Mornings of light On waking, I go all Scandinavian (this is a Norwegian practice I believe) putting my two bare feet firmly on the ground claiming my space on this earth, opening the bedroom window (irrespective of weather), and breathing deeply letting fresh air litter my body taking me into a new day. I tell the universe and my ancestors, I am here, I am showing up today, bring it on. I light one candle within minutes of this breathing and say my sober promise ‘not today lady, not today ’ sending light and intention into the universe. I light the second candle of intention to include all those in my sober world and a special few moments for those in active addiction who do not have the privilege I enjoy. I light a small night-light candle for families in pain from those lost from addiction and ask for special healing and light to be shed around these families asking for them to find a glimmer of hope today. I make a big mug of steaming builders strength tea and begin to write my daily email which soothes my mind before I begin my day and puts my intention upfront and centre in my world. I walk daily (4-6km) listening to music, podcast, or audiobook across a broad breadth of subjects that often include sobriety or all things Ireland. I have a gratitude jar in the kitchen and on my work desk and throw in random gratitude notes each day in varying degrees of profoundness "I want to kiss the person who invented chocolate" to "I had an awful flashback today of a drinking night and I sat with it and survived it." I write a gratitude journal nightly (I have been doing this since reading Saran Ban Breathnach's book ‘Simple Abundance’.
It shouldn't feel like an obligation. It should feel like a celebration,” My life does not feel like one long struggle or filled with drinking challenges, my life is one of complete freedom and joy even on the shittiest of days because I am one of the lucky ones who learned the science, accepted the wisdom of others and took back control of my life. It is not an endless battle of choices. It is not some mental warfare going on in my mind daily. Life is warfare. Families and relationships can be warfare. Working environments can be warfare. The bloody supermarket on a busy Saturday can feel like warfare but not drinking is not warfare once we make it out of the early days. “One of the joys of not drinking is how it has freed up my headspace. I no longer spend hours of my time unwittingly thinking about its purchase, consummation or its regret. For me the easiest thing to do was very early on in our course, accept and reach the decision my wine years were well and truly behind. I was addicted to an addictive substance, as are you, but I have accepted that fact, and you have not. You are still dressing your addiction up in language and thinking that is untrue, pink, and frivolous; shying away from the realities of this addictive substance that daily robs families and robs beautiful women of the spirit of wonder. When I look at the simplicity of my list it seems utterly useless in the face of such a monstrous enemy, but the weird thing is that it works for me, always has and always will, and as Matt Haig says “Hell, if licking wallpaper does it for you, do that, in the absence of universal certainties, we are our own best factory.” Lots of love Susan
I message my core sober tribe (Gee + Colette) each morning
I daily practice the 'S pirit of Wonder' an approach to life I coined in early sobriety where I try and find wonder in all things. From the leaves on the trees to my son saying thank you after dinner, it keeps me joyful, grateful and not drinking as the wonder I feel towards my life is a gift and a constant blessing. I say a gratitude sober prayer each night irrespective of what has unfolded in my day and I bless myself each night, (old catholic traditions are sometimes hard to lose) and I thank the universe and the tribe of ancestors that walk with me daily for the gift of my day.
“
Made with FlippingBook - Online magazine maker