FOOD FOR THOUGHT: BY ROSLYN ROZBRUCH (AS I SEE IT)
Focus on the solution.
During the 18 months of Erica and me planning her wedding, even though it was a lot of fun, there was also a tornado of other problems swirling around. It’s not that important to mention all the turbulent activity that happened during that time, but I will share one problem. Right around March, my older daughter, Danielle, decided to sublet her apartment for a few months because she had a work opportunity in Joshua Tree. For those of you unfamiliar with Joshua Tree, it’s located 130 miles east of Los Angeles, just outside of Palm Springs. Translation: the middle of nowhere in the desert, or, as one travel brochure says, “one million acres of desert landscape, with a population of 7,414.” Danielle has been to Joshua Tree many times and has friends there. Going to stay for a few months wasn’t the problem; subletting her guest house to an acquaintance was. Without going into all of the boring details, let’s just say the person who sublet my daughter’s home reminded me of the main character from the movie “Gone Girl,” and if you don’t know that movie, then let’s just say she was something out of your worst nightmare. Unfortunately, it turned into a worst-case scenario: She completely moved into Danielle’s place within one week’s time, and to make room for her things, she put some of Danielle’s things outside and some of her other things in the trash. I sensed the subletter was not going to move out. Needless to say, it was stressful for not only my daughter but for Michael and me as well. Things went from bad to the most awful real quick. As I tried to stay in the eye of the storm and not get sucked into the tornado of life, I listened to a podcast from Dean Graziosi. Michael and I have been fortunate to have been in one of Dean’s mastermind groups for a couple of years, and we’ve learned so much from him and have great respect for him. On this particular podcast, Dean shared how he went fishing with his fiancée, Lisa, and son and daughter when somehow, his son accidentally got a fishhook stuck in Dean’s hand. Apparently, once that hook got in, it didn’t come out so easily. Dean tried a few things, but the hook wasn’t coming out. He shared that instead of getting upset and yelling at anyone or blaming his son, he decided to “focus on a solution.” What could he do to get the hook out of his hand? He knew pulling at it wasn’t going to get it out, and while I don’t
remember exactly how he got it out, the point is that he did figure it out. What stuck with me was the simple phrase, “focus on the solution.” It’s so easy to get upset and blame others or hold onto to the things that bother us. But if grudges were rocks, it would be a heavy load to carry if you never let them go. After listening to Dean’s podcast, I decided to do as he said. I went to Michael and shared this information, and we decided to hire an attorney to help Danielle. Lucky for us, one of our friends, Mike Zeff, is an attorney, and he’s also an expert in knowing how to evict tenants who take advantage of their rental situation. A little more than two months after the nightmare began, the subletter moved out. And after a thorough cleaning, painting, and some repairing, Danielle happily moved back into her home.
We all have tornadoes in our lives at times. You can let yours sweep you away, or you can stay focused, figure out a solution, and get out of the storm. –Roslyn Rozbruch
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