MetroFamily Magazine. OKC Family Fun & Resources. Local events calendar.
Wrap Up Holiday Fun Top light displays, winter festivals and seasonal day trips
NOVEMBER/DECEMBER 2023
Gifts that Do Good Support local nonprofits, attractions and shops
Tidings of Great Joy Get to know OKC’s Santa Blair
18 christmas eve services
Bring your friends and family to celebrate Christmas and remember the miracle of Jesus’ birth at a Crossings Candlelight service! To view service times, listen to Christmas music, explore holiday events available for the whole family and more, visit crossings.church/christmas. december 23 & 24
crossings.church/christmas For Christmas Eve service times and locations, visit
REGULAR SUNDAY SCHEDULE: CROSSINGS EDMOND (1500 W COVELL, 73003) // 9:30 & 11AM CROSSINGS OKC (14600 N PORTLAND AVE, 73134) // 9:30 & 11AM CROSSINGS CENTER (10255 N PENNSYLVANIA AVE, 73120) // 11AM
CROSSINGS.CHURCH
Storytimes, crafts, and more at Metro Library!
Whether your kiddos are interested in STEM, music, storytimes or crafts, we have the program for you and more! Visit metrolibrary.org to find an event happening near you!
Metro Library takes you places.
metrolibrary.org | (405) 231-8650
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Features 12 METROFAMILY’S 2024 COVER KIDS Introducing the winners of our annual search 14 ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE Opportunities for families to volunteer together in the metro 18 JOY IN THE JOURNEY Making a hospital feel like home for the holidays 20 LET THERE BE PEACE ON EARTH 3 harmony-building strategies for children and families 22 STEPPING UP Moore parents share the blessings of serving as a foster family 28 GIFTS THAT DO GOOD Support metro nonprofits, attractions and shops this season 48 FACES OF METROFAMILY Meet community leaders behind local businesses Departments 10 NEW & NOW Get to know OKC’s Santa Blair 16 FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS
PHOTO BY KRISTI HOWARD PHOTOGRAPHY
From the cover 24, 36 & 58 WRAP UP HOLIDAY FUN
10
10 TIDINGS OF GREAT JOY 28 GIFTS THAT DO GOOD
28
6 tips to care for the mental well-being of aging relatives
24 LOCAL FAMILY FUN
Plan a merry OKC holiday season with our family fun itinerary
PHOTO BY WITHUNMIND PHOTOGRAPHY
PHOTO COURTESY OF CATALYST COOKIES BY REMERGE
36 CALENDAR OF EVENTS Find holiday magic at local light displays, productions and festivals 56 REAL PARENTS OF THE METRO Community members share favorite things to do, address local issues
36
58 EXPLORING OKLAHOMA WITH CHILDREN
Take a road trip to 3 Oklahoma towns for quirky & bright Christmas traditions
62 LAST LOOK
5 of our favorite holiday gifts for kids
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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
I have a confession to make: my journalism career has officially peaked and it will all be downhill from here. I recently had the opportunity to interview the biggest celebrity of my tenure at MetroFamily: Santa! Oklahoma City’s Santa Blair began making appearances about 15 years ago. Often the first Black Santa local families have ever seen, he brings meaningful representation to the beloved figure — and inspires holiday magic for children of all races and ethnicities. Case in point, last December, my 8-year-old son and I were poring over Curbside Chronicle ’s feature story on Santa Blair. After intently studying the beautiful photos, my son looked up at me with wide eyes and declared, “Mom. This is the REAL Santa!” I asked Hutch what made him certain. Of course, he noted Santa Blair’s intricately beautiful suits, his authentic beard and the unmistakable twinkle in his eye. But what really caught his attention was Santa’s focus on serving others. Santa Blair visits hospitals and nursing homes, he provides cheer to children experiencing homelessness and he finds meaningful ways to include children with disabilities and special needs. Even his “day job” as a teacher and coach is about serving children! Santa Blair is a powerful symbol of hope, of peace, of inclusion, of love. Thank you, Santa Blair (and Hutch), for reminding me what’s most important this holiday season. It’s not the perfectly wrapped gifts,
2022
2022
Publisher Sarah Taylor Managing Editor Erin Page
MetroFamily Magazine is published bimonthly. Copyright 2023 by MetroFamily HoldCo, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Articles and advertisements in MetroFamily do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the magazine or MetroFamily HoldCo, LLC. We do not assume responsibility for statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. The acceptance of advertising by MetroFamily does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services, or information. We do not knowingly present any product or service which is fraudulent or misleading in nature. Assistant Editor Lindsay Cuomo Art Director Stacy Noakes Senior Project Manager Kirsten Holder Director of Events Casey Shupe Editorial Assistant Emiley Bainbridge Account Executive Dana Price Strategy Manager Morgan Harris Contributing Writer Angie LaPaglia Contributing Photographer Bridget Pipkin Contact us Mailing address: 6608 N. Western Ave., #458 Oklahoma City, OK 73116 Phone: 405-601-2081 tips@metrofamilymagazine.com www.metrofamilymagazine.com
THE PAGE CREW SHARES FAVORITE WAYS TO CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAYS ON PAGE 24 AND SERVE OTHERS IN THE COMMUNITY ON PAGE 14. beautifully plated dishes or cramming one more holiday activity into our frazzled schedules — it’s the joy found in loving and serving others well. May we all seek opportunities to do just that.
With great hope,
Erin Page Managing Editor
ON THE COVER Sixth grade twins Carter and Blakely and second grade younger sister Falyn are the winners of our 2023 Cover Kids Search in the siblings category! This energetic trio loves playing board games, beating their parents in spades and spreading kindness. Carter enjoys playing baseball, swimming, climbing, camping, playing video games and conquering Ninja Warrior obstacles. Blakely loves dancing, swimming competitively, singing, performing, crafting, writing and eating sushi. Falyn enjoys tumbling, dancing, swimming, reading and exploring. They are the children of Deidre and Evan, and their family loves to adventure at RIVERSPORT OKC and eat at Taco Nation.
Proud member of
Oklahoma City Chamber of Commerce & Edmond Chamber of Commerce
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 5
OFF THE PAGES
COMMEMORATE Native Heritage MONTH From festivals and special events to history curriculum and resources, find opportunities to celebrate your own Native heritage or learn about Native culture during November and beyond at metrofamilymagazine.com/ native-heritage-month.
PHOTO BY FOTO ARTS PHOTOGRAPHY
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Earn CASH when you sell us the toys, clothes, and equipment your kids have outgrown!
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NORTH OKLAHOMA CITY 13801 N. PENNSYLVANIA AVE OKLAHOMA CITY, OK 73134 405-286-3114 | VISIT US ONLINE
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Your holidays just got brighter — because MetroFamily’s Ultimate Holiday Giveaway is back! Enter for a chance to win one of three packages from our partners, with prizes like: • 3-night stay at Chateau on the Lake Resort in Branson, Mo., plus tickets to Silver Dollar City, Polar Express FlyRide and the Titanic Museum Attraction • 2-night stay at the Gaylord Texan in Grapevine, Texas, plus tickets to ICE • VOYA™ Quad Stroller Wagon from Radio Flyer ENTER THE Ultimate Holiday Giveaway!
4 Locations to Serve You! Edmond • Yukon • OKC
• Fisher-Price DC Batwheels Launch & Race Batcave • Tickets to local attractions such as Mr. Gatti’s Pizza, OKCPhil, Allison’s Fun and much more Plus, toys, games and local attraction passes!
Enter daily Dec. 1-12. metrofamilymagazine.com/contests
Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town
Looking for the big guy this holiday season? Santa is busy, but he’ll be popping up in venues around OKC. Get Santa’s full itinerary at metrofamilymagazine. com/where-to-find-santa-in-okc.
Call 405-840-1686 to schedule an evaluation!
Festive Favorites Get in the holiday spirit with our Winter Fun Guides! Find dazzling local light displays, cold weather fun, cultural celebrations, Christmas tree farms, festivals and much more at metrofamilymagazine.com/winter.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 7
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Begins Dec. 26
While we did not hold our popular Geekapalooza STEAM Festival in 2023 (because we’ve outgrown our location and we’re working to bring you an even bigger, better event in 2024!), we do have an exciting opportunity for you to enjoy all the FREE benefits of Geekapalooza, beginning Dec. 26! Geekapalooza Blitz includes a brand new contest with fabulous STEAM-related prizes; weekly science experiments released through our website, social media channels and e-newsletter; and a passport of local coupons and incentives valued at more than $100. Geekapalooza Blitz is sponsored by The University of Oklahoma College of Pharmacy. Learn more at metrofamilymagazine.com/geekapalooza.
GIVE THE GIFT MEMBERSHIP. of — —
Seniors Couples Families Events Kids Life
A membership to the YMCA opens the doors to health, wellness and community. Discover new ways to connect with activities for all ages – exercise, nutrition, youth sports, camp, after school programs, volunteering and more! The Gift of Health, Wellness & Community!
A gift to the Y gives back. ymcaokc.org/holidaygivingguide
fotoartsphotography.com • (405) 326-1533
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Sign up for MetroFamily’s FREE e-newsletter to receive: Our primary goal at MetroFamily is to make life easier for local parents. Because parents are often overwhelmed and inundated with information and advice, we make your mornings easy by delivering bite-size timely news, family fun ideas and real-life parenting tips straight to your email inbox.
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frugal family fun ideas, festivals, school break camps and more
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METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 9
NEW & NOW
Kenny Blair wears many hats. He’s a father and grandfather. He’s a coach and teacher at Douglass High School, in the same school district he grew up in. Raised by his grandmother, he attended Classen High School and then went on to play football for the University of Missouri. After eight years playing professional ball for the Philadelphia Eagles, he worked as an athletic trainer for the Disney Institute, where he trained the likes of Shaquille O’Neil, Ray Lewis, Tiger Woods and members of the 1996 Dream Team. About 15 years ago, Blair added another hat to his rotation: that of Santa Claus. Known as Santa Blair, his eye-popping suits, passion for service and palpable joy in being Santa have expedited his celebrity far beyond Oklahoma. For many local children (and their parents and grandparents, too), Santa Blair is the first Black Santa they’ve ever seen. He provides the representation for children of color that he didn’t experience as a child — and represents to children of all colors that Santa is inclusive of everyone. Santa Blair’s special brand of holiday magic inspires people of all ages, colors and creeds. We caught up with the jolly man himself ahead of his busiest season of the year. What is the most meaningful part of being Santa? There are so many things! Being able to work with children who are in the hospital, being with homeless children who don’t even have a place for a Christmas tree or lights, being with children of color who have never seen an African American Santa. What has been the most memorable? When my former students bring their own kids to see me and say they are proud to have had me as their coach and Santa Blair. How is your role as teacher and coach similar to your role of Santa? It’s all about helping kids! When I’m teaching children on the field or in the classroom, I have an opportunity to make a positive influence in their lives. And I have that same opportunity as Santa. Tidings of Great JOY 8 Questions with Santa Blair BY ERIN PAGE . PHOTOS BY WITHUNMIND PHOTOGRAPHY, COURTESY OF SANTA BLAIR.
SANTA BLAIR PROVIDES THE REPRESENTATION FOR CHILDREN OF COLOR THAT HE DIDN'T EXPERIENCE AS A CHILD.
Why is the representation you provide so important?
As a child growing up, I never saw a Black Santa. It’s important for children to see a Santa who looks like them. Representation is not just for African American children because I influence children of all colors, and that is such a blessing. When I was at Disney World last year, even grandmothers, of all colors, would tell me they had never seen a Black Santa. They were so delighted and it was a gift to be part of their family photos. I’m thankful for the opportunity to make a change and make people smile. What’s your message to the children of Oklahoma City this holiday season? Santa Blair loves them all and I want to make all their wishes come true! Santa Blair does not have a naughty list. I believe every child is good. And even if they’re a little naughty, they are still nice!
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NEW & NOW
You are known for your intricate, incredibly beautiful Santa suits — how many do you have? Almost 30! From the buttons to the thread, I design all my own suits and they are made here locally. I just released a memorial Chadwick Boseman suit because so many children love Black Panther. Sometimes the children help me design my suits — like my new toy suit, where one side is dedicated to Barbie dolls and the other to Hot Wheels. What’s your favorite treat for children to leave for you on Christmas Eve? Yellow cake with chocolate icing! What do YOU want for Christmas? My dream is to one day be the Santa for the White House.
Find out more about Santa Blair, including where he will be appearing this holiday season, at thesantablair.com.
SANTA BLAIR DESIGNS EVERY DETAIL OF HIS SUITS, WHICH ARE MADE LOCALLY. HIS BLACK PANTHER SUIT (LEFT), A TRIBUTE TO CHADWICK BOSEMAN, IS ONE OF HIS NEWEST.
The 2023 Oklahoma nutcracker The Norman Ballet Company Presents Featuring Guest Artists
Nancy O’Brian Center for the Performing Arts 1801 Stubbeman, Norman, OK https://www.ticketstorm.com 1-866-966-1777 All tickets available at
Alexa Maxwell and Jovani Furlan New York City Ballet Saturday, December 2, 7:00 PM Sunday, December 3, 3:00 PM
All seats reserved: $20, $25, $30
The Sand Plum Fairy Tea Party is back! Sunday, December 3, 1:00 PM
Tickets $35
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 11
The Oklahoma City metro is not short on kids with dazzling smiles, bright personalities and kind hearts! We loved meeting each and every child who participated in our 2024 Cover Kids Search contest. After the registration period, our readers and fans voted on their favorite Cover Kid hopefuls in each age category, selecting our finalists who were then interviewed by a panel of local community leaders. Thank you to everyone who entered and voted! − ANNOUNCING METROFAMILY’S − 2024 Cover Kids! BY ERIN PAGE . PHOTOS PROVIDED.
Scarlett
Naomi
Scarlett is the winner of our 2024 Cover Kids contest in the 4-5 age category. In PreK in Nicoma Park, she loves to dance, swim, camp, fish, read and participate in gymnastics. Empathetic and kind, Scarlett helps take care of the family chickens, donkeys and garden. Scarlett is the daughter of Carly and Brandon and big sister to Wilder. Together, her family enjoys hiking at Martin Park Nature Center, watching the Dodgers play at Chickasaw Bricktown Ballpark and visiting the Choctaw Library for story time.
Naomi is the winner of our 2024 Cover Kids contest in the 6-7 age category. A first grader in Edmond, Naomi enjoys math and art, plus she plays soccer, basketball, golf and tennis. She is curious and determined, asks lots of questions and likes to figure out how things work. Naomi looks up to her big sister and helps with
her two younger siblings, so it’s no surprise she wants to be a PreK teacher when she grows up. Naomi is the daughter of Larissa and Ervell, and her family enjoys spending time together at Science Museum Oklahoma and Frontier City.
BJ is the winner of our 2024 Cover Kids contest in the 8-9 age category. He is a homeschooled third grader who likes to get dressed up in a suit to eat at local restaurants, with Glamour being his favorite. BJ is the son of Tamika and Billy. He loves to rollerblade at Myriad Gardens with his mom, play basketball at Scissortail Park, beatbox and sing, practice his flips at the trampoline park and play Fortnite. BJ enjoys being silly and he believes everyone should be themselves because we are all unique. BJ
Thomas
Thomas is the winner of our 2024 Cover Kids contest in the 10-12 age category. In seventh grade in Edmond, he enjoys the challenge of his gifted and talented class. Thomas is an avid fisherman, plays soccer, likes to read, enjoys participating in his church youth group and is a whiz at solving Rubik’s Cubes. His favorite place to visit in the metro is Arcadia Lake. Thomas’ dream is to attend the Air Force Academy and become a pilot. He has three siblings and is the son of Ashley and Jeff.
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Brothers Mason & Aiden will also appear on one of our covers in 2024. Readers will recognize them as the sons of MetroFamily travel writer and photographer Debbie Murnan and her husband, Patrick. The family enjoys chasing adventures, like exploring, hiking, trying new restaurants, dancing and volunteering.
Mia & Millie are the winners of our 2024 Cover Kids contest in the siblings category. Mia is a seventh grader who is involved in FCCLA, cross country and track. She loves animals, baking, playing board games and boba tea. Millie is in the second grade and loves to swim, go to the lake, catch critters, eat Oreos and make her family laugh. Both girls play soccer year round and their parents describe them as resilient, brave and kind. Millie underwent Mia & Millie
open heart surgery in August 2022 and Mia has been her biggest supporter. The girls are the daughters of Katie and Nick, and their family’s favorite place to hang out is Scissortail Park.
Watch for MetroFamily’s 2025 Cover Kids Search beginning in mid-July 2024.
JOIN US FOR THIS IMMERSIVE AND INTERACTIVE STORYTELLING EXPERIENCE. Preston Singletary (American Tlingit, born 1963). Gagaan Awutáawu Yéil (Raven Steals the Sun), 2008. Blown, hot-sculptued, and sand-carved glass; 9 1/2 x 26 x 9 1/2 in. Collection of Museum of Glass, Tacoma, gift of the artist. Photo by Russell Johnson.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 13
Attitude of Gratitude 10 ways to give back as a family BY ERIN PAGE . PHOTOS PROVIDED. Volunteering as a family is a meaningful way to spend time together and give back. Check out these heart-warming options for kids and families in the metro by age.
Elementary Kids The Regional Food Bank of Oklahoma offers high- energy, high-reward opportunities for kids ages 8 and up to sort and pack food for those in need in our community. Join a shift as a family, or sign up with a group. Volunteers under the age of 16 must be accompanied by an adult. Find opportunities for families, individuals and groups at regionalfoodbank.org/volunteer.
Toddlers & Preschoolers Spread the love of reading through Booksgiving! In partnership with Little Read Wagon , every Friday in November families can hide new or gently used books in area parks for other children to find. Books are packaged with a note explaining the book is free to the finder. Get more information at littlereadwagonok.com. While not as many organized opportunities exist for this age group, there are plenty of developmentally-appropriate ways to introduce the idea of volunteerism. Plan a day to pick up trash at your favorite local park (and invite friends and neighbors to join you), gather gently used toys to deliver to Infant Crisis Services or host a drive to collect items for a nonprofit with a mission that resonates with your little one (collect pet food donations for Pet Food Pantry or items for the individuals served by Homeless Alliance ).
Every Second Saturday, February through November, families can join Restore OKC for a community workday. Projects include gardening, basic home repairs and making deliveries to seniors. Children ages 5 and up are welcome to participate. Shifts are from 8:30 a.m. to noon and include breakfast and lunch. Find out more at volunteer.restoreokc.org.
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Tweens & Teens Prepare a hot meal as a family for the youth served by Sisu Youth Services . Sisu is a low-barrier, identity-affirming space in Oklahoma City where unhoused, transition-age youth can access shelter and support. Volunteers prepare and drop off meals for 30 to 35 youth once daily and twice daily on Saturdays. Email volunteer@sisuyouth.org to sign up.
FESTIVE FAMILY PROGRAMS
Nov. 11 | Second Saturday: 3-D Landscapes | 1-4 p.m.
Nov. 25 | Family Tours and Art Kits (while supplies last) Dec. 9 | Second Saturday XL : Snow Glow | 1-5 p.m.
Make Thanksgiving memorable for the homebound. Other Options, Inc. provides food, resources, services and education to at-risk individuals and families affected by HIV and AIDS. Kids ages 10 and up (with direct adult supervision) can help prepare Cookie’s Thanksgiving meals during 2-hour shifts in November. Families can also sign up to deliver meals on Thanksgiving Day and/or help by donating frozen turkeys. Learn more at otheroptionsokc.org.
Dec. 2, 9 and 16 | Hours extended until 7 p.m. for Lights on Broadway
Kids have a unique opportunity to work directly with the patrons they are serving at Skyline’s Food Resource Center. Volunteers welcome patrons, assist them in shopping and bag their groceries. This interactive process helps dispel myths about individuals who need help in our community. Kids under 10 can volunteer with direct adult supervision, ages 10 to 13 should have one adult volunteer with them and ages 14 and up can volunteer without an adult leader. Find out more at okcskyline.org/volunteer.
Dec. 8-10 | Artisan Market
405.951.0000 | okcontemp.org 11 NW 11th St, OKC, OK 73103
Find our full list of family volunteer opportunities in the metro here.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 15
FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS
Healthy Aging 6 steps to support the mental health of older relatives
BY ERIN PAGE. SPONSORED BY
Many metro parents are in the unique position of caring for their children and caring for aging parents or grandparents. While physical health concerns can certainly mount as we age, mental health struggles can be a silent and often under-detected problem for the aging population. We spoke with Bonnie Campo, senior director of public relations for the Oklahoma Department of Mental Health & Substance Abuse Services, about the most important ways to support the mental health of aging family members. 1. Include aging loved ones in holiday celebrations — and throughout the year. When families are together for the holidays, discuss resolutions for including older relatives in family fun during the upcoming year. That could include setting a time for weekly or monthly calls or FaceTimes and planning activities such as regular meals, coffee or walks together. For families who don’t live close to each other, get creative to enjoy each others’ presence during the holiday season. FaceTime to watch the opening of gifts, play online games or bake a special dish over Zoom. Then, extend that spirit of togetherness throughout the year. “My husband’s mother lives in Florida, so, for my family, we call multiple times a week – that’s the only time she sees her granddaughter until we make it to Florida,” said Campo. “We also send cards and care packages and then open them on the calls together. Those phone calls bring us together even when distance divides us.” 2. Be aware of the signs. As individuals age, it can be challenging to determine if a symptom is a sign of a physical health problem or is actually a mental health issue. Symptoms of physical, mental and cognitive issues can often overlap. Campo advises to watch aging relatives for incremental differences that could indicate a mental health issue, including changes in appearance, like a drastic hair cut, reduced attention to personal hygiene or sudden weight gain or loss. Pulling away from social situations, isolation and losing interest in activities they once enjoyed are also key signs. An individual who’s received a difficult health diagnosis or who is experiencing grief over the loss of a spouse, friend or job can be at risk for mental health struggles.
“Loss tends to be great when you are in the aging population,” said Campo. “Sometimes we think they’ve experienced so much loss that they know how to handle it, but it can still be overwhelming, especially when considering loss as it relates not only to people but also to the loss of autonomy, hearing, mobility, vision and so on.” 3. Understand the risk of suicide. In Oklahoma, 872 suicides were reported in 2022, the highest Campo has seen on record. Ages 65+ accounted for 20 percent of those deaths by suicide, the second highest age group in the state, according to ODMHSAS. “We see this predominantly with older, white men,” said Campo. “This is a group that doesn’t always talk about their feelings. We are trying to encourage that it’s OK to talk to someone and they don’t have to do this alone. Older populations tend to create a plan, so we have to reach them before the first attempt.”
Signs an aging relative might be considering suicide: • Giving away personal items. For aging relatives this could include clearing out their home. • Withdrawing from family and friends, saying goodbyes or isolating themselves. • Making abrupt appearance changes. In the aging population, this could include neglecting hygiene. • Engaging in risky behaviors. This could include substance use or risky financial behavior. • Losing interest in things they once loved, including activities and relationships. • Talking about wanting to die, being a burden, having no reason to live or ending the pain. If you see or hear these signs or have any concerns a loved one could be considering suicide, call or text 988 immediately.
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FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS
4. Create space for conversation. Ask your aging loved one how they are doing — and really listen. Whether they’ve received a recent health diagnosis, have a challenging physical health condition, have lost someone close to them, retired from their job or just seem unlike their usual self, provide a safe space for them to share their feelings, and then affirm that what they’re going through is hard. “We believe talk saves lives,” said Campo. “These are the generations that were taught to pull themselves up by their boot straps, so they may not be vocalizing mental health challenges." Rather than speaking in directives, like “you should” or “if you would only,” position yourself as a teammate ready to assist them in seeking help because you care about them. 5. Encourage mental well-being. Talk with aging loved ones about incorporating practices like regular self-care, mindfulness and breathing techniques into their daily lives to enhance their mental well-being. Making time for consistent exercise, which could include walking or stretching, can help manage stress, anxiety and depression, as can staying connected to friends and family. Learning a new hobby, volunteering for a cause and prioritizing other activities they enjoy will also promote positive mental health.
6. Seek supportive resources. The most important step family members can take is to connect aging relatives with mental health concerns to a trained behavioral health professional. According to the Association on Aging, as many as 70 percent of primary care visits for older adults are actually driven by psychological factors, like anxiety, depression or stress. While older adults in psychological distress utilize health care at a rate two to three times higher than non-distressed people, they’re often not screened for underlying causes of complaints. “We’ve found that 45 percent of people who died by suicide had seen their primary care physician within 30 days, but less than 1 percent of those had been seen in our certified community behavior clinics,” said Campo. “This tells us connecting people to evidence-based treatment really works.” Call or text 988 to be connected with trained behavioral health specialists who will listen to your concerns and help formulate a plan with actionable next steps. 988 is a beneficial resource both for the caregiver and for the parent or grandparent they’re caring for to connect with someone to talk to. Learn more about 988 at 988Oklahoma.com. Editor’s note: This article is part of a 10-month series of articles and podcasts with 988 Mental Health Lifeline. Find the full series at metrofamilymagazine.com/mental-health. CHRISTMAS MORNING DELIGHT!
Optometrists and dry eye experts Dr. Kim Hefner & Dr. Victoria Fairchild can help alleviate this painful condition! Hefner Eye Care 5757 NW 132nd St, OKC 405-728-8853 hefnereyecare.com Call for your appointment today!
learning tree
7638 N. Western, OKC • 405-848-1415 @learningtree.okc • learningtreeokc.com
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / NOV-DEC 2023 17
BEN, BECCA AND 10-YEAR-OLD JOYANNA. PHOTOS PROVIDED.
JOY in the Journey Community support makes a hospital feel like home for the holidays
SPONSORED BY
“As parents, we believe there is no other place like Bethany Children’s,” said Becca Logue. “I’m sure there are great pediatric facilities, but we are most assured in the care here because Bethany Children’s acknowledges that a child’s worth comes from God and asks for His help in the care of the children.” This Christmas, because traditional holiday trips or activities can be difficult for a child with complex medical needs, Becca and her husband, Ben, consider celebrations from Joyanna’s perspective. “There are times when having a child with special needs requires a special mindset,” said Becca. “The holiday activities at Bethany Children’s and the friends that Joyanna will celebrate Christmas with will bring her so much joy. We love this for her!” The hospital’s annual giving campaign, Joy of Christmas, offers individuals, churches and other community groups the opportunity to purchase gifts for patients or wish list items selected by therapists and educators at Bethany Children’s. Online purchasing from the hospital’s lists is made simple through Amazon, and items are delivered directly to Bethany Children’s in time for holiday celebrations and gift opening.
This Christmas will look different for one local family as they plan to create a meaningful holiday celebration with a daughter in the hospital. This is not the first time the Logue family has faced a long-term hospitalization for a child. Their son, Philip, was diagnosed with Neuronal Ceroid Lipofuscinoses (NCL), a genetic disorder of the nerve cells. At age 8, he was hospitalized for nine months before he lost his battle with the disorder. The Logue’s 10-year-old daughter, Joyanna, also inherited NCL and is being treated at Bethany Children’s Health Center. The nonprofit pediatric hospital specializes in 24-hour complex care and pediatric rehabilitation. Originally founded as an orphanage in 1898, the organization remains faithful to the mission of founder Mattie Mallory and provides long-term care for children with complex medical needs, becoming a second home for these families. The Logues have embraced the mission of Bethany Children’s and have faith in the care of their child.
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Knowing that Bethany Children’s has support from the community is especially meaningful to the Logues. “Everyone wants to be understood and appreciated,” shared Becca. “When you walk through emotional times, it’s great to know that someone has your back. God has given us a great support system, including the staff at Bethany Children’s, but it’s always encouraging to know there are others who care and feel passionately about bringing joy to others at this time of year.” As she reflects on the upcoming holiday celebrations, Becca adds: “It is so neat to think that someone who is not connected to our family can purchase wish list items that will directly affect our child.” For families like the Logues, financial support for Bethany Children’s is also greatly appreciated. “When caring for children with special needs, there are always new innovations and therapies that are costly but will have a big impact on their quality of life — we need help with those,” said Becca. “The leadership of Bethany Children’s has such a vision for excellence in care. Donations from the community can help those visions materialize. Whatever is given, we are grateful for how it helps Bethany Children’s to continue their excellent and comprehensive care for our child.” For more information or to donate to Bethany Children’s Health Center’s Joy of Christmas campaign, visit bethanychildrens.org/joy- of-christmas.
BECCA IS GRATEFUL FOR THE JOY-FILLED HOLIDAY SEASON BETHANY CHILDREN'S HEALTH CENTER CREATES FOR PATIENTS LIKE JOYANNA AND THEIR FAMILIES.
Nightly 6 p.m. - 11 p.m. Located in City Park & Chisholm Trail Park
An illuminated tour of lights in Yukon, OK! November 18 – December 31 — Santa Express Train Rides — Nightly (Weather Permitting) | 6 pm - 10 pm Train Station located in Chisholm Trail Park! — Ice Skating Rink — Visit us online for more information. yukonicerink.com | Chisholm Trail Park — Drive Through The Lights — “Oklahoma’s largest drive-thru Christmas light display!” — Walk Through The Lights — Selfie Spots and Photo Opps
Visit us online and plan your trip. www.yukonchristmas.com
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@cityofyukonok
@cityofyukonokgov
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Don’t Be BULLIED by the Holidays
Not long ago, I was introduced to an anti- bullying organization called Heroes In Waiting. I thought I’d already seen every anti-bullying message and video out there, but a couple things really struck me about this particular organization’s message. First, they do away with the labels of “bully” and “victim” and instead focus on behavior. They teach that behavior isn’t the person, and behavior can be changed. Also, they’re very clear that bullying behavior always includes a power differential: one individual trying to exert power over another. Those lessons made me think about this season and how so many times we allow the demands of the holidays – programs and activities, family pressures and obligations – to hold power over our families at a time that should be peaceful, reflective and joyful. Sometimes the bullying behavior we experience actually comes from ourselves. In that spirit, here are three ways to build harmony in your hosuehold this holiday season and beyond. 3 ways to promote peace in your household BY ANGIE LAPAGLIA
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Slow Down We’ve all been there: It’s 5:40 on the evening of the holiday program, your 7-year-old is refusing to let you brush her hair and she’s having a meltdown for the ages … you’re supposed to have her in the choir room at 6 p.m. One of the first things developmental pediatrician Dr. Mark Bertin tells overwhelmed parents is to slow down. Take a step back, ask what and who is contributing to the situation and put things in perspective. Is your daughter short on sleep? Has she already been to rehearsals two nights this week? Are you under pressure because you have a huge project due tomorrow and don’t really have time for this tonight? Stopping for a minute to survey the
situation always brings clarity. In this case, your daughter is probably exhausted. She doesn’t want to put on her “good clothes,” get out in the cold and perform for a bunch of strangers. And neither do you. Take a minute to acknowledge that and get through the evening together. Next, put the situation in perspective. What’s the worst thing that could happen? She gets to the choir room at 6:05 instead of 6 p.m.? Not life- altering. She’ll get in line and be on the bleachers just like everyone else’s kids. Her hair’s messy? The video you get will be historic, and you’ll have an awesome story to tell.
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Remember: Calm is Contagious Former Navy Commander Rorke T. Denver tells a story about the final day of his Navy SEAL training when things were going completely sideways. The ranking officer was screaming his head off, and the students were responding with even more pandemonium. That’s when a master chief petty officer gathered the team together and told them something Denver never forgot: Calm is contagious. If the person in charge stays calm, the people looking up to them stay calm. If the person in charge is exuding chaos, the people looking up to them follow suit. It’s not just calm that is contagious — panic, stress and worry are, too. And for more intimate relationships, like those between parents and children, the correlation is even stronger. Kids don’t just mimic your reaction, they amplify it. This brings me back to Heroes In Waiting. One of their free lessons teaches kids they have the power to create more of the feelings they want and less of the feelings they don’t want by doing simple things like taking a deep breath, being nice to themselves and learning to respond to stressful situations in a way that’s helpful instead of destructive. That’s pretty great advice for us parents in this season, too. Editor’s note: For more information about bullying behavior and kids’ mental wellness all year long, check out the free curriculum, videos and resources at heroesinwaiting.org.
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Unsubscribe from Perfection Newsflash: There’s no such thing as perfection. When we feel completely out of control, our tendency is to look at everyone else’s “perfect” kids in the holiday program and feel like we’re failing as parents. That’s exactly when we need to take a little advice from the experts: Don’t compare your insides to everyone else’s outsides. The outsides aren’t always real. What is real is that life is messy, we’re all doing the best we can and sometimes – especially around stressful times like the holidays – life and little ones have other plans. At those times, the most helpful thing we can do is to let go of the false ideal that is perfection. In fact, according to mindfulness psychologist Dr. Elisha Goldstein, unsubscribing from perfectionism actually sets a good example for our kids. As role models for our little sponges, we can powerfully model for them that imperfection is a normal part of life.
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TUES-SAT 10:00 AM - 5:00 PM SUN 1:00 PM - 5:00 PM
www.jasminemoran.com | 405.382.0950 1714 W Wrangler Blvd | Seminole, OK
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MetroFamily began extensive reporting on Oklahoma’s foster care system in 2015. At that time, there were 9,500 children in foster care with 5,243 approved foster homes in the state. Since 2015, the number of children in state custody has been reduced dramatically, primarily due to intensive safety services provided to families in their homes, in many cases eliminating the need for children to enter the foster care system. Oklahoma now reports a 20-year low with 6,195 children in custody. According to Oklahoma Human Services, keeping children in their homes while professionals work with families on safety concerns, connect them to counseling and other services, and focus on prevention services improves social, behavioral, developmental and well-being outcomes for children, reduces their future reliance on government assistance and reduces criminal and juvenile justice system involvement. “Our prevention services, like intensive safety services, have had incredible success rates – 80 percent in state fiscal year 2022 – while supporting families without removal of their children,” said Casey White, external communications and media relations administrator for Oklahoma Human Services. “More importantly, allowing children to remain safely in their homes is better and less traumatic for the children and their families.” Unfortunately, the number of approved foster homes in the state has decreased to 3,333, meaning Oklahoma still faces the challenge of not enough foster families to meet the current need. “Our goal is to recruit enough foster families that we have multiple families to choose from and can find the best fit for every child who comes into state custody,” said White. “We need more foster parents who are willing to take teens, kids with special needs and sibling groups. These are the children who are hardest to place and need families willing to meet them where they are.” The Carrington family of Moore has stepped up to meet these needs, and through their journey, they’ve gained much more than they’ve given. The Carrington Family BY ERIN PAGE . PHOTO PROVIDED BY THE CARRINGTON FAMILY. Stepping Up
Making the commitment After approval and in-depth training, Meagan and Michael Carrington accepted their first placement in June 2021, two sisters, who still live in their home. The Carringtons have been a safe place for 17 total girls, adopting two and cheering on others as they’ve returned to biological families. They currently have six girls in their home, plus Michael’s biological daughter. The Carringtons have a heart for fostering teenagers and children with greater behavioral needs, called Enhanced Foster Care, which required additional training. They have found some of their early fears about fostering to be unfounded, especially regarding managing the kids’ sometimes difficult behaviors and working with Oklahoma Human Services. Meagan appreciates that the agency doesn’t expect perfection — an attitude the Carringtons extend to the children in their care. “Raising these kids is just like raising your own kids,” said Meagan. “A lot of people get caught up in the kids’ behaviors or not wanting to deal with their [biological] families, but at the end of the day, they’re just kids.” The Carringtons enjoy teaching and instructing their teens to prepare for life as adults and note the girls’ eagerness to learn coping skills and healing strategies. “I tell them, we can’t erase the first part of your life – instead of erasing, you have to deal with it and be there for them," said Michael. When it comes to working with Oklahoma Human Services, the Carringtons have been intentional in building genuine relationships with their case workers and their kids’ therapists. Whether they need help getting a child to an appointment, advice on handling a situation or even immediate crisis management, support is always available. THE CARRINGTONS OF MOORE HAVE STEPPED UP TO FOSTER 17 CHILDREN (SOME PICTURED HERE) SINCE RECEIVING THEIR FIRST PLACEMENT IN 2021.
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Learn more about becoming a foster family and find more ways to help at okfosters.org.
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Setting expectations Their first night as foster parents, Michael didn’t sleep. He sat in the living room all night in case the girls needed him. He admits that the beginning of a placement can be awkward, when all parties are getting to know one other. The Carringtons focus on building structure, setting clear expectations and giving their kids space to simply be kids. “They just want to feel safe,” said Michael. “Once you get a schedule and routines down, they start to trust you.” The Carringtons have strict expectations about grades to help ensure the girls, once out of high school, can obtain good paying jobs, attend college through Oklahoma Promise (a program through which children in care can receive free tuition) and be set up for success without debt. Meagan says one of her foster daughters recently told her she didn’t care about her grades previously because no one had ever pushed her to do her best. “You have to help pave that road for them because many have abandonment and commitment issues, struggle with who to trust and have to learn how to be
accountable,” said Michael. “We have girls who want to be a judge or doctor, and their grades are what is going to help pay for that.” Meagan enjoys seeing the girls in their care get comfortable enough to pursue their passions. “You can tell you are really making a difference,” said Meagan. Caring in community When safe, the goal is always to bridge, or build relationships with, children’s birth families. Just as the Carringtons set expectations and boundaries with the children, they do the same with biological relatives. Their upfront, supportive manner, plus consistent communication, has resulted in lasting relationships. The Carringtons keep in touch with the families of children who’ve been reunited with biological relatives. Meagan sees herself as a lifelong support, offering parenting help and encouragement. “It’s not their fault,” said Meagan of biological parents whose kids are in care due to a lack of resources. “That doesn’t excuse what happened to their kids, but when they
take responsibility to fix their issues and get their kids back, I’m going to cheerlead because that’s what’s best for the kids." They also work hard to keep the kids in their home connected with siblings placed elsewhere. Two of their current placements have younger brothers with whom the Carringtons get together regularly. “It means a lot to us to keep the bond with them so they don’t feel they’ve been forgotten,” said Michael. Help for the holidays This holiday season is the Carringtons’ first with officially adopted kids. Michael says they all feel immense peace knowing the girls are in their forever home. The family has relied on groups like Oklahoma Human Services, Citizens Caring for Children and the Citizens Advisory Board in Norman to help with holiday gifts for the children in their care. In addition to considering becoming a foster family, local families can support foster families by volunteering with or donating to these groups this holiday season.
EXPERIENCE ALL-NEW HOLIDAY MAGIC! ALL-NEW Indoor Shows • Live, at Lyric’s Plaza Theatre!
NOVEMBER 24 to DECEMBER 24 DECEMBER 24
THE OFFICIAL STATE THEATRE OF OKLAHOMA (405) 524-9312 • www.LyricTheatreOKC.org
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LOCAL FAMILY FUN
A VERY OKC HOLIDAY Downtown’s best seasonal family fun BY ERIN PAGE . PHOTOS PROVIDED.
Get in the holiday spirit in the heart of Oklahoma City with a plethora of festive events and activities. Create your own family itinerary with these ideas and find even more seasonal fun at metrofamilymagazine.com/winter-fun-guides.
Light Up the Night Thursday, Nov. 16 Kick off the holiday season with Downtown in December’s annual OKC Tree Lighting Festival presented by Heartland, held from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. outside the Chickasaw Bricktown Ballpark. OKC’s Mayor David Holt and Santa Blair will light the tree, followed by holiday performances and plenty of FREE fun for the whole family.
PHOTO BY DOUG HOKE
Skate into the Season Saturday, Nov. 18
Take a spin around the Devon Ice Rink at Myriad Gardens during opening weekend. Opt for an evening skate to also enjoy the glittering lights, and then take a stroll throughout the grounds to see illuminated trees, pathways and lanterns. The Devon Ice Rink is open Nov. 17 through Feb. 4, 2024. The newly renovated Inasmuch Foundation Crystal Bridge Conservatory will be open late, until 7:30 p.m., on Fridays and Saturdays Nov. 24 through Dec. 22.
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LOCAL FAMILY FUN
Friday, Nov. 24 Lyric Theatre’s beloved A Christmas Carol returns to the Plaza Theatre for the first time in four years with all-new sets, costumes, lights, sounds and staging. Catch the opening night show, which runs Nov. 24 through Dec. 24.
Shop Small Business Saturday Saturday, Nov. 25 Celebrate Small Business Saturday at Midtown’s Holiday Pop-Up Shops , where you can find unique gifts for everyone on your list. Or simply enjoy the free festivities, like live music and visits from Santa. The Holiday Pop-Ups are located at the corner of NW 10th and Hudson and are open Friday, Saturday and Sunday from Nov. 24 through Dec. 17.
Sunday, Nov. 26 Take your pup to Midtown for FREE Santa Paws photo ops from 1 to 3 p.m.!
Sing with Santa Saturday, Dec. 2
Sing along with Santa at Myriad Gardens! In addition to singing songs, enjoy story time, crafts and, of course, hanging out with Santa. Sing Along with Santa is offered Dec. 2, 9 and 16 from 10 a.m. to 12 p.m. in the Visitor Lobby of the Inasmuch Crystal Bridge Conservatory.
Saturday, Dec. 2 Kids ages 8 and under can race in the FREE Kids’ Dash as part of the Saints Santa Run. Events begin at 8 a.m. and include a 1-mile fun run, 5k, costume contest and FREE face painting, balloon art, snacks and more.
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