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Peace of Mind Post
MAY 2022
EVERY STORY IS WORTH SHARING
THE VALUE OF CONNECTING GENERATIONS
As we approach Older Americans Month this May, I want to offer some advice: Spend time with people outside of your generation. You just might be surprised at what you learn and how willing other people are to learn from you. Allow me to explain. By now, many of you know how special my grandmother was to me. Throughout our countless hours spent together, she became my best friend, and I have a trove of memories from my time with her. It’s no secret that she inspired the work I do today at Trinity Elder Law. As I grew up, I was told so many stories by my grandmother and about my other grandparents, highlighting their resiliency and growth. That’s one of the biggest lessons I have learned from “the greatest generation.” Everything they dealt with, from the Great Depression to world wars, was met with a kind of endurance I don’t think we have witnessed ever since. Another lesson I’ve learned is to approach every day or small annoyances with a simple question: Is this going to matter in 20 years? Often, I find that, no, it’s not. So, I stop wasting my time worrying about it! It’s the big things that matter the most. As you age, you start to learn that, and that wisdom is invaluable to those you can share it with. This May, I challenge you to connect with someone who isn’t your age. If you’re younger, spend time with an older adult. Pick away at the treasure of knowledge that they have stored in their minds. I think many people have a bad habit of looking down or dismissing older adults as feeble or “unable,” and that’s a great loss. They are a valuable asset! What I wouldn’t give to have another conversation with my grandma or to talk with the grandmother who died when I was too young. That kind of connection is priceless. Likewise, if you’re older, I challenge you to reach out to your grandchildren, a young neighbor, or the young worker at your favorite store. You may be surprised to learn that there are many people in generations younger than yours who do want to know what you have to say and are eager to listen. In many cases with family members,
they will often cherish those conversations more than any heirloom you could give them. I think you’ll be surprised.
One piece of advice as you venture out to do this is to not be afraid of different or new modes of communication. Younger generations may prefer to FaceTime or video call rather than chat on the phone, so don’t resist this. If you are unsure of how to set up a video call, ask a neighbor, child, or friend to help you. Bridging that gap can be important to taking that first step toward connection. I also understand that some people may not have many living family members or neighbors to chat with, but that doesn’t make your story any less valuable. I’d encourage you to write down your wisdom and stories or record it for others. You may even try submitting your story to NPR’s StoryCorps, which is committed to telling the stories of everyday Americans. Storyworth is another great resource. They collect your answers to weekly questions, and at the end of a year, you are given a book detailing stories from your life. Generations after you will love the gift!
Every older adult has a story worth sharing, and every younger person could benefit from listening. Let’s connect this May.
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Estate Planning for Your
When it comes to estate planning, most people think of organizing their finances to ensure their assets are in order for their surviving loved ones. But estate planning also includes your pets. You view your pets like family, so why not plan for them and their needs? Here are the three steps you need to take when estate planning for your four-legged family members. No. 1: Decide Who Will Care For Your Pet You first want to decide who will take care of your pet. This individual will be responsible for providing your furry companion with daily care throughout their lifetime. Like
HAVE YOU ADAPTED TO YOUR NEW ROLE? BEING A BETTER GRANDPARENT There are few roles as coveted as being a grandparent, but today’s grandparents do far more than slip $10 bills and hard candies to their grandchildren. While there are still opportunities for growth, new studies have found that grandparents are taking on active roles and loving it. Here are two prominent lessons on grandparenting in 2022. Positive Progress: Supporting Grandchildren The make-up of American families today isn’t cut and dry. An AARP survey found that one-third of grandparents are a different race than their grandchildren and most would support their LGBTQ+ grandchildren. While many grandparents find sharing pieces of their heritage is important with grandchildren, a 2021 Good Housekeeping article noted that many grandparents who share different ethnicities with their grandchildren welcome new cultures. In fact, many weave their traditions together. When it comes to navigating these waters, Good Housekeeping recommends talking about an approach with parents first. Some may choose to keep or remove certain traditions. Furthermore, grandparents are viewing their roles with grandchildren as active rather than passive. A 2021 Good Housekeeping survey of parents and grandparents discovered that nearly 70% said they were “cooler” than their own grandparents and that they want to babysit, versus feeling obligated. Needs Work: Supporting Parents The 2019 AARP study shares that most grandparents surveyed believe they parent better than their grandchildren’s parents, but it may be best if that thought isn’t vocalized. In contrast to this, the Good Housekeeping survey explained that grandparents “sharing outdated advice” was among the biggest frustrations for parents. Instead, experts at Stanford Children’s Health recommend taking “grandparenting classes,” which provide new grandparents with the latest medical direction that parents are provided. And, if you feel obligated to share advice, ask first and make sure the parent knows it’s only your perspective. In all other scenarios, it’s best to keep your opinion to yourself and foster a grandparenting relationship that supports your grandchildren’s parents.
planning for children, before you discuss finances, you must decide who you’re confident and comfortable with to be your pet’s caregiver.
An option may be selecting someone who already has pets
of their own. But you need to look at how they treat their pets and if they will be able to maintain your animal’s standard of living. No two pet
Puzzle Time!
Answers:
Want to be a better grandparent? Sign up for a local grandparenting class; these are typically offered through medical or community centers.
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YOUR TEETH MAY HOLD AN AGING SECRET If your eyes are the windows to your soul, then your mouth is the window to the rest of your body — really! Poor oral health can impact your heart, blood sugar, nutrition, and other areas. As such, an important component to aging is keeping your mouth in mind. Let’s start with oral health habits. By now, you know it’s vitally important that you brush twice each day and floss daily to fight cavities and gum disease, but as you age, there are certain habits or situations that can impact this. For instance, many seniors are on medications that may reduce salivation or saliva production. This can create an uncomfortably dry mouth, but it also fosters an environment that’s perfect for bacteria to grow. Saliva acts as nature’s toothbrush, wiping away plaque and regularly rinsing your teeth. So, when you don’t produce it, bacteria can linger longer and have greater opportunities to eat away at your teeth. That’s why your breath stinks when your mouth is dry! Improve Your Oral Health as You Age
r Pets
3 STEPS YOU SHOULD CONSIDER
owners are the same, so you must find someone who will make your pet as comfortable as possible. No. 2: Figure Out Finances Depending on where your pet will live, their health, and any extra expenses, you need to consider how much money you will leave to cover all of those costs. If your pet is relocating, you’ll need compensation for the caregiver. Emergencies can happen at any time as well, so it’s best to leave enough money as a cushion if any situation arises. No. 3: Create a Pet Trust When developing a trust, you want to select a trustee who will be responsible for ensuring your wishes are granted. Your trustee will also be responsible for distributing your money, as you’ve stated in your trust. It’s recommended that your trustee and pet caregiver are not the same person because it can create a conflict of interest. An important note to mention is that y ou cannot leave money or property for your pet if you create a will. You can, however, use your will or living trust to leave money to care for your pet that a caretaker will use for the pet’s lifetime. Have any questions about pet planning? Trinity Elder Law & Estate Planning has a Four-Legged Family Member plan that we can help you with! Call us at 724.256.8850, and we will be happy to assist you.
To combat a chronically dry mouth, try the following tips:
• Chew sugar-free gum. Chewing can stimulate saliva production, and opting for sugar-free gum helps you avoid tooth-decaying sugar. Plus, most sugar-free gum contains Xylitol, a compound that has great benefits for your teeth! • Rinse with water after eating. Limit the effects of a dry mouth by swishing with water after you eat. This can release and remove some of the caked-on bacteria in your mouth. If that’s too gross for you, munch on a couple carrots instead. Carrots are hard but gentle enough to lightly brush your teeth and stimulate saliva production. Poor oral health in older adults can also be a sign of a larger issue. This is a symptom of Alzheimer’s, diabetes, and osteoporosis — each for varying reasons. For instance, those with Alzheimer’s tend to ignore personal hygiene and care routines as the disease progresses, while those with diabetes are at greater risk for gum infections because the disease lowers the gums’ defenses. If you notice unusual poor oral health on your older loved one, talk to them about seeking professional guidance. Trinity Elder Law’s Julie Anderson recommends ‘My Dentist,’ Dr. Karen Shulman. Julie says Dr. Shulman is fantastic, and she serves a wide variety of patients and their needs. You can learn more by calling Dr. Shulman’s office at 724.444.8100.
ONE-PAN BAKED SALMON AND VEGGIES
Ingredients
• • •
1 lb spring potatoes, halved 2 tbsp olive oil (divided) 8 asparagus spears, trimmed and halved
• • • •
2 handfuls cherry tomatoes 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
2 5-oz salmon fillets 1 handful fresh basil
Directions
1. Preheat the oven to 400 F. 2. In an oven-proof dish, combine the potatoes and 1 tbsp olive oil. Roast for 20 minutes. 3. Remove the dish from the oven and add the asparagus. Toss, and bake for 15 more minutes. 4. Remove the dish from the oven and add the cherry tomatoes. Toss. Drizzle with balsamic, then nestle the salmon fillets into the vegetables. Drizzle with the remaining oil, and bake for 10–15 minutes. 5. Remove the dish from the oven, garnish with basil leaves, and serve!
Inspired by BBCGoodFood.com
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340 N. Main St., Suite 103 Butler, PA 16001 724.256.8850 www.TrinityElderLaw.com
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INSIDE This Issue
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Share Your Story This May
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Grandparenthood Has Changed — Have You!? No 2 Pet Owners Are the Same
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One-Pan Baked Salmon and Veggies The Aging Secret Found in Your Mouth
Cat Saves 83-Year-Old From Potentially Fatal Tumble
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While the search crew worked, Piran refused to move from one specific spot, and he meowed incessantly. That wasn’t like him, so eventually, Tamar Longmuir, a neighbor assisting in the search, decided to find out the reason for all the racket. Longmuir called to the woman while investigating the cat’s noises and heard a faint response. Piran had staked out his position where his owner had fallen — 70 feet down a ravine located at the edge of a cornfield. According to Longmuir, “She had gone through the barbed wire and was laying in the stream — we think she had been in there for hours.” Emergency services were called and quickly rescued the woman. “Without the cat waiting at the gate to that field,” Longmuir added, “it could have been hours later that I or anyone else would have checked in there.” The injured woman was taken to the hospital in good spirits and stable condition, avoiding a potential tragedy. Meanwhile, the police posted a photograph of Piran’s handsome black face on social media and declared him a hero. Though he reportedly received many treats, Piran’s real reward was a job well done. “The cat is very attached to her,” Longmuir said. Cats may not generally be known for their loyalty, but maybe it’s time for the stereotype to get an update. Clearly, Piran the black cat was anything but bad luck. He proved it with the grandest act possible — saving his human’s life.
BY DIALING 911 Black Magic HOW ONE CAT SAVED HIS OWNER’S LIFE
Black cats can have it rough. People associate them with Halloween and bad luck, they can be tricky to photograph, and they make up a full third of all cats surrendered to animal shelters. But one special black feline named Piran proved his worth when he led rescuers to his 83-year-old owner after she fell down a ravine. In August 2021, the woman went for a walk near her home in Cornwall, England. When she didn’t return, her neighbors started to worry. They formed a search operation, but there was a lot of ground to cover in their rural surroundings. They had little luck in their investigation until they heeded the advice of her cat.
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