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THE HOLIDAYS LOOK DIFFERENT NOW, AND THAT’S OKAY YOUR CO-PARENTING SEASONAL SURVIVAL GUIDE
Holidays are often special, meaningful times when everyone has unique traditions and ideas about celebrating. But when you are entering your first year of co-parenting, or even your fifth, figuring out how to share that time with your children can feel overwhelming. You’re not just trying to be fair to both parents. You’re trying to make it a smooth, happy time for your kids, all while balancing expectations from extended family, your own emotional needs, and court- ordered time-sharing schedules. It’s a lot at once during a hectic season. As you navigate all these pressures, one of the best things you can do to ensure your holiday plan honors everyone’s traditions is to start thinking about it early on. Get ahead of the busy months of gatherings and parties so you aren’t scrambling at the last minute. The earlier you and your ex have a plan ready for what time sharing will look like, the easier it will be to balance all the various expectations. Use clear, direct language in your plan, documenting your conversations together. Show your co-parent you’re flexible and willing to make adjustments. Spend time thinking about your favorite holiday traditions. What things have you always done every Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Hanukkah that you want to incorporate into your co-parenting calendar? There are likely activities on both sides you’ll want your children to experience. It doesn’t have to be all about opening presents Christmas morning or who gets to host Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe you want to do an outing with your kids during the fall or winter,
like going to the pumpkin patch or taking an autumn stroll to see the leaves change. You can build these into your seasonal schedule if you plan and communicate well. Take a minute to realize your co-parent may feel the same pressures, challenges, and desires around the holidays. Try to think about it from their point of view, keeping a fair balance of their values and yours. These conversations can be emotional, so be ready for give-and-take and empathize with their perspective. Getting input from your children on what they want to do is ideal, but only if it’s age and maturity appropriate and realistic. Kids should feel they have a voice and can openly share their desires, but you have to be cautious. You don’t want to overpromise or set it up for expectations you can’t meet. As the adults, you must keep any legal or external restrictions in mind, like court-ordered schedules. You can validate and reinforce their feelings, including their preferences, so no one feels ignored or misled. Your children need to know the holidays will look different. Things will change. Try to emphasize the positives, whether it’s the joy of two Christmases or getting a longer holiday season with two households’ worth of celebrations. A visual aid, like a shared calendar, can help your children grasp the new arrangements.
co-parent has ever spent a holiday without the kids. Try to make room for your ex’s feelings, to the extent you can, and prioritize self-care for yourself. Have ideas to deal with your own disappointment or sadness that might arise, like new traditions for yourself or time with friends. Remember, holiday traditions aren’t about a specific day of the week. You can create these magical holiday memories any day. Though this holiday season may be different and new for your family, you can find a path forward as long as you have two people willing to prioritize the kids.
–Kathleen McClellan
It’s not just your little ones who will feel the change. This may be the first time you or your
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SMOG, SOOT, AND STUBBLE
HOW BOUNTIFUL BEARDS BECAME VICTORIAN AIR PURIFIERS
BREAKING FREE SAFELY The end of a relationship can be an emotional and even volatile time, especially if your soon-to-be-ex is aggressive, abusive, or has a history of violence. If you are preparing to divorce a partner who makes you feel unsafe, take that fear seriously. Your children’s safety and well-being are the most important things, and you can take steps to protect yourself legally, emotionally, and physically. PHYSICALLY SEPARATE. One of the most effective ways to protect yourself if you feel in danger around your partner is to remove yourself from the situation physically. Putting distance between you and them will minimize the opportunities that person has to harm you. Unless you have children together under the age of 18, usually your husband doesn’t need to know where you are. You can be in a different location as the divorce proceeds. In Florida, when minors are involved, you will need to get the written consent of the other parent or a court order to move 50 or more miles away. It’s essential to document any abusive behavior by contacting the police so you have a record of it. You should work with an attorney who can help you navigate relocation rules. Courts will make decisions based on what’s best for the child and will likely grant a relocation in abusive situations. CREATE A SAFETY PLAN. You can work with an attorney or domestic violence advocate to create a safety plan if you feel unsafe with your partner. This personalized guide helps keep you safe during and after a divorce. It should include safe places you can go, like a friend’s house, and a phrase you can tell a trusted person if you are in danger. Include any necessary documents, resources for support, and instructions on how you will keep your children safe if you are a parent. Along with a plan, store money somewhere only you can access and have an emergency bag packed with essentials in case you need to leave quickly. You don’t have to go through this alone; people in your life and professionals will support you. We’re here to help you move forward safely. Contact us today to schedule a consultation. How to Protect Yourself During a Dangerous Divorce
Step aside, antibiotics! In the smog-choked streets of 1850s London, where chimney smoke clung to every surface and a “fog” could linger for months, doctors championed a fuzzy solution. The prescription? Grow a beard. Not just any beard, but big, bushy, chest- brushing beards that could rival a lion’s mane. Their advice made it seem like thick, woolly beards were a frontline defense against disease. As London’s population surged past the one million mark in the mid-1800s, so did its coal consumption. Residents warmed their homes and powered the city with coal, releasing dense plumes of smoke that clung to the damp air. These weren’t your average winter mists. In 1873, one thick smog event blanketed the city, contributing to hundreds of bronchitis-related deaths. Another hung around for four months in 1879, plunging London into darkness. Victorian physicians, caught between outdated theories and the dawn of germ science, believed thick beards could filter the noxious air swirling through the city. With coal smoke saturating the sky and mysterious illnesses lurking in every cough, they saw the beard as a barrier and a natural air purifier, trapping invisible enemies before they reached the throat or lungs. Public speakers were even told their beards would soothe strained vocal cords! Men were reassured that their whiskers could keep sore throats at bay. But here’s the ironic twist in this follicular fairy tale. Modern research paints a less noble picture of the beard. According to dermatologists and ecologists, those bodacious beards trap bacteria, food particles, and even play host to tiny squatters (aka ectoparasites). What the Victorians hailed as a filter functioned more like a germ motel!
So, while the beard boom of the 1800s was well-intentioned, it might be best remembered as a moment when style, “ science ,” and smog collided and the beard won (if only temporarily).
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JOIN THE GROUP WHERE WOMEN SUPPORT WOMEN FEELING ALONE IN YOUR DIVORCE?
If you’re a woman in the thick of a divorce, especially one that feels emotionally draining, isolating, or confusing, you may find yourself wondering, “Where did everyone go?” Divorce can shake the foundation of your relationships, making you feel like no one understands or that your support systems have disappeared. As you untangle yourself from a narcissistic or controlling partner, you’re also rebuilding your identity, future, and peace of mind. And, you probably have many questions.
lawyers have helped countless women break free of unhappy relationships, reclaim their voices, and build brighter futures. We want the same for you. You deserve clarity, confidence, and community as you move through this season of your life.
If you’re ready to get your questions answered and join our private, respectful community, visit Facebook.com/brucelawfirmpa/groups .
You don’t have to do this alone; connection, support, and real answers are closer than you think.
You’re not alone, and we can’t wait to see you in our next discussion.
Divorce Answers for Women is a private, women-only Facebook group we created to support you through one of life’s most challenging transitions. This is a safe space where women like you can ask all their biggest divorce questions, bond with others on the same journey, and learn about resources available to you as you embark on this new chapter of your life. When you join this free group, you not only gain a support system of women who understand what you’re going through, but you’ll also get insight from the seasoned divorce lawyers in our firm. Whether contemplating a separation, going through the process, or recovering after a divorce, we’re here to offer advice, guidance, and friendship. During a divorce, a support network can make all the difference as you navigate the challenges, rediscover yourself, and move forward. Our Facebook group is where you can be honest, vulnerable, and truly cared about. Our empathetic and skilled
Inspired by TheViewFromGreatIsland.com
ALMOND BUTTER SKILLET BLONDIES
This dessert is quick and indulgent — perfect for sharing or savoring solo right out of the pan!
Ingredients •
6 tbsp unsalted butter, melted 3/4 cup packed brown sugar 1/4 cup granulated sugar 2/3 cup almond butter
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2 tsp vanilla extract 1 cup all-purpose flour
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1/4 tsp salt
1 1/2 cups dark chocolate chips
2 large eggs
Directions 1.
Set oven to 350 F. Butter a 10-inch cast iron skillet.
2. In a large bowl, whisk together the melted butter, sugars, and almond butter until smooth and creamy. Whisk in eggs and vanilla. 3. Stir in flour and salt, and then fold in the chocolate chips. 4. Spread the batter evenly into the skillet, and bake for about 25–28 minutes, until the edges begin to set and turn golden brown. 5. Allow to cool, slice, and enjoy!
Team members attended a family law trial advocacy program in Tampa.
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Navigating the Holidays After Separation page 1
Beards Were a Victorian Health Hack
What to Know When Violence Is a Factor page 2
We’re Here for You
Almond Butter Skillet Blondies page 3
Why Teen Financial Skills Matter Now More Than Ever page 4
SAVING IN A SWIPE SOCIETY RAISING MONEY-SAVVY TEENS IN THE DIGITAL AGE
In today’s tap-to-pay world, the days of piggy banks and cash allowances for chores are gone. Teens are growing up with financial apps, Venmo, debit cards, and virtual transfers they can’t physically see. In this cashless culture, parents have to rethink how they teach young adults basic financial literacy. Empowering your children to budget wisely is all about helping them understand the value behind a swipe, tap, or click. TEEN SPENDING Today’s teens spend more money online, frequenting food delivery apps and websites like Amazon or Sephora. Though their digital shopping habits have increased, fewer young people seek part-time or summer jobs. Studies have found that teens who
work to earn a paycheck are more likely to budget, save, and think before purchasing. With less hands- on experience with money management and the convenience of buying items with the simple click of a button, it’s become easier than ever to spend money impulsively and recklessly. TEACHING TIPS In a sea of apps and short-form videos, parents can be a trusted source of information about financial literacy; it just takes creativity to make the lessons stick. Start by having regular discussions about finances as a family. Real-life examples can help them practice saving and budgeting, like plotting out the expenses for school supplies or identifying big purchases they want to make, like a car.
Encourage teens in a fun way, like doing a savings challenge where they have to put away $1 every week. This can help them get into the habit of saving and waiting to buy the things they want until they have the budget to support it. Gamify money management lessons as much as you can to keep them engaged. You can even find apps that help young people budget and learn important financial concepts. One app called BusyKid helps them manage their allowance and introduces them to safe investment opportunities. In a world where money moves with a tap, it’s more important than ever for teens to focus on financial literacy. With the right tools and conversations, you can help them set up smart money habits that last a lifetime.
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