Steer Clear of Trouble
Beyond Stranger Danger
Teaching Kids to Stay Safe
One of the most winning qualities of little kids is their curiosity about the world and the people around them. A recent video of a winsome toddler starting conversations with adult shoppers at the grocery store drew more than 20 million views on TikTok. But if that curiosity leads a child to engage with strangers in public, is that still a good thing? The dire parental warnings against “stranger danger” of the 1980s and 1990s seem a little extreme today. Teaching kids to fear anyone they haven’t met isn’t healthy. Children need to develop social skills to talk with a doctor or a new teacher, order a meal, make new friends, or ask for help. Recently, parenting experts have begun promoting a more nuanced view of stranger danger. They encourage parents to teach children to recognize suspicious behavior and identify adults they can trust. “Rather than issuing a blanket warning about stranger danger, allow children to talk with other adults in safe situations in public and observe them provide real-life examples of what they need to know,” Reena Patel, a parenting expert, told Parents magazine. Patel urges parents to teach their children ground rules: Adults don’t ask children for help, so don’t respond to an adult stranger who does so, and trustworthy adults will not invite a child to leave a safe place to show them something or give them a gift. If your child is uncomfortable talking with a stranger, don’t require them to do so just for the sake of politeness. Patel says, “Some children are simply a little slower to open up to others, and they shouldn’t be labeled ‘shy’ just because of that temperamental trait. Support them in cutting off any conversation that makes them uncomfortable.”
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