House, one of his characters, a retired army man, Mr. Bagnet, loved his wife deeply, but he never allowed her to suspect it, for he declared, “ dis cipline must be maintained.” Are wives and husbands holding out on each other, lest they spoil their mates? Or is it that they will be con sidered sentimental? Recently I heard a pastor tell about a man who never in all his married life told his wife he loved her until she was dying! According to the Scriptures, marriage is for this life. All the time we have to make marriage “ a little Heaven to go to Heaven in” is now. What will be our feeling there if we fail each other here? Read any marriage service. What is the first commandment of mar riage? The first vow spoken is al ways in answer to the question, “Wilt thou love him (her)?” So the primary duty of any husband or wife is to love with all the heart. Anything less than this is the beginning of the end of wedded bliss. It is the only thing that will endure through the vicissi tudes and the prosperities of life. Paul besought husbands not to be “ bitter” against their wives. Bitter ness may develop where love once existed, and its wounds in the heart can be healed only by understanding affection. Elizabeth Barrett Browning, in one of her sonnets to her husband, ex pressed her feeling in regard to the marriage tie in these searching words: “ Nevermore Alone upon the threshold of my door Of individual life, I shall command The uses of my soul, nor lift my hand Serenely in the sunshine as before, Without the sense of that which I forbore,— Thy touch upon thé palm. The wid est land Doom takes to part us, leaves thy heart in mine With pulses that beat double. What I do And what I dream include thee, as the wine Must taste of its own grapes. And, when I sue God for myself, He hears that name of thine, And sees within my eyes the tears of two.” Whatever married people feel about each other, or do to each other, they do to themselves, for they are for ever bound up with each other in the bundle of life. As it is unthink able that my hand should hate my foot, or my eye despise my ear, so it is incredible that married Christians should ever think or act as if they had no need of each other. They are
“ one flesh” whether they conduct themselves accordingly or not. They cannot sever the tie that God has se cured. I have not gone into the matter of what the influence of genuine love between husband and wife does to children in a household. Of all things that make for security, it is my opin ion that this is the most important. Children are very perceptive. You cannot fool them. What a solid foun dation is laid for their lives when real affection between mother and father is obvious! The minor disagree ments which afflict most homes will not affect this consciousness of solidar ity. Happy homes of parents insure happy homes for children. This is love’s chain reaction from generation to generation. If love is waning in a Christian home, what cure can be effected? Psychiatrists are working on this all the time, filling libraries with learned volumes on the subject. Men are told to ply their wives with gifts; women are told to build up the egos of their husbands. This advice is all good as far as it goes but it does not reach the heart of the matter. This condition between a Christian man and woman calls for a revival of first love. As in religious awakenings, when Christians begin to recall the mercy and goodness of God, which leads to repentance, so “ lovers call again to their mind old gentlenesses and old service and many kind deeds that were forgotten by negligence,” wrote Mallory, “ for like as winter’s rasure doth always erase and deface green summer, so fareth it by un stable love in men and women. For in many persons there is no stability . . . for a little blast of winter’s rasure anon we shall deface and lay aside true love (for little or nothing) that cost so much . . . Let every man of worship flourish in his heart in this world: first unto God, and next unto the joy of them that he promised his faith unto; for there was never wor shipful man nor worshipful woman but they loved one another better Y o u r Praye r Requests Each morning at eight the editor ial staff of King's Business magazine gathers for prayer. Over the years God has answered the heartcry of thousands. Should you have a re quest we would count it a privilege to take it to the throne of grace. Your request will be held in the strictest confidence. Address: The Editors, King's Business, 558 So. Hope St., Los Angeles 17, Calif.
than themselves.” I read of a man and woman who were « ha v i ng difficulty. He had wronged her, and though he was re pentant, she would not forgive. A friend undertook to make peace be tween them, pleading with the wife to be reconciled to her husband. His arguments had no effect until finally he burst forth: “A ll right, all right! why not try imagination? Can’t you picture him ill or dying . . . would you forgive him then?” At this the wife broke down and was soon weep ing in her husband’s arms. No matter what the means, love must be fanned once more into a strong and steady flame to produce happiness between a man and wom an. What first attracted them to each other is still there to be rediscovered by the eyes of love. Whatever the age, couples may be sweethearts again, and second honeymoons will be brought about. Hearts should be touched by the wonder that anyone else in this world would love them supremely. Years ago I came upon this poign ant passage in a story: “ ‘Mother,’ he said one evening, ‘What is this marriage?’ “ She laid down the book she was reading, and looked into the fire, and it was a long time before she an swered. “ ‘If a man and woman love each other, it is the sweetest thing in the world. There is nothing sweeter, not flowers, nor big trees even, nor the singing of the birds. The heart of each of them is in the bosom of the other, and all their joy is doubled, and their sorrows made nothing of, unless it be the loss of a little one; then they know they will see it again; and tenderness springs up between them, like water in a sweet, cool well. “ ‘And nothing can bother them, not loss of wealth, when they have each other, nor persecution, when they have love between them. And the imperfections of each are welcome even, because they are something to be understanding of, gentle toward. “ ‘And, when one dies, the other dies a little too; and . . . just a few springs, a few winters, a little revolv ing of the stars, and they shall both know the cool, untroubled eternity of God.’ ” When husband and wife stand at the judgment seat of Christ, they will be happier, if they have loved and appreciated each other here, and helped each other to love God and to walk with Him. Meantime why not enjoy each other, and life together on this earth to the uttermost? Next to salvation, it is the most blessed experience of the human heart. END.
JUNE, 1955
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