Hola Sober April 2024

Hola Sober Morning Reflection

by Susan Christina

Dear Sober Queens,

as you dress up whatever brittleness you have inside that is hankering for a glass of tragedy self-destruction sitting watching the sunset.

There are two ways to address a problem in your life :

(1) Tell yourself a better story about the problem so it hurts less. (2) Actually address the problem. Most of us spend all of our time doing the first one. -Tom Bilyeu - Badass is what I would call all women on this journey at Hola Sober. Half-ass is what I sometimes see as an approach from women who are intellectualising whether alcohol- free is REALLY for them. They cling somehow to the hope that they were not that bad or that they could do a few more dances with Moderation Marcus. I have heard every phrase on the planet from "I was never that bad," or “I never drank in the morning."

Badass is required. Not half-ass.

"Ethanol is a volatile, flammable, colourless liquid with a slight chemical odour. It is used as an antiseptic, a solvent, in medical wipes and antibacterial formulas because it kills organisms by denaturing their proteins. Ethanol is an important industrial ingredient. Ethanol is a good general-purpose solvent and is found in paints, tinctures, markers, and personal care products such as perfumes and deodorants. The largest single use of ethanol is as an engine fuel and fuel additive. In other words, we drink, for fun, the same thing we use to make rocket fuel, house paint, anti-septics, solvents, perfumes, and deodorants and to denature, i.e. to take away the natural properties of, or kill, living organisms. This might make sense on some level if we weren't a generation of green-minded, organic, health-conscious, truth-seeking individuals. But we are. We read labels, we shun gluten, dairy, processed foods, and refined sugars. We buy organic, we use natural sunscreen and beauty products. We worry about fluoride in our water, smog in our air, and hydrogenated oils in our food, and we debate whether plastic bottles are safe to drink from. We replace toxic cleaning products with Mrs. Myers and homemade vinegar concoctions. We do yoga, we run, we Soul Cycle and Fitbit, we go paleo and keto, we juice, and we cleanse. We do coffee enemas and steam our yonis, and drink clay and charcoal, and shoot up vitamins, and sit in infrared foil boxes, and hire naturopaths, and shamans, and functional doctors, and we take nootropics and we stress about our telomeres. These are all real words.

Guess what?

I was never that bad either. I never drank in the morning EVER. I rarely drank at lunchtime during the working week. I opened wine at midday at the weekends. I was the quintessential, look at me drinking in plain sight not having a problem while I slowly strangled myself inside eroding each and every piece of me. It pains me to see half-ass and this mask of 'hopefulness' that this time it will be different. Ladies, blind determination and single mindedness is what is required in a war for your own health and well-being not hope. Badass storm footing is what is required until such time as you feel you are of out the darkened valley of death dressed up in a wine bottle addiction in the loving hold of your support sober sisters. Heading into our weekend, I want you to read the following words from the wonderful Holly and read them twice if needs be for them to sink in low, sink in hard


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