing process. They can help you avoid legal and personal trouble all while ensuring your loved one’s wishes are properly carried out. Our probate and estate planning team at Douglass & Runger are happy to help anyone seeking advice on choosing or acting as an executor. Contact us today and learn more about our other legal services by visiting DouglassRunger.com.

• 1/2 tsp kosher salt • 1/8 tsp red pepper flakes • Freshly ground black pepper, to taste

DIRECTIONS

1. With a vegetable peeler, shave each asparagus spear from tip to base. This is easiest to do if the asparagus is on a flat surface. 2. Place shaved asparagus in a bowl and blot off excess moisture with a paper towel. 3. In a separate bowl, make a vinaigrette by whisking together lemon juice, Dijon mustard, and olive oil. 4. Pour vinaigrette over shaved asparagus and add Parmesan cheese, salt, red pepper flakes, and black pepper. Toss to combine. Taste and adjust seasonings. INSPIRATION “I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.”―

–Diane Ackerman

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1 The Little Boy Who Made Me a Believer in Ghosts 2 The Man Who Changed Racing Forever Yes, Young People Need Estate Planning! 3 What All Estate Executors Need to Know! Shaved Asparagus Salad 4 5 Ways to Increase Your Family’s Fitness Inside This Issue

Get Fit With Your Family 5 Easy Ways to Get Everyone Moving

May is National Physical Fitness and Sports Month. As a parent, you probably know exercise is important for your children’s physical development. It helps build healthy bones, muscles, and joints and reduces the risk of developing diabetes and other diseases later in life. But did you know that physical activity also has many mental and behavioral health benefits? It’s been shown to improve children’s cognitive skills and concentration, boost their self-esteem, and reduce symptoms of stress, anxiety, and depression. One of the best ways to encourage healthy behaviors in your children is by modeling them yourself. Studies have found that more than 80% of adolescents and adults are not getting enough aerobic activity, showing that children often follow in their parents’ footsteps and that exercising together can benefit everyone.

You may be thinking it’s hard enough just to get yourself to the gym, but Stephen Virgilio, author of “Active Start for Healthy Kids,” encourages parents not to limit themselves to traditional forms of exercise. Instead, think of exercise more broadly as “leading an active lifestyle.” And remember that exercise can be fun and a great way to get in more family time.

3. Turn chores into games. Dirt has invaded from outer space and must be eliminated. Set the scene with your kids, grab your tools, and get to work removing the enemy while having fun. 4. Incorporate simple exercises into screen time. Start by making up fun names for exercises like situps or jumping jacks. Then, challenge each other to see who can do the most during your favorite show’s commercial breaks. 5. Get fit in the great outdoors. Cleaning up the yard, planting and maintaining a garden, or just running around outside are all great ways to get in more movement.

Here are five easy ways to incorporate more movement into your family’s day.

1. Create a walking ritual. Start walking around the neighborhood before or after dinner each night. Aim for a 20-minute stroll. 2. Have a dance party. Clear some space in the living room, make a playlist with everyone’s favorite tunes, and boogie down for as long as you have the energy.

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