hand? Let us consider how many movies have been made that are 50 per cent cold-blooded, mindless violence, compared with the number of movies where the protagonists are homosexual. And, before you say it, yes, Brokeback Mountain won three Oscars and the world was a better place for it. So, when is it appropriate to use the word ‘gay’? The answer is, to describe a person who is openly homosexual or a when describing something normally associated with homosexuality. Ellen Degeneres, Gareth Thomas, Jim Parsons, Clare Balding, Gay Pride or a gay bar are all things that are justifiably eligible to be described as ‘gay’. ‘Gay’ should not be used to describe something that you would view to be annoying or bad or negative, such as a piece of homework you didn’t want to do, or a comment that someone has made. In these cases, a suitable alternative should be employed, like ‘silly’ or (my personal favourite) ‘asinine’. The crux of what I am trying to say is that most of the time, ‘gay’ is not meant in a derogatory way and generally does not come from hate or bigotry, but mainly from laziness. ‘Gay’ is a really easy word to throw out, but it is not applicable most of the time and not the message you are really trying to convey. Nonetheless, it still has its consequences. For a person coming to terms with their sexuality, whether they are gay, bisexual, transgender or
merely questioning, for them to live in a society where ‘gay’ is used as a term to describe something inferior or negative, sends out the message that they are not welcome in this community if they come out as gay and this can cause young gay people to feel isolated in their community. It is very easy for me to say ‘Homophobia is bad. Do something about it!’ I recognise that this isn’t easy, particularly in a boys school, where banter is such an integral part of how we communicate with our friends. I wanted to talk in an assembly because I myself didn’t know what to say when I heard people use this kind of language. Depending on the situation, a good thing to do is to give a gentle reminder that that kind of language is not acceptable. A simple ‘that’s homophobic, don’t you think’ or even a roll of the eyes is enough to convey the right message. It’s about doing what you can – no more, but certainly no less. Remember that silence is consent and individual condemnation of homophobic language is another step in the right direction. Cultural change is a matter of baby steps: I do not expect never to hear the word ‘gay’ being used incorrectly again, but what I hope is that when I do hear that kind of language, it is quickly followed by a gentle reminder that that isn’t okay.
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