3 STAGES OF EMPTY NEST SYNDROME Are You Emotionally Prepared for Your Kids to Leave? 10 People to Thank
Now you may be wondering … what is a springing power of attorney? The Case of the Springing Power of Attorney A springing power of attorney is a special type of power of attorney that only allows your agent to act in the event that you are incapacitated and that fact is confirmed by either one or two licensed physicians. So, in other words, you are appointing someone to be your agent and make financial decisions on your behalf, but only if and when you are incapacitated.
Being a parent and following the intense schedule that comes with raising children became your lifestyle, one you have adhered to for over a decade. Eventually, your children grow up, move out, and have their own kids. Getting accustomed to this immense change can be difficult and cause you to feel sadness and grief at what feels like the loss of your identity.
It sounds like a great idea … right?
Well, let me share a story of a client named Tony. Years ago, my team and I completed Tony’s estate plan and he had a springing power of attorney in it. Tony gave his niece, Bekka, the authority to be his financial power of attorney under a springing power of attorney. All seemed well. Then a few months ago, Tony had a stroke and was hospitalized. And he was incapacitated. So, about a month later Bekka takes the financial power of attorney to the bank and tries to move some money from his savings into his checking account to pay Tony’s bills. But the bank rejects it. They require Bekka to produce a letter from two physicians stating that Tony is incapacitated. Bekka contacts the case worker in the hospital and has them prepare the letters. And she takes the letters to the bank. The bank rejects them again because they don’t have the specific language that was spelled out in the power of attorney. Bekka, now frustrated, contacts my office to see if we can provide some assistance. Ultimately, we were able to provide her with the assistance that she needed to get access to her uncle’s bank accounts. And it’s a good thing that he didn’t pass away during the process. Because every second counts in situations like this. And that’s why a springing power of attorney doesn’t make the most sense. If Bekka was appointed under a non- springing power of attorney, then she
This is called “empty nest syndrome,” and you’ll be happy to know you won’t feel this way forever. You’ll likely experience three distinct phases, and we’re here to help you go through them! Stage 1: Despair Your children leaving home is a huge life change, and even the tiniest things can trigger a bout of crying. When you pass their old bedroom or find one of their belongings left behind, the tears might flow, and that’s okay! It’s only natural to feel lonely and feel as if you’ve suddenly lost your purpose. While you may want to withdraw from the world and wallow, now is the time to reconnect with friends and loved ones to remind you there’s more happiness in your life to be experienced. Stage 2: Relief After a few months, the despair will dissipate, and you’ll feel a sense of relief. You’ll begin to enjoy not worrying about the various tasks and responsibilities once expected of you. No more preparing lunches, doing their laundry, or cleaning up after them! With all this free time now available, you can dive into past or new hobbies and discover your interests. Stage 3: Contentment Finally, you will feel happy. After experiencing the first two erratic stages of empty nest syndrome, you’ll settle into your new lifestyle. Regular yoga classes, summertime cruises, or book clubs are now the new norm. You can finally sit back, relax, and know you’ve successfully raised your children to become independent adults.
would’ve been able to go to the bank with the power of attorney document only. She wouldn’t have needed the letters from the physicians and everything would have worked out smoothly. If you have a springing power of attorney, call us at 740-346-2899 so that we can update it today.
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