m w r Theological Seminary Thorough Preparation for
the Christian home several children re cently came to my office quite indignant because her husband fre quently quoted to her Solomon’s def inition of a perfect wife and mother (Proverbs 31:10-31). The pompous piety with which he used (or mis used) this passage, and the times and occasions on which he chose to com pare her with it, left him feeling very righteous and “ Bible centered” , while the wife was forced to experience frus tration, fury and resentment toward the Bible. This produced more guilt and other complications, all by the neurotic manipulation of religion. After an hour’s interview, it was obvious that what the mother wanted was an answer, an interpretation or an argument with which to defend herselL against this passage in Prov erbs. At that moment, she did not want any part of a long-range coun seling program. There are possible ways of avoiding the intended therapy contained in the passage. Perhaps we could suggest that this applies to Israel! Or maybe Solomon had in mind a sort of com posite woman, created in his imagina tion from all the good points of his one thousand wives! The modern mother could hardly be expected to compete with that composite paragon of perfection. Especially not if “ she” was only the product of an arrogant man’s fantasy! However, the book of Proverbs is God’s Word. Therefore, we conclude that this passage has realistic value to the modem mother. It provides a gentle rebuke to the disorganized, selfish and lazy mother. There are such persons today. It also provides a goal for the diligent mother who is mature enough not to feel failure if she falls short of this ideal, but who will press on. It also provides a re minder to the Christian mother that only in the strength of the Lord can she hope to achieve this goal, so drives her to quiet and strengthening times of meditation and communion. It also serves to hold out to her a defini tion of the rewards which she can ex pect from the Lord and from an understanding family. She is not pic tured here as a servant to be pitied or patronized, but a partner to be praised and honored. Here are but a few of her rewards. “ The heart of her husband doth safe ly trust in her.” To be trustworthy is to be like Christ Himself, which is the A m o t h e r o f
by Paul Bayles, Pastor, Christ Community Church Canoga Park, Calif.
highest honor. “ She is not afraid of the snow for her household . . .” because by the diligence of her own hands she has planned and provided for her family’s needs. A sense of security and personal achievement can be rightly hers. “Her husband is known in the gates.” Behind every successful man is a woman who can secretly share in her husband’s honor. “Her children call her blessed.” Quite likely they won’t do this until they mature themselves, but some day, when encouragement is needed the most, they will. “Her husband prais- eth her.” Any man with a wife like this is a fool if he doesn’t show his appreciation. Sometimes a word of praise can help a wife become a wo man like this. “ She shall rejoice in time to come.” Her rewards are not always immediate, but though long- range, they’re real. No doubt what wives and mothers need to hear most is not mere praise and flattery, but the sounds of con tentment in the home. A mother wants to be assured that she is mak ing her family happy. To give this assurance and to make these sounds is the responsibility of children and the husband. Reproaching a partner with Scripture is not only misusing God’s Word, but is self-incriminating evidence that the quoter is not living up to his part of the very Scripture he quotes, for he is offering criticism, not praise. The sword of the Spirit is not to be wielded and waved for pur poses of gratifying one’s exaggerated need to feel spiritual, superior and righteous. We need to accept the Scriptures and apply them personally to our own weaknesses. Life does ask a great deal from mothers. Few mothers feel adequate for their assignments. Few women feel that they are living up to the image of perfect wifehood created for them by a sentimental and artificial society. Perhaps a key to greater satis faction and peace for the woman in her role is an acceptance of God’s patterns and promises. God is not only gracious, tolerant and under standing, but He can give power to those who trust Him. The woman who obeys God’s call to motherhood is fulfilling the will of God. There can be more enjoyment of motherhood if there is more enjoyment of God. Do not try to find all your contentment in your vocation. Leam to enjoy the God who gave you your assignments and abilities.
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