As each week passes, I become happier and happier and my life feels real. I am no longer dissociated. I am in the driving seat. I no longer care as much about what people think, I no longer take things others say or do personally. I just get on with me. Feedback from one of the coaching clients left me in awe, she described me as shrewd. I had to look this up. I was shocked and something sank in. What I was doing was worthwhile. All the years I had struggled to describe myself and worried about how people saw me and this was a complete and utter compliment. Making it all worthwhile. I no longer get paranoid, I never feel depressed and I can move as I’ve never moved before. I find myself dancing, having fun, and messing about, often just randomly. It would be a lie to say that doing a house up isn’t stressful, it really is. The perfectionist in me leaks out, I have so far pissed off the joiner; the painter, and the cable guy all because I held them accountable. All because as a woman in my own right I have the cheek to speak up and hold people to their word and their commitments. I have been blamed for a few things and allowed my husband to play the role of an innocent nice man with a dragon wife who wants a perfect home, but I do not give a shit. I no longer see my role to explain or feel bad for speaking out or dimming out my light to meet others' egos. I no longer feel the need to pussy foot and worry about what I bring to the table. Not having a hangover or wine head means there no anxiety and no badness. There is very little space for self-doubt and I love it. I am taking shrewd all day long. Last week I deadlifted 110kg and my aim is to continue to be thankful, stronger, and better than ever, exercising my body and my mind. I am, it would appear, living my best life. Thriving, not merely surviving. Lots of Love, Emma ❤️
HOLA SOBER | MADRID
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