FINDING BALANCE IN TOUGH CO-PARENTING SITUATIONS
In the middle of a bitter custody battle, the party who ends up the most hurt is usually not the parents — it’s the child. We talk about it a lot and for good reason. In a custody battle, many people tend to forget that it is important that the child not suffer. It doesn’t matter if the two parents dislike one another or are unable to communicate. It’s important that both parents make a serious effort to not place the child or children in the middle. Kids should never be used as a bargaining tool, and parents should never put their kids against the other parent.
for the child to have a relationship with both parents. Suggest fun activities for your child and the other parent to do together.
• Always keep the other parent informed of any and all appointments and extracurricular activities your child has planned. An online calendar you both have access to can alleviate some of the stress. • Never belittle or argue with the other parent in front of the child. Kids hear everything, and it isn’t fair to anyone to give your child a negative image of their other parent.
Here are a few tips we have found to be helpful for our clients who are in difficult co-parenting situations:
• Allow and encourage phone calls or video chats between the child and the other parent.
• Encourage a healthy relationship between your child and the other parent. This can be beneficial to you in the long run. It’s important
• Try to plan important events, such as birthdays and graduations, so that the other parent is able to attend.
Co-parenting is never easy. It takes effort from both parents — sometimes a lot of it. Don’t forget you and the other parent have at least one thing in common: the love you share for your child. Build a relationship around that fact and make your child’s health and stability a priority to ensure your child grows up happy and balanced.
HOPPIN’ JOHN
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Inspired by Saveur Magazine
We might need us some 20/20 vision! Remember this?
in January, to force ourselves to turn off the cellphone and the noise and think through where we are and where we seem to be going. Then, if those two don’t match , make some practical changes. Get help, if necessary, rinse, and repeat. Or the end of 2020 will look a lot like last month. Let’s not go there — and let’s not go there on purpose. We wish the absolute best for you in 2020. A guy by the name of Bob Proctor said, “If you can hold it in your head, you can hold it in your hand.” Let us choose 20/20 vision in 2020! (I just made that up.)
Inspired by Epicurious
Alice: “Would you tell me, please, whichway I ought togo fromhere?” The Cheshire Cat: “That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.” Alice: “I don’t much care where.” The Cheshire Cat: “Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”
1. Wash and sort peas. 2. In a saucepan, cover peas with water, discarding any that float. 3. Add pepper, ham hock, and onion. Gently boil and cook uncovered, stirring occasionally, until peas are just tender, about 90 minutes. At this point, you should have about 2 cups of liquid remaining. 4. Add rice, cover, drop heat to low, and simmer for 20 minutes, undisturbed. 5. Remove from heat and let steam for an additional 10 minutes, still covered. 6. Remove lid, fluff with a fork, and serve. • 1 cup dried black-eyed peas • 5–6 cups water • 1 dried hot pepper, optional (arbol and Calabrian are great options) • 1 smoked ham hock • 1 medium onion, diced • 1 cup long-grain white rice INGREDIENTS DIRECTIONS A traditional New Year’s favorite in the South, Hoppin’ John includes black-eyed peas that are said to represent coins, a sign of prosperity for the coming year. It’s usually served alongside collard greens, which represent cash.
–“Alice in Wonderland” by Lewis Carroll
Hmmm. So, I am an attorney; I am expected to advise. Here’s my easy advice for starting a new year, and actually, a fresh decade. We need to slow it down for a time, preferably sometime
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