MetroFamily Magazine November 2020

FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS

Bullying Is my child a victim or instigator? BY DR. ERICA FAULCONER

Bullying is an all too common issue among school-aged children. We, as parents, are often ill prepared to recognize and intervene when faced with bullying in our own children, whether they are being bullied or the one doing the bullying. Bullying can have many different facets. It can be physical with hitting, kicking, pinching or spitting. It can be verbal with teasing, taunting or threats. It can also be social with spreading rumors, leaving someone out on purpose or embarrassing someone in public. With social media, social bullying is much more prevalent and easy to accomplish. According to stopbullying.gov, 20 percent of school-aged children report being bullied. Unfortunately there are likely many more kids who may not report bullying out of fear or simply because they view bullying as a “normal” part of their lives at school.

Is my child a bully? The other side of this equation is being able to recognize when your child is the bully. We often don’t want to see this in our children and may refuse to accept it. If you see that your child constantly needs to be in charge or dominate their peers, this can be a warning sign. Also look for children who are aggressive, easily frustrated or talk negatively about others. Look for these warnings signs that your child is a bully: • Frequently getting into fights at school and/or home • Getting sent to the principal’s office often • Blaming others for their problems • Aggressive behavior • Lying

Is my chilD bEing bulliED? Victims of bullying often are viewed as different among their peers. Bullies tend to find kids they perceive as weak or with low self-esteem. But kids don’t have to fall into these typical categories to be bullied. Sometimes the bully views the victim as a threat and thus wants to be in control. Look for these warning signs that your child is being bullied: • Physical injuries • Missing or damaged belongings • Difficulty sleeping • Poor school performance • Decreased self-esteem • Negative self-talk • Frequent excuses for missing school

36 METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOVEMBER 2020

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