And that playlist included the words of Gabor Maté: “Addictions are not mysterious ailments, not willfully self-inflicted maladies, not ‘primary brain disorders,’ not diseases: they are coping mechanisms.” I knew my drinking was a coping mechanism. First, I had to unpack this truth— my truth. Next, I had to reshape a life from which I needed no escape. Writing my own recovery script has meant going back to school at 65 to become a psychotherapist. It has meant launching my own memoir- writing classes, called Writing Your Recovery, helping other women find their voices. And it has meant meeting Susan Christina Creamer and a new tribe of sober sisters. It has meant hosting on a regular basis, using my voice to shape a new narrative. It has meant wrapping both my hands around the things I love, and making them a priority. It has meant ditching a script I had memorized, and coming up with a new one. Last summer, that meant wrapping my arms around a woman for the first time. That season had its own soundtrack too: a private playlist she made for me, with Adele’s Make You Feel My Love, a good dose of Stevie Wonder and three different versions of Dancing in the Moonlight. And yes, we were dancing in the moonlight. It was love at first sight. All things are possible when we give up alcohol. And yes, the universe has a wilder imagination than I do. As Mary Oliver once wrote, “the world had forgotten its brokenness.” Every season has its soundtrack. It’s almost the summer of 2022. Choose your playlist wisely. And remember: the one voice you’ll listen to most in life is your own between your ears. Pay attention. Take a moment to ask yourself: what thoughts am I humming in my head? Ask, as a wise friend counsels: Do they serve me? Only you can curate your own mind. Only you have your hand on the volume control. May your world—and mine--forget its brokenness. And this summer, may we all take a little time to go dancing in the moonlight. Or at the very least, hum along.
To learn more about Writing Workshops with Ann Dowsett Johnston please click on her workshop information HERE
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