conflict by Pixie lighthorse
Conflict doesn’t have to mean:
Poor relational skills Trigger ping pong Talking while dysregulated Talking a thing to death Shouting Verbal abuse Stonewalling Avoid/Pursue loops Withholding love Punitive consequences Ultimatums Arguing in circles
Name calling Mud slinging Offending from the victim’s position Victim blaming Shaming Abandonment Neglect Misdirected rage Judgement Defensiveness
But it often does look like this, which is why some folx dig in with conflict avoidance. But it’s not moving us to where we want to be. Conflict avoidance leaves us feeling unresolved, cowardly/passive, okay with things not being okay that need attention. It’s violence toward others, ourselves, or both. While emotionally uncomfortable, conflict is part of every day life. Skills, support and practices help immensely. Do we need to engage in conflict with those we’re not in relationship with? No. It’s often a misuse of vital energy. On a social level, we are responsible for engaging institutions as a community so we can effect change.
How we do conflict is how we do relationship. How we do relationship informs how our world takes shape.
Made with FlippingBook - Online magazine maker