MetroFamily Magazine. OKC Family Fun & Resources. Local events calendar.
SEPT/OCT 2022
Pumpkin patches, outdoor adventure and fall break travel ideas GUIDE Fun Fall
A Park for Everyone Get the scoop on Scissortail Park’s new additions
Embracing Neurodiversity Supports and inclusion for neurodivergent thinkers
Primrose School of Southwest Oklahoma City 1520 SW 119 TH | Oklahoma City, OK 73170 405.793.6000 | PrimroseSWOklahomaCity.com Primrose School of Edmond 15000 North Western Ave. | Edmond, OK 73013 405.285.6787 | PrimroseEdmond.com To enroll your child or join our team, contact us today. A place of love, laughter and learning. At Primrose®, our top priority is creating a positive and safe environment for every child, teacher and staff member. Our classrooms combine smaller student-teacher ratios with our Balanced Learning® approach to help every child flourish through purposeful play and nurturing guidance.
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Features 10 CARING FOR CAREGIVERS
Ronald McDonald House Charities® impacts local families in monumental ways
12 PRIMITIVE PARENTING TIPS
What ancient cultures can tell us about raising happy, healthy humans
22 FALL FUN GUIDE
Autumn adventures from our advertising partners 46 EMBRACING NEURODIVERSITY Classroom supports and inclusion for neurodivergent students 52 MONEY MATTERS Teaching kids financial literacy 56 UNDERSTANDING GENDER DIVERSITY Conversation starters for kids and families
PUMPKINVILLE AT MYRIAD GARDENS
CHESTER’S PARTY BARN
22 FALL FUN GUIDE
Departments 14 FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS
Alcohol, marijuana and vaping: what your kids need to know
OKLAHOMA STATE FAIR
16 LOCAL FAMILY FUN
On the Cover FALL FUN GUIDE pages 22, 30 & 58 A PARK FOR EVERYONE page 16 EMBRACING NEURODIVERSITY page 46
Get the scoop on Scissortail Park’s new additions
20 REAL DADS OF THE METRO
Educator and community advocate D’Andre Foster prioritizes intentional parenting
30 CALENDAR OF EVENTS
Festivals, fairs and trick-or-treat hot spots
58 EXPLORING OKLAHOMA WITH CHILDREN Experience autumn outdoors in Tahlequah and Muskogee 62 LAST LOOK 5 treasured fall family traditions
30
TINKERFEST AT SCIENCE MUSEUM OKLAHOMA
4 METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022
Pumpkin spice and all things nice: LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
2021
2021
it’s fall, y’all! In the midst of reveling in my favorite season, I have a confession to make: before I had kids, I was one of those know-it-alls who felt entirely confident in my future mothering abilities. There’s no more perfect parent than one who doesn’t yet have kids — amiright?!? Three colicky babies over five years taught me many humbling lessons about myself as a mom and a person — not the least of which is that to be the the kind of parent I aspire to, I have to rely on the experts and community around me. When I do, my kids are better for it. As my babies have grown, the parenting lessons I seek have become less about sleep and potty training and more about raising empathetic, inclusive humans who are informed and empowered to make good choices. If, like me, you’re a parent who needs tips on teaching your kids financial literacy, explaining the dangers of alcohol, vaping and marijuana or understanding gender diversity, you’ll find expert advice on these subjects and more in this issue. Plus, if you parent a neurodivergent thinker, learn more about supportive classroom environments and accommodations to help them excel. (And if you parent of a typically developing child, learn how to understand and include people who are neurodiverse in your corner of the world.)
2021
2021
Publisher Sarah Taylor Managing Editor Erin Page Assistant Editor Lindsay Cuomo Contributing Writers Toni Allen, April Deocariza, David Dinsmore, Lance Evans, Dr. Ronneal Mathews, Pam McKeown, Debbie Murnan Contributing Photographer
I wish your family a happy season of cooler temps, vibrant fall foliage, autumn adventures as detailed in these pages — and an affirming community to come alongside and support you in your parenting journey. With gratitude, OUR FAMILY LOVES TO WELCOME AUTUMN AT THE WINGS FALL FESTIVAL.
Bridget Pipkin Art Director Stacy Noakes Senior Project Manager Kirsten Holder Director of Events Casey Shupe Editorial Assistant Emiley Bainbridge Account Executive Dana Price Contact us Mailing address: 6608 N. Western Ave., #458 Oklahoma City, OK 73116 Phone: 405-601-2081 tips@metrofamilymagazine.com www.metrofamilymagazine.com
Erin Page Managing Editor
ON THE COVER Sufyan is the winner of our 2022 Cover Kids Search in the 6-7 age category! He is in the second grade at Western Gateway School and he wants to be an astronaut and deliver babies when he grows up. He’s exceptional at running track, has competed at the state level and is one of the fastest kids in his age group in Oklahoma. Sufyan also enjoys playing t-ball and basketball as well as swimming and participating in gymnastics. He’s learning Arabic and Spanish and loves all things about dinosaurs and space. Sufyan is the son of Jihan and Masood and little brother of twins Ahmad and Ma’isah. The family’s favorite place to visit in OKC is Scissortail Park, which was, fittingly, the site of Sufyan’s photoshoot. Special thanks to clothing sponsor Sundara Kids!
MetroFamily Magazine is published bimonthly. Copyright 2022 by MetroFamily HoldCo, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Articles and advertisements in MetroFamily do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the magazine or MetroFamily HoldCo, LLC. We do not assume responsibility for statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. The acceptance of advertising by MetroFamily does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services, or information. We do not knowingly present any product or service which is fraudulent or misleading in nature.
Proud member of
Oklahoma City Chamber of Commerce & Edmond Chamber of Commerce
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 5
OFF THE PAGES
Picture your child on MetroFamily’s cover! Enter our Cover Kids search by Sept. 30 We are looking for local kids ages 2 to 12 with big smiles and bright personalities to feature on a MetroFamily cover in 2023! Entering is easy : upload a photo of your child, answer a few “about me” questions and submit a $10 fee per entry, which provides your whole family access to a virtual swag bag with prizes, activities and coupons, valued at $150. Readers will vote on their favorite Cover Kids submissions in early October, and the top five finalists from each age category will be interviewed virtually by a panel of local judges.
COVER KIDS IS GENEROUSLY SPONSORED BY
We can’t wait to meet your Cover Kid hopefuls! Enter today at metrofamilymagazine.com/coverkidssearch.
Calling costumed kids!
Whether cute, creepy or comical, we want to see your kids’ Halloween costumes! Starting Oct. 1, snap a pic of your child (or entire family!) and upload it to our Halloween Photo Contest by Oct. 31 at midnight. Then vote on your favorites Nov. 1 through 4. Prizes include a family stay at the Gaylord Texan Resort in Grapevine, Texas, a family membership to Myriad Botanical Gardens and vehicle passes and pavilion rental from Arcadia Lake. Find out more and enter at metrofamily- magazine.com/halloween-photo-contest.
CONGRATS TO THESE COSTUMED CUTIES FOR WINNING FIRST (TOP), SECOND (ABOVE) AND THIRD (LEFT) PLACES IN THE 2021 CONTEST!
6 METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022
OFF THE PAGES
Join us for STEAM family fun on Nov. 5! Geek out at our annual Geekapalooza event, a STEAM Festival for Kids! Hosted by MetroFamily and prizes, giveaways and our popular “Geek” costume contest.
Girl Scouts can earn badges for their participation in Geekapalooza. Thanks to Presenting Sponsor: Boeing, Com- munity Partner: Continental Resourc- es and Supporting Partners: OERB, Clevyr, Google and MidFirst Bank. Learn more and get your tickets at metrofamilymagazine.com/ geekapalooza.
Girl Scouts Western Oklahoma, Geekapalooza encourages kids to learn about science, technology, engineering, art and math through a variety of hands-on activities. Join us Saturday, Nov. 5 from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. at the Girl Scout’s STEAM- focused Camp Trivera in northeast OKC for a day of kid-friendly activities on subjects like robotics, coding and geosciences taught by market leaders and local experts. Plus, enjoy live music, arts presentations, food trucks,
Who? 3- to 12-year-old children Where? The University of Oklahoma Is compensation provided? Yes Who do I contact? Dr. Katerina Ntourou
Scan here for more information
(405) 271-4214 ext 46069 oustutteringlab@ouhsc.edu IRB14017: Attentional bias to threat, social anxiety, and childhood stuttering. / The University of Oklahoma is an equal opportunity institution. www.ou.edu/eoo.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 7
Oh, Baby! The team at MetroFamily got to “meet” more than 100 of the cutest babies in OKC through our 2022 Cutest Baby Photo Contest! Every single one captured our hearts, and it was next to impossible to select 10 winners. Over the next several issues, we’ll be introducing two winners at a time in the magazine. You can find a full list of winners at metrofamilymagazine.com/ cutest-baby-contest. Thanks so much to everyone who submitted photos, and thanks to prize sponsors Green Bambino and lactation consultant Becky Drevets.
Lola 22 months
George 10 months George loves sauerkraut, venison, playing with all his toys and snuggling his dog.
Lola loves Baby Shark, No More Monkeys Jumping on the Bed , eating goldfish, being with mama and playing outside.
Enter your baby in our next contest in January 2023!
8 METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022
CREATIVE KIDS IN THE KITCHEN
Make Maddux’s Tasty Tortilla Spins BY ERIN PAGE Congratulations to Maddux Franklin, the winner of our 2022 Healthy Kids Cooking Contest, sponsored by Shape Your Future Oklahoma! For the contest, entrants had to create and submit a recipe using fruit, vegetables or whole grains. Maddux is an 8-year-old third grader at Fairview Elementary School in Moore. He plays basketball and soccer, enjoys playing board and card games and, of course, loves to cook, with his specialties being cherry bars, guacamole and smoothies. His mom, Missy, has encouraged each of her four kids to cook with her since they were little. Missy’s advice to other parents who want to get their kids involved in cooking: “Try to make it fun. Step back from the busyness and rush to get dinner on the table and enjoy the time together.” Maddux says cooking encourages him to try new foods, problem solve when something doesn’t work the first time and use his creativity. Maddux’s Tortilla Spins are perfect for a quick breakfast or creative after-school snack, with the added benefit of practicing social-emotional skills as kids create a face out of fruit to mirror what they or someone else is feeling. The Franklin family has been practicing identifying and naming emotions with a set of “feelings flashcards” (pictured), which Maddux drew inspiration from for his recipe. Both the cards and the tortilla spins have helped the Franklin kids feel more confident discussing their own emotions and recognizing each others’ feelings, too. Find more kid-friendly recipes at shapeyourfutureok.com/recipe- categories/snacks.
😊
Ingredients • Whole wheat tortillas • Peanut butter (or nut butter of your choice) • Fruit (apples, strawberries, bananas, blueberries and/or raisins) Directions 1. Place a tortilla on a plate. 2. Spread a thin layer of peanut butter on the tortilla. 3. Cut up the fruit(s) of your choice and place on the tortilla. 4. Be creative and add nuts, coconut or other healthy options. 5. For even more fun, create a design with the fruit or make faces like I did! MAKE A TASTY SNACK, PLUS PRACTICE IDENTIFYING EMOTIONS, WITH MADDUX’S TORTILLA SPINS. TASTY TORTILLA SPINS BY MADDUX FRANKLIN
SPONSORED BY
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 9
SPONSORED
Caring for Caregivers THE WORK OF RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE CHARITIES ®
BY DAVID DINSMORE . PHOTOS PROVIDED.
SPONSORED BY RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE CHARITIES®
THE BLYTHE FAMILY CHECKED IN TO THE NEWLY-EXPANDED RONALD MCDONALD HOUSE® IN OKLAHOMA CITY WHEN THEIR DAUGHTER, LILLIA, WAS IN THE HOSPITAL.
HOME AWAY FROM HOME The Blythes – both senior airmen in the U.S. Air Force – came to OU Children’s Hospital from Altus in December 2021 after complications led to the premature birth of their daughter, Lillia. With their extended families in Georgia and South Carolina and their home two hours away, the Blythes checked in to the local Ronald McDonald House® to be near Lillia as she underwent a variety of procedures and treatments for her underdeveloped respiratory system. The newly expanded 40-bedroom Ronald McDonald House in Oklahoma City – whose first house opened in 1984 at another location offering 10 bedrooms – attaches directly to OU Children’s Hospital via a skybridge. This proximity allowed the Blythes to arrive at the NICU in the middle of one particularly crucial night five minutes after a nurse called to alert them of Lillia’s distress. “It’s been so great being so close to her and not having to worry about being two hours away,” said Kaleigh. “It takes the stress [out] of having to travel back and forth.”
Caring for caregivers: that’s been the mission of Ronald McDonald House Charities® for nearly 50 years as it has provided accom- modations free of charge where families can stay together while caring for their critically ill or injured children. “Families are stronger together,” said Susan Adams, president and CEO of Ronald McDonald House Charities® of Oklahoma City. “We are a place for families to be together.” Since its first house in Philadelphia in 1974, the organization has established more than 375 locations near top children’s hospitals around the world, welcoming parents who travel considerable distances to receive the best care, including Kaleigh and Najiyen Blythe.
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Ronald McDonald Houses balance the need for families’ privacy and support, according to Adams. While families receive their own personal bedroom and bathroom, they can also access common living, dining, kitchen and laundry areas where they can meet with other families caring for their own sick children. After Najiyen began returning to duty in Altus during the week, he was grateful Kaleigh not only had a safe place to stay near Lillia but also other parents in the house around her, so she was not alone between the NICU and their accommodations. “We’ve been fortunate to have this as part of our experience and to give me peace of mind when I’m at work,” said Najiyen. “She’s able to go to lunch or talk with people that understand what’s going on, so she has that connection.” SERVING LOCAL FAMILIES The amenities offered at houses go beyond a place to rest and recharge, said Adams. The local Ronald McDonald House also enlists the help of guest chefs to provide at least one meal a day for families and they furnish some staples for families to prepare other meals in the kitchen facilities. Some volunteers also offer their services in providing haircuts and other personal care needs for those staying at the house, and musicians and artists have offered their talents at events hosted at the house for guests. Ronald McDonald House Charities also cares for those who live in the same general area as the hospital through the Ronald McDonald Family Room®, which offers services like showers, laundry, computer access and snacks without families having to make the round-trip journey home.
WRAPAROUND SUPPORT While all involved in this work hope for the best outcomes, Adams said the realities guest families face can come with loss and grief. But sometimes the families’ experiences in a Ronald McDonald House can help provide an added layer of support during their darkest time. “We help families that are not able to take their child home perhaps even more than the families that are able,” said Adams. “We do not provide clinical care, but our team walks by their side with each day no matter what it brings. They gain support from our team. They gain support from other families in the house. As I hear from families … we have given them the ability to be by their child’s side to continue to make memories until the day they are not able to take their child home.” Given the number of families the organization serves every year and its association with 90 percent of the world’s top children’s hospitals, Ronald McDonald House Charities has utilized family-centered care research that analyzes how critical hospitalizations of children impact families long after they return home. Stability from accommodations like Ronald McDonald Houses can help reduce some of the negative outcomes from those experiences. HOW TO HELP PROVIDE HOPE Ronald McDonald House Charities funds its services with help from individual and organizational donors who support its mission to keep families together. For instance, local McDonald’s restaurants provide a penny in donations for every pound of fries sold, and some feature boxes near the registers for patrons to make cash donations.
You have everything you need so you can focus on taking care of your child. Susan Adams, president & CEO of Ronald McDonald House Charities® of Oklahoma City
Dave and Stacy Lopez have not only donated personally to the organization for years, but they also have helped plan and coordinate events like Walk for Kids and the annual Red Shoe Rendezvous – which will take place at 6 p.m. on Sept. 23, 2022, at the Omni Hotel, 100 Oklahoma City Blvd. – because of the impact they have seen in the lives of guest families they have met. “To see all the work done through the charity and to see the space it provides for families to help give them hope, that to me is the most rewarding part of being involved,” said Dave Lopez, who has attended events at the local, national and international levels. “It’s a great place for hope.” Despite its global reach, the organization
“You have everything you need so you can focus on taking care of your child,” said Adams. Keeping families together became a greater challenge during the period of distancing and separation stemming from responses to the COVID-19 pandemic, which included not allowing siblings to stay with their families until recently. Ronald McDonald House Charities of Oklahoma City adapted to the changing guidelines to ensure they continued helping families. Despite suspending admission of new families into the local house on March 21, 2020, the organization continued providing accommodations to the families already staying there, said Adams. They
understands the importance of its role in local communities. As such, Adams said all money raised locally stays within the local Ronald McDonald House Charities programs. Donations can also take the form of toys provided for siblings to play with while staying at the house or food items for the pantries provided for families’ use, said Adams. For more information and ways to get involved with Ronald McDonald House Charities of Oklahoma City, visit rmhc-okc.org or call 405-424-6873.
supplemented their facilities with hotel rooms for new families for a time, and they still provided meals every day for parents with the help of hospital vouchers, packaged meals and community partnerships. As protocols started to ease, Ronald McDonald House began welcoming parents back, and the house and family room returned to normal operations in mid-April 2022. During this time, the local Ronald McDonald House completed its planned expansion to 40 bedrooms, and Adams said she is looking forward to using this new space to help even more families by providing a projected 8,067 accommodated nights in 2022 and about 12,400 nights in 2023.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 11
What ancient cultures can tell us about raising children BY THE METROFAMILY EDITORIAL TEAM Primitive Parenting Tips
DR. MICHAELEEN DOUCLEFF’S BOOK HUNT, GATHER, PARENT EXPLORES HOW IMPLEMENTING PARENTING STRATEGIES FROM ANCIENT CULTURES CAN BENEFIT FAMILIES.
How did you initially get interested in how other cultures parented their children, and what did you observe that resonated with you? My husband and I were really struggling with our 2-year-old daughter, Rosy. It just always seemed like there were tantrums, big feelings and conflict between us that regardless of what parenting trick we tried, the situation didn’t improve. At that time, NPR sent me down to this little tiny village in the Yucatan, a little Mayan village, to do a different story, but the parents there completely changed everything I thought I knew about parenting. My way of parenting was like this white knuckle ride on category five rapids — drama, screaming, tears galore. And the Mayan parents, especially the moms I was visiting with, they were on this calm, gentle river through a beautiful mountain valley. There was no yelling, no nagging, no bickering. And no resistance from the children. And yet the parenting was really effective. Kids were respectful of their parents. They were generous with each other. And they were super helpful. I left there with an incredible amount of hope. Like I can’t even get my 2-year-old not to hit me, but I observed a Mayan mom who has five kids and she has them doing chores without even being told. It was the first inkling in my mind that maybe I’m not a bad parent, maybe my culture hasn’t taught me how to be a good parent. As I started studying and traveling more, I realized that the approach in the Yucatan isn’t unique at all. It’s actually really common around the world. And if you look throughout human history, even in parts of Western culture today, this is the way parents have traditionally interacted with and raised children. We’ve kind of gone off path the last hundred years or so and forgotten this way of interacting with children.
What if you were able to easily incorporate parenting techniques that resulted in happy, cooperative, empathetic children — without yelling, nagging, bribing and rewarding? If you’re parenting kids of any age, this may sound impossible! However, maybe we need a new perspective and different tools for our parenting toolkit that have actually been honed and practiced successfully for thousands of years. That’s the basic premise behind the New York Times best- selling book Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans by NPR journalist Dr. Michaeleen Doucleff. The ideas and practices in her book are easy to implement and are designed to create much calmer households. We interviewed Doucleff to get to the heart of why ancient parenting practices can often work more effectively than our Western, modern ways of parenting.
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I know there are so many more tips in your book but do you have one more idea you think is key that really helped you and Rosy? We’ve kind of come to think that children need special activities — especially evenings and weekends. What that has done has separated the child world from the adult world. This has had huge effects on children. One morning, one evening, one weekend, don’t plan anything for the child; just go about your life, making breakfast, doing chores, running errands, and have the child be with you. And then give the child one or two very simple things to do with you. ‘Hey, come stir this pancake batter.’ Or, ‘Come turn on the water hose.’ Include them in your life; it will strengthen your relationship with them. It’ll teach them to cooperate with you and how to be in the adult world. If they misbehave, you can say, ‘Look, you’re in the world right now. This is a privilege. You need to be quieter.’ Including her in my regular life has made a massive difference in our relationship. Editor’s note: Dr. Michaeleen Doucleff is currently a correspondent for NPR’s Science Desk. In 2015, she was part of the team that earned a George Foster Peabody award for its coverage of the Ebola outbreak in West Africa. Prior to joining NPR, Doucleff was an editor at the journal Cell , where she wrote about the science behind pop culture. She lives with her husband and daughter in Alpine, Texas. This is a condensed and edited version of a MetroFamily interview with Doucleff. To hear the full interview, become a Modern Art of Parenting member for $19/month or $199/year with a 30-day money back guarantee. Enjoy access to 20 presentations by parenting experts like Doucleff, plus additional perks. Learn more at modernartofparenting.com.
What was amazing — and the reason why I really wrote this book and ended up traveling with Rosy when she was 3 back to the Yucatan, up to the Arctic and over into Tanzania — was every time I tried something that I learned or observed about using this approach, it worked really well. When you start using this approach, it’s like magic. The kids just kind of jump on board and start interacting with you in a way that’s less resistant with less conflict, and all of that anger, all those tantrums, start to melt away. What techniques have you incorporated from these cultures that work best with your daughter? In the book, I go over about 25 different things that parents around the world are doing. But I really want to concentrate on two major things. One is how parents interact and communicate with their children in ways that minimize conflict and maximize cooperation. And the other thing that surprised me was how much autonomy other cultures give their children. In communicating with kids, there are a couple things to pay special attention to. For one, parents in these other cultures don’t argue with kids. I’ve stopped arguing with Rosy, and it has made all the difference. When an argument begins, I place my hand on Rosy’s shoulder gently and say, ‘I’m not going to argue with you.’ And then I walk away. Another important technique I learned was how to tell stories rather than use logic when trying to get your young child to do something. Sometimes these stories seemed rather scary, and that worried me at first, but then I realized the point isn’t to frighten the child but rather communicate what is important and serious. All the stories are told with a wink of the eye, and you can tailor it so the story doesn’t scare the child but rather teaches them. Plus, kids love to be a little frightened. Just think about how much Disney movies use scary stories. For little kids, these stories turn a stressful or conflictual moment into a fun one. For instance, when Rosy would keep the refrigerator door open, I used to try logic and talk about how she was wasting energy and the food was going to spoil. Obviously, that wasn’t understandable to her, but when I said there was a monster in there and if he warmed up, he’d get really big and come and get her, she immediately slammed the door and asked me to tell her more about this monster. It is an amazing tool and we use it for all sorts of conflict situations, like coming up with stories about bedtime and putting on shoes to go outside. Rosy loves all these stories and asks for more. When talking about autonomy, I realized that in comparison to the parents I was observing in the Yucatan, Tanzania and the Arctic, I was talking nonstop with Rosy. In fact, I recorded myself and it turns out I was giving verbal commands or cues at the rate of about 100 per hour! This might have been praise statements or ‘do this/ don’t do this’ words. On average, a Tanzanian parent might give three an hour compared to my 100. Words are stimulating and often they just stir up conflict with kids. I’ve learned that it’s good to be more silent with Rosy, to let her step back and watch. Then she can learn by doing, but I’m there if she needs help. Our lives are so much more calm because of it.
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 13
FAMILY MENTAL WELLNESS
How to Talk with Kids About Substance Use BY PAM MCKEOWN , OKLAHOMA DEPARTMENT OF MENTAL HEALTH & SUBSTANCE ABUSE SERVICES
Surprisingly, a third of Oklahoma students, including nearly 37 percent of sixth graders, said they got alcohol from home with their parents’ permission . It’s worth noting: giving alcohol to minors is illegal and providing a location for underage drinking violates Oklahoma’s social host law. Underage alcohol use can lead to impaired brain development and alcohol dependency in adulthood. Youth who begin drinking before age 15 are six times more likely to develop alcohol dependence or abuse later in life than those who begin drinking at or after age 21, according to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). For decades in Oklahoma, alcohol has been among the top three drugs of abuse for adults seeking addiction treatment services, reports the Oklahoma Department of Mental Health and Substance Abuse Services (ODMHSAS). The other top drugs of abuse are marijuana and methamphetamine. In addition to impairing brain development at a critical time, for Oklahoma kids who are experimenting with alcohol and marijuana, the substances can contribute to the onset of certain mental health disorders. Prevention, of course, is always the best medicine. ODMHSAS actively works with Oklahoma communities, school systems, Regional Prevention Networks, healthcare entities, state agencies, businesses and civic organizations to prevent or reduce youth substance abuse. But parents — and teachers — are the ones on the front lines, and conversations with kids from the trusted adults in their lives about the dangers of substance use are critical in imparting knowledge and preventing abuse. When parents and teachers work together as a team to discuss learning difficulties, peer problems, academic achievements and friendships, the effect is even more powerful in identifying and preventing issues that can lead to abuse. To get started talking with kids about the realities of substance use, use these tips from The Partnership to End Addiction: Preschool (2-4 years old) • It’s never too early to start talking about substance abuse. The foundation for healthy habits is created during the preschool years. • When giving your preschooler a vitamin, explain, “You need to take vitamins every day so you can grow up big and strong, but you should only take what I, or a doctor, give you.” • Explain the importance of eating healthy foods, exercising and getting a good night’s sleep. Discuss how good you feel when you take care of yourself — how these habits help you run, jump and play. Early Elementary (5-8 years old) • Talk to your kids about substance-related messages they see on TV or in movies or overhear at school. Ask your kids how they feel about these substances — you’ll learn a great deal about what they’re thinking.
Most 9-year-old kids like to play outside, make slime and try new games. But 9 is also the average age kids begin to think about alcohol. It’s at this age that kids’ impression of alcohol starts to shift from negative to positive, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics, making it a critical time to begin conversations about substance use. While drugs like fentanyl grab headlines for their deadly potency, the reality is the three drugs most likely to be abused by kids in Oklahoma have remained consistent for many years. Alcohol is first on the list, followed by marijuana and tobacco . According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, 80 percent of teens say their parents are their biggest influence on their decision to drink. While it’s not always easy, talking with your kids about substance use could prevent them from facing serious consequences and, possibly, even save their lives. Substance prevalence among Oklahoma kids These mind-altering chemicals have been around for centuries, are widely used and are easily available to youth. On a broader scale, alcohol and marijuana are far more deadly than other drugs because of their contribution to youth car crashes, accidents and other unintentional deaths. The 2019-2020 Oklahoma Prevention Needs Assessment showed that of those responding to the survey, 60 percent of seniors, 47.4 percent of 10th graders, 33.3 percent of eighth graders and 20 percent of sixth graders had used alcohol.
Oklahoma kids who have …
USED ALCOHOL • 60% of high school seniors • 47.4% of high school sophomores • 33.3% of eighth graders • 20% of sixth graders TRIED MARIJUANA • 39.3% of high school seniors • 27.2% of high school sophomores • 13.4% of eighth graders • 4% of sixth graders
SMOKED A CIGARETTE AT LEAST ONCE • 28% of high school seniors • 20% of high school sophomores • 13.7% of eighth graders • 7% of sixth graders 2019-2020 Oklahoma Prevention Needs Assessment
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• Vaping has become more common among kids this age (more than one in four Oklahoma teens report vaping), but that doesn’t mean it’s safe. Instead of reducing stress and anxiety, self-medicating through vaping worsens mental health and has long-term effects on brain development. • Listen instead of lecturing and use open-ended questions to get the conversation started. Make it clear that you disapprove of all alcohol, vaping, nicotine and drug use. • Show interest in and discuss your child’s daily ups and downs. You’ll earn their trust and learn how to talk to each other. • Encourage healthy risk-taking. Teenagers take risks to find out who they are. By guiding your teen toward healthy challenges, you can help them satisfy a desire for excitement, avoid negative • Keep communication open with your child as they leave home. They need to know they can turn to you for help should problems arise. • Stay alert to possible mental health issues. A strong link exists between mental and physical health issues (including stress and anxiety) and substance use. If your child is in college, make sure you both know what campus mental health resources are available. Find more resources for talking with your child about substance use at metrofamilymagazine.com/how-to-talk-with-kids-about- substance-use and access additional crucial parenting resources at familyfieldguide.org . consequences and bolster their confidence. Young Adults (19-25 years old)
• Keep your discussions about substances focused on the present — long-term consequences are too distant to have meaning to most children of this age. • Discuss the differences between the medicinal uses and illegal uses of drugs and how taking prescription medicine the wrong way can be dangerous. • Get to know your child’s friends and their parents. Preteen (9-12 years old) • Preteens give their friends’ opinions a great deal of power and are starting to question their parents’ views and rules, all of which is normal. • Remind them you don’t allow any substance use because it’s detrimental to their health and their brains. Let them know you will enforce the rules. • Tell them if they’re ever offered pills or other substances, they can always use you as an excuse to get out of a bad situation. Encourage them to say, “My parents would ground me forever if I did that” or “My parents can always tell if I’m lying.” • This is the age it’s especially crucial to make yourself available to talk and listen. Teenagers (13-18 years old) • Teens are incredibly knowledgeable about addictive substances and need information based on reality.
ARCADIA LAKE STORYBOOK FOREST
October 23–30 (Closed on Halloween) 5:30–8:30p (Times may change) | $5 Per Adult | $12 Per Child Starting October 1st all tickets will be for sale ONLINE ONLY at STORYBOOKFORESTOK.COM Volunteers & Additional Info please call 216–7471 Sponsored by Arcadia Lake and Edmond Electric
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LOCAL FAMILY FUN
EXPANSION OF SCISSORTAIL PARK Brings More Fun to Downtown OKC Families can now enjoy pickup games and nature play in the newly-opened lower park
THE NEW LOWER SECTION OF SCISSORTAIL PARK IS CONNECTED TO THE ORIGINAL 36 ACRES VIA THE SKYDANCE BRIDGE. PHOTO BY STEVE JOHNSON.
Since its opening in 2019, Scissortail Park has become a prime destination for families and visitors in Oklahoma City. This urban oasis, centrally located within walking distance to the Myriad Botanical Gardens, Paycom Center, Omni Hotel and OKC Convention Center, offers a space for both fun and relaxation for all ages. BY APRIL DEOCARIZA
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3 Locations to Serve You! Edmond • OKC • Yukon
THE LOWER PARK ADDITION NEARLY DOUBLES THE SIZE OF SCISSORTAIL PARK TO 70 ACRES. PHOTO COURTESY OF MAPS 3 OFFICE.
The park’s original 36 acres includes ornamental gardens and woodlands, a small lake, children’s playground with unique structures, splash pad, seasonal roller rink, dog park, picnic grove, restaurant, performance stage and great lawn, all connected by meandering paths that encourage visitors to enjoy the tranquil setting. “I love all the different path configurations; even if you think you’ve seen the whole park, there’s always a new way to go, especially when I’m running or with the kids,” says Jeanne King, a local mother of three. “We can always find a quiet corner no matter how crowded the rest of the park is. For such a big, open park, there are so many peaceful little spots.” Over the past three years, the Scissortail Park Foundation has received extensive positive feedback from families on the plethora of activities the park provides. It’s no wonder the park was named a 2022 MetroFamily Family Favorites winner in several categories, including Free/ Low-Cost Attraction, Park, Place to Take Out-of-Town Visitors and Place for a Family Picnic, as well as a finalist for Outdoor Fun/ Amusement Venue and Splash Pads! “Families love the playground, especially the water features during summer,” said
Maureen Heffernan, CEO of Scissortail Park Foundation and Myriad Gardens Foundation. “They love our roller rink that we have in the pavilion and being able to rent boats. People have also made the weekly farmer’s market part of their Saturday routine. There is something for everyone.” Families can meet for a play date, host a birthday party or simply pack a picnic and enjoy views of the downtown skyline from the great lawn. The park has also brought people together from all corners of the city, and beyond, for community events hosted by local groups or the park itself, including the Night Markets promoting local artisans, OKC PrideFest and Festival de Vida y Muerte, or Day of the Dead Celebration. MetroFamily hosted over 2,000 people for its Kids Fest in June at the park. Park guests have also enjoyed concerts, including LeAnn Rimes in May 2022, art workshops and health and wellness activities, such as walking clubs and Zumba. In addition to the food trucks that frequent the park, other dining options have also recently opened, like SPARK, featuring burgers and shakes, and The Perch lakeside café. In addition to serving as a hub of fun for local families, Scissortail Park also serves as a respite and introduction to Oklahoma City for visitors.
Play • Learn • Thrive
Call (405) 840-1686 to schedule an evaluation!
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 17
Julia Redfield, a mom of three from Nebraska, visited Scissortail Park during a spring break road trip to Louisiana. “We loved the feel of the city around us, the imaginative playgrounds that captured the kids’ attention and the wide open spaces,” said Redfield. “It was great to be somewhere our whole family could enjoy!” DOUBLE the Fun Now families will get to enjoy even more fun when the new southernmost section of Scissortail Park opens to the public on Sept. 23. The lower half of the park will be connected to the north end via the Skydance Bridge, and this addition will nearly double the size of Scissortail Park to 70 acres. Construction on the 30-acre lower park began in November 2020, and the total project budget for Scissortail Park is $132 million. The completion of Scissortail Park with the addition of the lower section was among the projects funded by MAPS 3, a $777 million capital improvement program to enhance the quality of life in Oklahoma City. The new section of the park features two basketball courts, a soccer field, futsal court and four pickleball courts, as well as a sports pavilion and small performance area. Families will also enjoy the new nature playground. “It’s a place where kids can use their imaginations and engage with stumps and logs or boulders as well as other climbing features,” described Heffernan. A lit promenade and series of walking trails will extend south to the Oklahoma River Trails, where families can continue walks or bike rides along the Oklahoma River. The area will also feature a wide variety of horticultural plantings representing the prairies of the region with native grasses and wildflowers as well as hundreds of new trees. At the very end of the lower park, a large hill will beckon visitors to soak in 360-degree views of the city. “Now you have this beautiful connection from the Myriad Botanical Gardens (located just north of Scissortail Park) right down to the river trails that you can walk or bike to,” added Heffernan. Local teacher and mother of four Sarah Trousset says Scissortail Park is reminiscent of the parks her family visited in Europe, where they lived for four and a half years. “We love that it’s family friendly and open, encouraging an active lifestyle,” said Trousset. “There is easy access to parking. I love that it is expanding, offering us more beauty for walking and running.”
A LIT PROMENADE AND SERIES OF WALKING TRAILS NOW EXTENDS SOUTH TO THE OKLAHOMA RIVER TRAILS FROM SCISSORTAIL PARK. THE LOWER SECTION OF THE PARK FEATURES TWO BASKETBALL COURTS, A SOCCER FIELD, FUTSAL COURT AND FOUR PICKLEBALL COURTS. ALL PHOTOS COURTESY OF MAPS 3 OFFICE.
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Make plans to attend the GRAND OPENING Scissortail Park Foundation, along with the City of Oklahoma City, MAPS and their partners, will host a ticketed first-look gala celebrating the opening of the new lower section on Sept. 15. A weekend-long celebration, dubbed “Scissortail Park Takes Flight,” will take place Sept. 23 through 25, and weekend events will be free and open to the public. Activities will include guided tours, musical performances, health and wellness activities and a concert, among other special programming. Many of the activities will be offered in both English and Spanish. Families can also try out the new sports courts and a special expo will be hosted by professional athletes. The full schedule of events is available at scissortailpark. org and on social media @scissortailpark. “This has been a tremendous investment in downtown OKC,” said Heffernan. “How did we ever live without Scissortail Park?!”
A NEW SPORTS PAVILION, SMALL PERFORMANCE AREA AND HUNDREDS OF NEW TREES GRACE THE LOWER SECTION OF SCISSORTAIL PARK. PHOTO COURTESY OF MAPS 3 OFFICE.
Enter your kids (ages 2-12) by Sept. 30 and receive a set of discounts to local attractions valued at over $150! Could your child be our next cover kid? metrofamilymagazine.com /coverkidssearch
THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS
METROFAMILYMAGAZINE.COM / SEPT-OCT 2022 19
REAL DADS OF THE METRO
D’Andre Foster The Homeroom Teacher BY LANCE EVANS . PHOTOS BY BILLY GREEN. “It was fine!” It’s the dreaded response every parent hates to hear in the school pickup line. This quick, blunt response can almost always illicit feelings of failure as a parent when trying to engage with your child about their school day. We often expect to be so much more than parents. In these moments we hope to be therapists offering cathartic advice to our kids. We want to be heroes. We want to hear about the school bullies and convince our inner saviors not to confront them on the playground. We want to be a resource, but that all stops with that definitive, conversation-ending “fine.”
IN ADDITION TO BEING A HUSBAND AND DAD, D’ANDRE FOSTER IS A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND COMMUNITY ADVOCATE.
Thirty-six-year-old D’Andre Foster was sick of hearing the response “fine.” A few months ago, he challenged himself to show up more for his kids. “I challenged myself to be more present in the moment,” said D’Andre. For D’Andre, being present means taking well-intentioned efforts to actively engage with Gabrielle, his 9-year-old daughter, and Demias, his 3-year-old son. With his wife’s help, D’Andre developed a list of ice-breaker questions to get Gabrielle talking about her school day. What started as a clever way to gain insight into the hilarious confessions of an elementary school student actually helped D’Andre further his relationship with his daughter. This isn’t surprising because it’s reflective of who D’Andre is: a titan in Northeast Oklahoma City whose community starts at home. Freshman year D’Andre grew up in Northeast Oklahoma City in the prestigious Wildewood addition. His love for his community runs deep. “I credit my parents for that,” said D’Andre. “I connected to and credited my mom’s experience. She was orphaned at the age of 14. The Eastside has always felt like home. The Eastside has always felt like love for us.” The love D’Andre holds for his parents is palpable and has clearly ignited action in his own household dynamic. He gleefully acknowledges his father as one of his greatest inspirations. “One of the things that I take from my father is soft skills in parenting,” said D’Andre. “He was hard on us, but he was nurturing.” After attending Classen School of Advanced Studies for middle school, D’Andre followed in his parents’ footsteps and attended Frederick Douglass High School in Northeast OKC. He says that decision was his own. “A lot of people would assume that my parents made me go to Douglass,” said D’Andre. “It was my desire and my dream. I wanted to go to Douglass and now my daughter wants to go.”
D’ANDRE FOSTER CREDITS HIS PARENTS FOR HIS LOVE OF COMMUNITY AND FOCUS ON INTENTIONAL PARENTING.
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Early registration D’Andre attended Southwestern College in Kansas and graduated with a bachelor’s degree in business administration. During his sophomore year at Southwestern, his eye caught a glimpse of Krystle – soon-to-be Mrs. Foster. Their romance started off bumpy with a first date story for the books. “I had a ‘93 Buick Century and she had a newer Toyota Camry, but we decided to drive my car,” said D’Andre. “We go to the movies and McDonald’s after. We get back in the car and my car won’t go in reverse. She hopped out in her stiletto heels and started pushing the car. I knew that I had to take her seriously and do everything I could to hold on to her.” After five years of dating, D’Andre and Krystle tied the knot in 2009. They’ve been piecing together their happy-ever-after since. The Fosters welcomed daughter, Gabrielle, in 2013 and son, Demias, in 2019. Graduate course A few weeks before his conversation with MetroFamily, D’Andre talked with his wife about the parenting goals he hopes to achieve. For D’Andre, this means a concentrated effort to put his cell phone down and enjoy all of life’s small, fleeting moments. He doesn’t want to miss a thing.
“I wanted to be less focused on responding to messages and emails, including social media,” said D’Andre. “My daughter is 9 now, and she’s at an age where she is going through some changes and transitions. I want to be present to hear what needs to be heard and connect when I need to connect. I try to be intentional about communication.” D’Andre has come full circle with a return to Douglass High School as an AP history teacher and coordinator for the Academy of Law and Public Safety. This fall will be his fifth year teaching at his alma mater. He says he’s back for the long haul. “My first-day teaching, a student said ‘How long are you gon’ be here?’” recalled D’Andre. “I am here until they fire me!” At Douglass, D’Andre teaches beyond the classroom by advocating for his students and offering a listening ear for problems they are experiencing in and out of class. “If I’m not teaching at Douglass, I don’t really feel like I will be called to teach,” said D’Andre. “Them knowing that I am rooted in the Eastside goes a long way for my students.” Editor’s note: This article is the fourth in a year-long series celebrating local dads. Author Lance Evans and husband Chris are fathers of Chrystian and were voted MetroFamily’s 2021 Cool Pops.
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FALL FUN GUIDE
Fall
GUIDE Fun
The air is getting crisp, the leaves are starting to change color ... and is that pumpkin spice we smell?!? Autumn adventures: we are ready for you! From pumpkin patches and farm fun to trick-or-treat events and fall festivals, plan your family’s perfect season with our advertisers in this guide. Check out all our fall guides online at metrofamilymagazine.com/fall.
Ongoing Events
FOTO ARTS PHOTOGRAPHY
Oklahoma State Fair Sept. 15-25
3001 General Pershing Blvd, OKC 405-948-6797, okstatefair.com
OKC Parks and Recreation Fall Film Series Sept. 9-Oct. 14 OKC Parks facebook.com/ OKCParks Families are invited to bring blankets and/or lawn chairs and enjoy family-friendly movies
Since 1907, the Oklahoma State Fair has been a fall tradition of amusement and entertainment with concerts, shows, exciting rides, tasty food, lively competitions and more. Save money on admission by purchasing
advanced tickets or visit on a discount day, like Thrifty Thursday when admission is $5.
and pre-movie activities at OKC parks across the metro. The series includes six movie nights and will feature: Sonic the Hedgehog, Encanto, The Nightmare Before Christmas, School of Rock, Spider- man: No Way Home and The Princess and the Frog . Find park locations and event updates at facebook.com/OKCParks.
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