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COMFORT ZONES ARE OVERRATED THE BOLD MOVE THAT CHANGED EVERYTHING
Are you ready to take the first step toward freedom and happiness after divorce? At Bruce Law Firm, we offer informational webinars to help guide you through these challenging times. Sign up for our upcoming webinars at BruceLawEvents.com .
No one ever gets to the top or gets good at anything without taking a chance.
Taking a chance or risk in life is never easy, but it’s often an essential part of the journey to growth, success, and genuine happiness. Just look at Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, and countless others who rose to the top by stepping out of their comfort zones to take on something new. (We might never have had Apple if Jobs hadn’t dared to drop out of college, and it changed the world as we know it.) The majority of our greatest achievements as humans were all the result of someone pushing back against the fear of failure and daring to take a first step into the unknown. April 23 is National Take a Chance Day, a reminder and challenge to make a bold move, pioneer, and step outside our comfort zone. Whether it’s a society-changing first like the Wright Brothers literally jumping off a ledge to kickstart aviation, starting a new business, or simply trying something new, these moments of risk often lead to the greatest rewards. We can speak from experience because some of our proudest achievements would have never materialized if we hadn’t leaped. When we first started Bruce Law Firm, we took a big chance. It’s scary to start something new, and we had many moments of second-guessing ourselves. What if I fail? What if it doesn’t work? We have a new baby coming this month. What will my spouse think? Will I continue to get client calls? Will my clients want to stay with me now that I am on my own? These were just some of the thoughts running through Christopher’s head at the time.
familiar to not take a chance. When you start something new, there are many unknown things to consider. For us, it went from gaining and keeping clients, recordkeeping programs, trust accounting, a billing program, a building lease, a payment program, legal research software, discovery and document assembly programs, document storage, support software — the list goes on.
It would have been comfortable and straightforward to stay where he was. But Christopher took that chance and opened up his law firm — and that
BLF has grown from 1 to many.
chance turned into the right decision. The firm opened with only one employee the week our daughter was born. At first, Christopher did all his legal and back- office work. Over time, we have added to the firm’s success by working with a lineup of truly talented professionals. Now, we are as strong as ever and enjoy helping clients out of difficult situations so they can live their best lives possible. The world’s history and personal stories are shaped by taking chances, and we can’t grow until we take that leap. If it weren’t for the early settlers in this country, leaving everything they knew behind for uncharted territory, where would we be today? When we face the unknown, it can define the course of our lives. We know the risk Christopher took in opening Bruce Law Firm was life-changing. So, why don’t you take that chance? Like us, that leap may be one of your best decisions. –Ashley and Christopher Bruce
It’s “easy” to work within an established law firm because all you usually have to do is just plug yourself into doing the legal work. It is “easy” and
December 2016 in the New Office
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ROME’S AWESOME AQUATIC BATTLES
THE COLOSSEUM’S WILDEST SPECTACLE
LOST YOURSELF IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP? Healing From Codependency Starts Now Imagine feeling like you’re constantly walking on eggshells, always trying to fix or manage your partner’s feelings, even at the expense of your well-being. If this sounds familiar, you may be experiencing the effects of codependency in your relationship. Codependency can erode your self-worth over time, leaving you feeling lost, overwhelmed, and exhausted. Healing is within your reach, and you can find yourself again. By recognizing the signs of codependency and learning to break free, you can restore your sense of self and improve your relationship. You don’t have to navigate this alone, and you deserve all the care you so readily give to others. KNOW THE SIGNS OF CODEPENDENCY Do you stay silent when you are struggling with your mental health or to shield yourself from an argument? A codependent person shapes a lot of their identity through being a caregiver responsible for serving their partner’s needs or taking care of their problems. If you are codependent, you may take on an unfair share of responsibilities, stop doing things you enjoy, or fail to stand up for yourself and your boundaries. Because your identity relies on your partner, you might lose satisfaction in life, enable bad behavior, take on the blame to avoid another fight, or exhaust yourself by taking on too many responsibilities by yourself. REDISCOVER YOURSELF It’s easy to lose ourselves when our main focus is to please our partner and maintain peace. One of the first steps to healing from codependency is rediscovering yourself and prioritizing what makes you happy. Keep a journal, work with a therapist, or block out time in your schedule to explore things you enjoy, like art or hiking. What will it take to take care of you? SET NEW BOUNDARIES Boundaries are important in our relationships. They are a line we draw on behavior we won’t accept in our lives. Often, when we are in the throes of codependency, it’s hard to act when our boundaries are not respected. As you heal and gain deeper self-confidence, identify your values and dreams. Set and keep boundaries that matter to you.
The Roman Colosseum is famous for its gladiator combat, but did you know it could be flooded with water for full-scale naval battles called naumachiae ? These aquatic battles were a feat of ancient engineering and showcased Rome’s obsession with over-the-top entertainment. Thousands of spectators cheered as warships clashed in a flooded arena, with soldiers, prisoners, and even seals and hippos playing roles in the reenactments. Of course, flooding the Colosseum was not easy. It’s believed aqueducts supplied the water, and special flat-bottomed ships were used to navigate the shallow depths. However, the logistical challenges proved too much, leading the Romans to abandon the naumachiae after only a handful of events. These extravagant battles weren’t just for entertainment — they were a display of imperial power. While short-lived, the story of the naumachiae remains a testament to Roman ingenuity and their flair for creating spectacles that still captivate us today.
Looking for more guidance on codependency in relationships? Check out our podcast episode, where we interviewed a local therapist here!
Is your friend or client married to a controlling, manipulative, narcissistic husband?
OUR BOOKS CAN HELP!
The book can be downloaded for FREE at DivorceInformationBooks.com
You deserve the same love and selflessness you try to provide to your partner. It’s time to break free of these patterns and start putting yourself first.
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WHEN WORDS WOUND
THE PHRASES NARCISSISTS USE TO MANIPULATE
“Relax, it’s not a big deal.” “I’m sorry you feel that way.” “That never happened.”
hurtful than you’re taking it. Try to stay calm, focused, and secure within your boundaries. If they are trying to get a rise out of you, don’t give them any fuel for the fire.
SHIFTING THE BLAME Narcissists will rarely take responsibility or accountability for their actions or their plight. It’s common for them to turn the conversation into a blame game with you. They may play the victim card or guilt trip, making you feel like the bad guy. They may flat-out gaslight you, denying something they did or said even when there is proof. You can tell them that you won’t stand for them blaming you or even state you will take a 15-minute break from the conversation. DEFLECTING AWAY When you try to bring up an issue or resolve a problem, they may deflect back to you to avoid facing the conversation. It could mean they bring up unrelated details, give non-answers, guilt trip you, or accuse you of doing the wrong thing, often the exact behavior they are engaging in. Again, try to remain calm, set boundaries, and keep yourself safe.
These words may seem harmless at first, but when they are used against you by a narcissist, they become weapons designed to dismiss your feelings, distort reality, and make you question your sanity. Over time, this manipulation can leave you feeling unheard, powerless, and desperate for validation. Narcissists have a talent for twisting your words to control you, making you walk away from conversations, and doubting your memory and feelings. By recognizing the ways they use language, you can reclaim your voice. MINIMIZING YOUR EMOTIONS If you are dealing with a narcissist, you’ve probably encountered situations where you tried to express your feelings, stress, or anger only to have it downplayed. That’s because they lack self-awareness and empathy for others, making them spin it against you. They may try to explain it away as you overreacting or that their behavior was far less
You don’t have to let a narcissist’s words define you. You can regain your power by recognizing their tactics and staying strong in the face of their words.
Inspired by AllRecipes.com
HEARTY GNOCCHI SOUP
Savory bacon and cheddar make this an easy favorite to whip up on cold nights.
Ingredients •
1 tbsp vegetable oil
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1/2 cup half-and-half
Attorneys on break at the conference
•
1 medium onion, diced
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8 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled, divided
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1/2 tsp celery seed
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1 cup shredded cheddar cheese, divided
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4 cups vegetable or chicken broth
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2 tbsp chopped chives
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16 oz fresh gnocchi
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Salt and pepper, to taste
Directions 1. Heat oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add onion and celery seed and cook until onion is soft and translucent, about 4 minutes. 2. Add broth to the pot and bring to a boil. Add gnocchi and cook for about 3 minutes, then stir in half-and-half and 1/2 of the bacon. 3. Remove from heat and add 3/4 cup cheese, then rest until thickened, about 5 minutes. 4. Top with remaining cheese, chives, and bacon as desired.
All lawyers attended a 2-day course in Orlando
Attorneys on break at the conference
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Why Taking Chances Leads to Big Wins page 1
Naval Combat Inside the Roman Colosseum?
It’s Time to Put Yourself First page 2
Gaslighting, Deflection, and Blame
Hearty Gnocchi Soup page 3
Master Your Budget, Achieve Your Dreams page 4
TRIM FINANCIAL FAT LIVING THE DREAM — WITHOUT THE DEBT
Many Americans dream of traveling to exotic destinations, buying a home, or retiring early. Realizing those dreams, however, requires saving some cash — a habit that is becoming a dying art. Only 41% of Americans have emergency savings to cover unexpected medical bills or repairs, and more than 25% have no savings at all, according to a Bankrate survey. Instead, more people are using credit cards to cover expenses and vacations, driving consumer credit card debt to a record $1.17 trillion in 2024, up 8.1% from 2023.
Then, look for places to trim. To reduce utility bills, consider lowering the thermostat or installing low-flow fixtures. Cancel subscriptions you aren’t using. (Nearly half of subscribers pay for streaming services they don’t use.) Consider preparing more meals at home as the cost of dining out has soared! And make paying off credit card debt a top priority; those high-interest charges are a cancer on your budget. If you can’t pay off your balances, try switching to a lower-interest card or ask your provider for better terms. CULTIVATE HEALTHIER HABITS. Strive to set aside 50% of your income for basic needs, 30% for things you want, and 20% for savings. If you can’t save 20%, start with a smaller percentage. Pay yourself first by setting up automatic transfers into your savings. Online shopping with credit cards can be a significant budget drain. Restricting yourself to debit card or cash-only payments can help you reduce impulse purchases. If you yearn for a little retail therapy, dive into a cleaning project, call a friend, or do volunteer work — distract yourself! Even if these steps seem menial at first, your savings over time will bring you closer to realizing your dreams!
Inflation and low pay are partly to blame, but taking charge of your spending can still bring you closer to achieving your dreams. Here are two ways to better your budgeting.
TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR BILLS. A smart first step is to stop spending everything you earn. Start by tracking where all your money is going. List fixed expenses, such as housing, and variable costs, such as utilities and food. Add up subscriptions, transportation, entertainment, and health care spending. You can also track your incidental expenses in popular apps like YNAB, Monarch, Goodbudget, and PocketGuard.
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